Cool Rap Wars/Nostalgia Critic vs. Roger Ebert

Nostalgia Critic: Hello I'm the nostalgia critic I remember it so you don't have to. I'm the future generation of movies to review. I been at this gig after you were around. You can never stop me because your down for the count. I've done many reviews and guested many people. Your just stuck behind 2nd place behind Gene Siskel. I've demolished you Ebert and that is a fact I've destroyed you so big and wipe your sweat off my hat

Ebert: Oh the dude who makes a living off the Internet wants to challenge my mind? Face it Doug, you are way past your prime. Remember when you tried to move past the Critic? Demo Reel was shit and pure acidic. And we both know you aren't the best person. Every year that passes your quality worsens. I truly believe I taken you down. For you I give you two thumbs down!

Nostalgia critic: Nice try grandpa I even battled the nerd you only played angel and demon on your show that was turd. And speaking of you hired new critics to save your show. Your Sneak Previews were just telling the entire movie you been downright scared Death came after you. You and Gene's run has really ran dead because you at the movies was just down....right....dread....

(Doug looks down realizing what he said)

Nostalgia Critic: Oh My God, What the hell am I saying? I didn't mean to say that through those roasts I been displaying. Roger Honestly, You were my inspiration through and through....All I wanted to say was...Thank You. You loved my tribute and i have that tweet framed on my wall. And yes I admit my Pink Floyd Review was a downfall...it's cause I miss you I looked up to you as a hero. But now I start to realize I've been just a big zero.

Ebert: Oh Doug I forgive you for what you said. I mean your reviews aren't that bad, they don't make me want to be dead. I also wanna say thank you for fulfilling me and Gene's legacy. I didn't think no one can cover movies as me. I'm proud of you Doug you and all your team because were both different critics who inspire new legacies and there's no other man who can toy with our honor no matter what someone says we'll be any persons future.

???: I didn't expect this battle to go south.

(Suddenly the Mysterious Mr. Enter appears)

Enter: Maybe I can bring some valuable critiques. Ebert your the father of reviews you get a pass. But Doug it's time to kick your ass. You make reviews of movies but your own kinda suck. And the amount you made what the fuck? And can I tell you a question between you and me? Why haven't you set Malcolm and Tamara free? Your reviews have fallen like Pink Floyd's wall. In a rap battle Enter rules all.

NC: Enter you review cartoons and act such as a prick. The only character you always hate is Patrick. and you review the same shows what a calamity. Only you can be such a youtube attrocity. You hide in a trench and hat like you were selling drugs Yet all you do is show MLP love. We've both beaten you Enter and its not that mysterious though we are all critics you don't take things serious. We've won Mr.Enter and thus you can't deny we will always live on whether we are alive or have died

(Suddenly Gene Shalit comes)

Gene: Did anyone call for-

(Suddenly again squashing noises are heard as a giant Rotten Tomato appears)

Rotten Tomatoes: I deem you all rotten: I am the ultimate reviewer nobody can stop this ultimate reviewer. Ebert you started good but you've gotten weaker. As for Shalit your mustache absolutely sucks. And Enter your temper is uncontrollable what the fuck? Doug my sweet Doug you have become corrupt. I have no personality to allow me to erupt. So I have taken care of all of you reviewer pests. Am I citizen Kane? Because I am the best!