This is the first issue of Agents of W.A.D.E.
The issue starts at the bus stop in a Queens suburb as MJ is almost missing the bus to Midtown High.
- MJ: No!
She rushes into the bus and quickly jumps in it.
- MJ: (panting) Whew! Just in time.
She sighs as she sits next to Kitty and Cassie.
- Kitty: There you are, girl. What happened?
- MJ: Almost missed the bus. This whole week was a disaster! A huge one! And it ain't Friday yet.
Flashback starts with both Sinthea and Felicia bullying her.
- Felicia: Little Brain Watson, catch!
She throws a football at her as it hits her.
- MJ: Ow!
It then cuts to her locker as Sinthea places a rat on it. She leaves laughing as MJ then comes and opens it. She ends up screaming.
- MJ: (panicked) A rat came into my locker!
Sinthea then sneaks behind her and throws her into the locker and closes it as flashback ends.
- Cassie: Dang...
- Kitty: Geez, why always you?
- Cassie: Ain't that obvious? Even if she's pretty, she's also a bookworm, also known as a nerd. And nerds are hated.
- MJ: I qualify myself more as a cross between a nerd and a geek. But that explains why I am usually bullied.
- Kitty: Can't argue with that. So, what do we have today?
- Cassie: For lunch?
- Kitty: Yeah.
- Cassie: I think it was spaghetti and meatballs.
- Kitty: Oh, yummy! I love spaghetti and meatballs.
- MJ: So do I.
- Cassie: I guess.
Suddenly, a trapdoor comes out of the bus and the three girls fall on it.
- MJ: (scared) What the heck is going on?
- Kitty: No clue!
- Cassie: I wonder where this is going to stop...
They land at a rather strange room.
- MJ: What is this place?
- Wade: (VO) The Afterlife.
- Kitty: Wait, are we dead? That means you're God?
- Wade: (VO) Kidding!
He turns the chair to them while petting a cat.
- MJ: That mask of yours... are you Spider-Man?
- Wade: (laughs) I wish... but it's just me, Deadpool.
- Kitty: Hey, I know you! Wolverine told me you were a lousy Canadian!
- Wade: Wolverine, eh? Look who's talking! He's Canadian as well! Pretty lousy too. The only thing he likes more than fighting is a can of beer, some Canadian bacon and hockey on TV. Does that sound like a good mentor?
- Cassie: (laughs) Burnt! Oooh!
- Kitty: Aw crud!
- MJ: Hold on, let me see if i got it. You're a vigilante, right?
- Wade: Technically. Like how Nickelback is technically a band.
- Cassie: Or like how Seth Rogen is technically an actor?
- Wade: I guess. But anyway, let me explain the reason you're here.
- Kitty: Finally. Is this a timeshare presentation?
- Wade: No... Lemme explain. You guys know spies?
- MJ: So? Is there any reason to ask about it?
- Wade: I run a spy group. And you girls fit all of the criteria...
- Cassie: How so?
She reveals archive footing of them over the screen.
- MJ: I honestly forgot that I was on the cheerleading team.
- Wade: And you still make a fuss over your nerd status? Look at you, you're cute, nice and kind and kinda athletic too. Also...
He shows Mary Jane next to Peter as Spider-Man upside down.
- MJ: True.
The other two look at it.
- Peter: (archive footage) Wow, I can't believe this. You sure you want to go on with this?
- MJ: (archive footage, giggles) Face it, tiger, you've just hit the jackpot.
- Peter: (archive footage) Wait, you know my true identity?
She takes his mask off.
- MJ: (archive footage) That voice and physique of yours don't fool me, Peter.
She kisses him as the other two are shocked.
- Kitty: Lucky.
- Cassie: Yeah!
- Wade: Ahem! Focus?!
They do so.
- Wade: Good. We have a major problem going on. Heard of Hydra?
- Kitty: A bit of.
- Cassie: (jokingly) Hail Hydra.
They glare at her.
- Cassie: Kidding!
- Wade: Better be. Speaking of it, my girlfriend Vanessa got some shocking information about it.
- Kitty: Wait, you went back to her? I thought you were happy being with Death.
- Wade: I'm not immortal, you dingus. And I would rather love someone who could die around the same time as I do.
- MJ: Aww, that's so heartwarming...
- Cassie: Agreed.
- Wade: Focus, please?
- MJ: Fine.
He shows a photo of Crossbones in the screen.
- Wade: This is Brock Rumlow aka Crossbones, one of Hydra's most formidable henchmen. He is a skilled assassin who can easily take down any kind of menace he finds out. Are you up for this challenge?
- Kitty: How dangerous is this?
- Wade: Kinda dangerous.
Cassie almost freaks out. MJ hugs her.
- MJ: Easy there, Cassie... It's all good now. Trust me.
She stops worrying about it.
- Cassie: I'm good now. Luckily.
- Wade: But no worries, two of you got powers and I will supply gadgets too.
Kitty and Cassie cheer as MJ crosses her arms.
- MJ: (grumbles) It sucks being me.
- Wade: That's why I'm supplying gadgets.
He presses a button on his desk as a bunch of gadgets appear.
- Wade: From all of you, Ms. Watson will need a larger arsenal, given the fact she has no powers.
She sticks her tongue out to Kitty and Cassie.
- Kitty: Not cool!
- Cassie: Yeah!
- MJ: Shut up! I deserve some spotlight as well! Get it?
- Kitty and Cassie: ...
- Wade: Girls, calm down and focus. There's plenty for all of you. Take a look.
They do as they are surprised.
- Kitty: Wow... So... we get stuff too?
- Vanessa: (coming) Well, duh! Want to see?
She presses another button as weapons come out from the walls.
- Cassie: Double wow!
They choose their weapons and smile.
- MJ, Kitty and Cassie: We're ready!
- Wade: Good!
She presses a button as they enter a tube and then are sent into a jet as they're now wearing catsuits.
- Kitty: Cool! Look at us! We look sexy!
- MJ: I agree!
- Cassie: Let's drive this baby!
They do. At the Hydra HQ, Crossbones is preparing to get ready for a massacre. He gets a message from Sinthea and reads it.
- Crossbones: (reading) Crossbones, you know what to do, right? (not reading) Definitely.
He grabs a gun and leaves. At Manhattan, the Spies stopped for a quick snack at a steakhouse.
- Cassie: Mmm, (drooling) this is amazing!
- MJ: Indeed.
They continue eating until they finish as they hear chatter outside.
- Kitty: Something's happening outside.
They look and see Crossbones holding a bunch of bombs.
- Cassie: Look out!
They hide and then change outfits.
- MJ: Ready?
The others nod as they run into him, but Kitty is then distracted by a random male.
- Kitty: Ooh!
She runs into him, but MJ stops her.
- MJ: Don't!
- Kitty: Fine!
She focuses on Crossbones as she prepares to attack.
- Crossbones: Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell the blood of some fools.
- Cassie: Dodge!
They do as Crossbones approaches them.