Star Trek: The Fifth Element/Transcripts



OPENING CREDITS

Egypt, 1914

(A boy riding on a camel. The boys cheer.)

Boy 1: Come, come!

Boy 2: Please! Please!

(The boy sees Professor and Billy looking at the writings on the wall.)

Boy 3: Aziz. Aziz.

(Aziz sleeps)

Professor: Aziz, light!

(Aziz wakes up)

Billy: Aziz, light. (he marks at the "Aziz, light!" list.)

Professor: Good. We start again. "When the three planets are in eclipse, the black hole, like a door, is open. Evil comes... spreading terror and chaos." See the snake, Billy? The Ultimate Evil. Make sure you get the snake.

Billy: Yes, I've got your snakes. (draws a picture of a snake) I got all the snakes. So when is this snake act supposed to occur?

Professor: Well, if this is the five... and this is the one... (mumbles) Every 5000 years.

Billy: So I've got some time, then.

(Priest arrives.)

Priest: You bring them water. Good boy. I will take it to them. Go with God. Be safe from evil.

Professor: You see here these different peoples, or symbols of people... gathering together the four elements of life: water, fire, earth, air... around a fifth one. A Fifth Element.

Priest: Forgive me, lord. They already know too much.

(The Priest opens the water skin and begins to pour a vial of powder into the skin.)

Billy: Father.

Professor: Yes, how are you today?

Priest: Very well. You have some glasses?

Professor: Of course. Father, I'm so glad to see you. It's the most extraordinary thing. I mean, look. It's the greatest find in history.

Priest: Yes. You must be parched. (Priest pours water on a cup.)

Professor: Oh, yes, yes. I'm sorry. I mean, it's like a battle plan. Here, the good. Here, the evil. And here, a weapon against evil. I'm going to be famous.

Priest: Then... Then let us toast to your fame.

Professor: To fame. salud.. (The Professor raises the cup to drink, and then...) You can't drink a toast with water. (he tosses away his water.) Billy, in my sack, the grappa.

Billy: Yes. (Billy is looking for the grappa in the Professor's bag.)

Professor: This I don't understand. But this... this could be something... prehistoric. Maybe? I don't know. But wait. Here. Here.

Boy 1: Look, look.

(The alien spaceship arrives.)

Priest: They're here.

Professor: This man... this perfect being. I know this is the key. I know it. This Divine Light they talk about. What is Divine Light? Aziz, light! (The room is flooded with light all of the sudden.) Much better. Thank you, Aziz.

(The hatch opens.)

Priest: My lord.

(The aliens known as Mondoshawans enter.)

Professor: Father, this is the most unbelievable thing I have ever seen. Don't you think...? (sees the Mondoshawan) Are you German? (The Mondoshawan nods no)

Priest: Lord, I know he was about to discover everything. But there is no worry. I was there in time.

Mondoshawan Commander: Priest, you and those before you... have served us well. But war is coming. Stones not safe on Earth anymore.

(The Mondoshawan Commander comes to the wall. He pulls out a special key of his finger. The walls were the doors open.)

Professor: This... is really amazing.

(One of the MONDOSHAWANS waves his hand, puts the professor to sleep. The Mondoshawans head for the new corridor. There is the chamber the Elemental Stones and the Fifth Element rest.)

Priest: The Fifth Element.

Mondoshawan Commander: Take the stones.

(The Mondoshawans gather the stones and put them in the case. Billy pulls out a gun and sees the Mondoshawans carrying the Fifth Element to their ship.)

Priest: My lord... if you take the weapon, we will be defenseless when the evil returns.

Mondoshawan Commander: In 300 years, when evil returns... so shall we.

(Billy runs to the sleepy professor.)

Billy: Oh, professor. Professor. (The Mondoshawan Commander notices Billy.) Don't move! I... I have a gun!

Priest: Billy. Please, understand. They're our friends.

Billy: Ff lends? Father, they've killed the professor. They're monsters.

Priest: I'll explain everything. Billy...

Billy: You're with them?

Priest: Billy, look at me. I am your friend.

Billy: No, Father.

Priest: Billy, look at me! Please, put the gun down.

Billy: No. (Trips on a bag.)

Priest: Billy, no!

(Billy accidentally fires at the Mondoshawan Commander. The wall begins to close.)

Priest: Hurry! The wall is closing!

Mondoshawan Commander: Here is your mission now: Pass your knowledge to the next priest as it was passed on to you.

Priest: I will do as you command, but please, hurry, you still have time.

Mondoshawan Commander: Time not important. Only life important.

(The Mondoshawan Commander reaches his hand with a key. The wall closes, crushing his arm as the Priest hangs his head. The huge ship's main hatch closes.)

Priest: I will fulfill my mission! You can count on me! I will pass the knowledge until your return!

(The ship lifts off and speeds away.)

300 YEARS LATER

IN THE 23RD CENTURY...

Second Officer's log, stardate 8422.3. Admiral Kirk is demoted to the rank of Captain for disobeying a direct order from the Commander, Starfleet, Morrow. He returned to the command of the Starship Enterprise.

[Enterprise-A holodeck, ancient temple]

Mera: See that symbol, Captain Spock?

Spock: A planetary alignment.

Mera: Captain Kirk. "When the three planets are in eclipse, the black hole, like a door, is open. Evil comes... spreading terror and chaos."

Kirk: What evil, Mera?

Mera: This is no ordinary evil. The Ultimate Evil. More powerful than V'Ger.

COMM VOICE: Bridge to holodeck. Captain Kirk. You've been requested on the bridge, sir.

[Enterprise-A bridge]

SULU: Captain on the bridge.

Uhura: Spock, we've arrived at the coordinates you calculated.

Chekov: Two planets are in their alignments. One is undergo. Four minutes, thirty seconds.

Mera: I believe it's time.

Sulu: Captain, the Federated Warship had entered the sector.

[Federated Warship]

Crewman 1: Deploy intership stabilizer.

Crewman 2: Power capacitors: check.

General Staedert: Anything yet?

First Officer: No, sir.

General Staedert: Not even a temperature?

First Officer: The analyzers have jammed. One shows a million degrees, the others minus 5000.

General Staedert: Let's see it.

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Uhura: General Staedert, this is the Starship Enterprise. You know you came to this place.

Chekov: One minute.

Mera: The planet is taking shape.

Spock: Evil's coming, Captain.

[Federated Warship]

Crewman 3: It's taking shape.

(In the middle of the shadows, a door to the nightmare has just opened. Evil is back. A round, moving mass, continually changing color.)

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Sulu: My ...God.

Kirk: The Great Evil!

[Federated Warship]

General Staedert: Send out a probe.

[New York City Headquarters]

Man: Ladies and gentlemen, the president of the Federated Territories.

President's Aide: On air with General Staedert in 30 seconds.

(Father Vito Cornelius appears)

David: Oh, I saved this seat for you, Father.

[Federated Warship]

First Officer: President on the line.

General Staedert: We're in position, Mr. President.

[New York City Headquarters]

President Lindberg: I have to address the Supreme Council. Just the facts, general.

[Federated Warship]

General Staedert: No results from the chemical and molecular analysis yet. All the calibers are overshot. We're initiating thermonucleatic imaging.

[New York City Headquarters]

President Lindberg: So, what you're saying is, you don't know what this is.

[Federated Warship]

General Staedert: Not yet. All we know is it just keeps getting bigger.

[New York City Headquarters]

President Lindberg: Recommendation?

[Federated Warship]

General Staedert: My philosophy is shoot first and ask questions later. I don't like uninvited guests.

[New York City Headquarters]

President Lindberg: All right, then, Staedert...

Cornelius: Mr. President?

President: Yes'?

Man: Priest Vito Cornelius... expert of astrophenomenon.

Cornelius: I have a different theory to offer you, sir.

President: You have 20 seconds.

Cornelius: Imagine for a moment that this... thing is not anything that can be identified... because it prefers not to be. Wherever there is life, it brings death... because it is evil. Absolute evil.

President: One more reason to shoot first.

Cornelius: Evil begets evil, Mr. President. Shooting will only make it stronger.

[Federated Warship]

Probe will attain its objective in five seconds.

(Evil swallows the probe and immediately bubbles over with activity like a furious volcano.)

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Mera: Spock! You got to see it.

(Mera replays a recorder.)

Kirk: Give me magnify.

Spock: Curious.

[New York City Headquarters]

General Munro: Growth rate is at 27 percent.

President: Your theory is interesting, Father, but we don't have time.

Cornelius: Time is of no importance, Mr. President. Only life is important.

President: You're right. That's exactly what we're gonna do. We're gonna protect the life of 200 billion of my fellow citizens. General, you may fire when ready.

[Federated Warship]

General Staedert: Up-front loading of a 120-ZR missile. Marker lights on the objective.

(All of a sudden, outside the ship, the strange planet's activity ceases. A black crust immediately covers it.)

[New York City Headquarters]

Scientist 1: Its structure solidified on the surface.

Scientist: I think it's anticipating the attack. Anticipation denotes intelligence.

Cornelius: The most terrible intelligence imaginable, Mr. President.

[Enterprise-A bridge]

McCOY: Well, I've got the sick bay ready. Now will someone please tell me what's going on?

Mera: Doctor, a probe General Staedert sent. It gave the Evil the ability to communicate.

Spock: The most terrible intelligence imaginable, Captain.

[Federated Warship]

Crewman 1: One-twenty's loaded.

General Staedert: The ship is in combat formation. Missiles are loaded, Mr. President.

[New York City Headquarters]

President: Staedert.

Staedert: (OC) Yes, sir.

President: I have a doubt.

[Federated Warship]

Staedert: I don't, Mr. President.

[The warship fires three missiles at Evil. This causes it to grow large.]

[New York City Headquarters]

President: Staedert. What happened? Staedert, can you hear me? Staedert? What happened, Staedert?

[Federated Warship]

President: (OC) Did you destroy it?

Staedert: I'm about to, sir.

[The warship fires more missiles at Evil, causing it to grow larger.]

[New York City Headquarters]

Scientist: The planet has increased in diameter by 200 percent.

General Munro: It's moving towards the ship.

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Chekov: Captain!

[The Great Evil starts to move]

(Collision alert sounds)

Kirk: Mr. Sulu, get us out of here, best speed possible!

SULU: Aye sir. Full impulse power.

[Federated Warship]

Staedert: What... What do we have that's bigger than 240?

First Officer: Nothing, sir.

[New York City Headquarters]

President: Staedert, do you hear me? Get out of there. I don't want an incident. Do you hear me, Staedert?

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Kirk: Staedert, Mr. President ordered you to retreat or you die.

[Federated Warship]

[The crew starts abandoning the ship.]

President: [OC] Get out of there. Can you hear me, Staedert? [A bead of sweat pearls Staedert's forehead.] Do you understand? Listen.

[New York City Headquarters]

President: This is the president. That's an order.

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Uhura: Enterprise to General Staedert. Staedert, please respond!

[Federated Warship]

President: [OC] Do you understand me? Do you hear me? Get out of there! Answer me!

Uhura: [OC] Staedert. This is the Enterprise.

Staedert: Good God.

[The Great Evil unleashes a flaming skull at the warship.]

[New York Apartment]

[Korben wakes up from a nightmare. The alarm clock rings. Dallas turns off a alarm and turns on lights.]

Computer: Four a day.

[The cat outside mewing in the hall]

Korben: I'm trying.

Computer: To quit is my goal.

(Cell phone rings)

Korben: Hey, hey, hey! I'm up. All right. I'm up. God. Yeah, yeah. Mes'?

Finger: [OC] Hey, dog brain, Finger here.

[Korben lets a cat in.]

Korben: Hi, sweetie.

Finger: [OC] I love you too, major.

Korben: But you haven't called me that since basic training. I was talking to the cat.

Finger: [OC] Oh, yeah, I forgot... you still prefer your cat to the real thing.

Korben: At least the cat comes back.

Finger: [OC] Still pining for that two-timing slut? There's a million women out there.

Korben: I don't want a million women. I just want one. The perfect one.

Finger: [OC] It don't exist, major.

Korben: Yeah. I know. My friend Kirk is demoted from Admiral to Captain.

Finger: [OC] Yeah. ...What?

Korben: Just found a picture of you.

Finger: [OC] How do I look?

Korben: Like shit.

Finger: [OC] Must be an old picture. Listen, bring me your hack for a six-month overhaul.

Korben: Negative.

Finger: [OC] ASAP.

Korben: I don't need one.

Finger: [OC] Hey, you forgetting who sat next to you for 1000 missions? I know how you drive.

Korben: Finger, I drive a cab now, not a space fighter.

Finger: [OC] Okay, so tell me. How many points you got left on your license? Major, how many points?

Korben: At least 50.

Finger: [OC] You know what? You gotta learn how to lie better. See you tonight.

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Mera: I'm sorry, Captain. General Staedert is dead.

Kirk: Uhura, get me the president.

Uhura: Aye, sir.

[New York City Headquarters]

General Munro: Call from the Enterprise, Mr. President.

Kirk: [OC] This is Captain Kirk.

President: Kirk, can you destroy that thing?

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Mera: Evil begets evil, Captain. Shooting will only make it stronger.

Kirk: President, we're not attack at that thing like Staedert. We're look a way to destroy it.

Spock: Jim, Mera knows the only weapon the Mondoshawans safeguard from the World War I.

McCoy: Spock. That dark planet have eyes and ears.

Mera: Sulu, take us away from the dark planet. Warp two.

Sulu: Yes, Mera.

[The Enterprise warps away.]

Kirk: Reverse power.

Sulu: Reverse power. Decelerating.

Kirk: Dead stop. Spock, I want a staff meeting on the briefing room.

[New York Apartment]

Woman: Welcome to paradise.

Ruby Rhod: Welcome to Fhloston Paradise. It's Ruby Rhod, your main man, and I will tell you live at 5... the winner of the super-green Gemini Croquette Contest! The winner will go with me for two days to Fhloston Paradise. So tune in to Radio Cosmos.

Korben: Don't watch it all clay, sweetie. It'll rot your brain.

Woman: For a perfect world.

[A thief wearing a hat with a picture of the background arms a big gun 2-140.]

Thief: Give me the cash.

Korben: Been here long?

Thief: Yeah, long enough. Come on, give me the cash.

Korben: Is that a 2-140? Alleviated titanium. Neurocharged assault model.

Thief: Yeah. Yeah.

Korben: Good thing for me it's not loaded.

Thief: What do you mean, it's not loaded?

Korben: Well, you have to push that little yellow button to load it. Take your time.

Thief: Oh, God...

Korben: You want me to...? Okay. [The thief pushes yellow button.] There you go.

Thief: Give me the cash!

[2-140 powers down. Korben pulls his handgun on thief.]

Korben: That's a very dangerous gun. Maybe you better let me hang on to this one for you, huh? [Korben takes a big gun away and puts in a closet full of guns] You don't mind, do you? You sure?

Thief: No. No. Take it. I don't need it.

Korben: That's a very nice hat.

Thief: You like it? God!

[Taxi Cab]

Taxi Computer: Please enter your license.

Korben: Yes. Yes, just a minute.

Taxi Computer: Welcome on board, Mr. Dallas.

Korben: Good morning. Sleep well? Me too. I had a horrible nightmare.

Taxi Computer: Propulsion 2-X-4. You have five points left on your license.

Korben: Yeah. Thank you for reminding me.

Taxi Computer: Have a nice day.

Korben: Why not?

[New York City Headquarters]

[Cornelius had brought a book.]

Cornelius: You have 48 hours. That's the time it needs to adapt to our living conditions.

President: And then?

Cornelius: And then it will be too late. The goal of this thing is not to fight over money or power... but to exterminate life. All forms of life.

President: So, what you're telling me, father, there's nothing that can stop this.

Cornelius: There is only one thing.

[Enterprise-A Briefing room]

Mera: My caretaker Father Vito Cornelius told me about the tales of the Great Evil.

Spock: Captain, we have 48 hours. That's the time it needs to adapt to our living conditions. And then it will be too late.

KIRK: I need the goal of that thing.

Mera: Its goal is to exterminate life. Not to fight over money or power. There is only one thing that can stop this.

[New York City Headquarters]

Cornelius: The Mondoshawan have in their possession the only weapon to defeat Evil. Four elements... gathered around a fifth... supreme being, the ultimate warrior, created to protect life. Together, they produce what the ancients call the Light of Creation. Able to bring life to the farthest reaches of the universe. But if Evil stands there...

President: Then what?

Cornelius: Then light turns to dark, life to death... forever.

[Enterprise-A Briefing room]

Spock: The universe is in Hell.

Kirk: But before Evil stands here, is the Fifth Element can stop it?

Mera: Yes, Here, the good. Here, the evil. And here, a weapon against Evil.

Uhura: Captain, a Mondoshawan spaceship requests permission to enter the Federated territory.

[New York City Headquarters]

General Munro: Sir, there's the Mondoshawan spaceship at the frontier requesting permission to enter our territory.

President: Give it permission to enter our territory with our warmest regards.

Cornelius: Thank you.

[Mondoshawan spaceship]

Soldier: [OC] Permission to enter granted.

[As the Mondoshawan spaceship flies, two shuttles appear.]

[Zorg shuttle]

Aknot: Showtime.

[The Mangalores attack the Mondoshawan spaceship, causing it to crash-land on another planet.]

[New York City Headquarters]

Cornelius: We are lost.

[Enterprise-A Briefing room]

Scott: Mera, are you okay?

Mera: We are lost.

[Zorg shuttle]

Akanit: [OC] Aknot, we are connected to Earth.

[Zorg Industries]

Woman: Mr. Zorg's office.

Aknot: [OC] It's Aknot.

Zorg: I'm so glad to hear you, Aknot.

Aknot: [OC] The mission is accomplished. You'll have what you asked for in a few hours.

Zorg: Good. I'll meet you at my factory.

[New York City Headquarters]

General Munro: The attack was launched by two unregistered warships.

President: Close all borders and declare a state of general alert. Try to contact the Mondoshawans. We owe them an explanation.

Cornelius: Three hundred years of waiting, for nothing.

President: Father, go home and get some rest.

Cornelius: No. The Mondoshawan... I am their contact on Earth. They will come for me.

President: This is government business now. I will keep you informed.

General Munro: The rescue team has reported from the crash site.

President: Any survivors?

General Munro: Only one.

[Enterprise-A Briefing room]

Kirk: Ensign Call.

Call: Yes, Captain.

Kirk: The attack was launched by two unregistered warships. Show her.

Call: Kirk. I know that logo.

Scott: What?

Call: Zorg Industries!

McCoy: Zorg Industries?

Call: Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel Zorg, the infamous industrialist.

Kirk: Cockpit view.

Call: Mangalores. They're warriors. They're shape-shifting aliens. Zorg sent to launch the attack.

Spock: Zorg using Klingon design for the Mangalores.

Kirk: Call, the Great Evil is going to get the element stones and avoid the protection of the Fifth Element. I want you to see Mr. Zorg.

Call: Aye, sir.

Mera: Kirk. Cornelius was contact of the Mondoshawan on Earth.

Kirk: Uhura, try to contact the Mondoshawans. Tell them where the stones are.

Uhura: Aye, sir.

Spock: Mera, The rescue team has reported from the crash site. They found one survivor.

Kirk: Mera, I have a special job for you. Check the Fifth Element.

Mera: Yes sir.

[New York City LABORATORY]

[An arm, on a surgical cart, moves down the hall of the Nucleological Center, the most sterile of environments.]

General Munro: Is that what you call a survivor?

Mactilburgh: A few cells are still alive. More than I need.

General Munro: Have you identified it?

Mactilburgh: We tried, but the computer went off the charts. You see, normal human beings have 40 DNA memo groups... which is enough for any species to perpetuate. This has 200,000 memo groups.

General Munro: Sounds like a freak of nature to me.

Mactilburgh: Yeah. Can't wait to meet him.

[Laboratory]

Doctor: You okay, general? Over here.

General Munro: Excuse me.

Mera: The Fifth Element.

Mactilburgh: Okay, general, I wanna show you something here. This is a normal human DNA chain, okay? You, me, anybody, right? Watch this. The compositional elements of his DNA chain are the same as ours. There's simply more of them, with infinite genetic knowledge. Almost like this being was engineered.

General Munro: Is there any danger?

Mactilburgh: No, no. We put it through the cellular hygiene detector. The cell is... for lack of a better word... perfect.

General Munro: Okay. Go ahead. But Mr. Perfect better be polite. Otherwise, I turn him into cat food.

[Munro uses his personal key to open the self-destruct box, ready to use it.]

Mactilburgh: Activate it.

[A reconstitution device starts. First, it creates the skeleton.]

Mactilburgh: Tissue processing.

[A device recreates a human body tissue.]

Doctor 1: Ten seconds to ultraviolet protection.

[A shield comes over the reconstructing body and makes it invisible.]

Mactilburgh: This is The last phase. The cells are bombarded by slightly greasy solar atoms... which forces the body to react to protect itself. That means growing skin.

Munro: Wonderful.

[The meter slows, drops to zero.]

Doctor 2: Reconstruction complete.

Mactilburgh: Remove the shield.

[A shield moves away to reveal the Supreme Being in the form of a female human.]

Mactilburgh: I told you. Perfect. Thermal bandages.

[Thermal bandages appear to cover up nudity.]

Munro: I'd like to take a few pictures... for the archives.

[A an overhead camera appears and flashes a woman, awakening her. She is gasping and panicking while attempting to exit her confinement in the chamber of the machine. She takes note of the humans watching her.]

Leeloo: [speaking unknown language]

Munro: What's she saying?

Mactilburgh: I don't know. Activate the phonic detector.

Leeloo: [speaking unknown language]

Munro: Is...? Is that thing solid?

Mactilburgh: Unbreakable.

Munro: Good. [walks to a woman, who states another unknown word in a warning tone. He taps on the window] If you want out... you're gonna have to learn to develop those communication skills.

[A woman stares at him menacingly, growling deep in her throat, breaks the glass with her fist and knocks Munro out. She quickly accesses the controls outside the chamber.]

Doctor 1: General alert.

Guard: Security.

[The woman looks at the scientists and runs through the wall.]

Mactilburgh: Perfect.

[Alarm blares]

Officer: Ladder on 18. Two with me. The rest, main ventilation.

Officer 2: Okay, sir.

[The woman runs through the ventilation system]

Officer 1: This way.

[The woman has exited to a ledge on the 450th floor of a building, right in the middle of Manhattan, which we discover for the first time. The city has become monstrous. Buildings rise 600 stories.]

Chief: Okay, lady. Stay calm. This is the police. There's nowhere else to go. You're gonna slowly turn around and put your hands on the floor. Do you understand me? [The woman doesn't understand and flees.] She doesn't. [The girl edges along the narrow ledge, unfazed by the height. The CHIEF leans out the vent, looking out into the void.] I think we need a flying unit here.

[The police flying unit arrives.]

Police Officer: This is the police. This is the police. We are processing your identification. Please put your arms up and follow our instructions. [The computer scans the woman and "NO FILE" sign appears.] She has no file. [The woman jumps off!] She dove off.

[The police flying unit flies after the woman. She crashes into Korben's taxi cab.]

Korben: Sorry.

Taxi Computer: You just had an accident.

Korben: Yes. I know I just had an accident, you daffy bastard.

Korben and Taxi Computer: You have one point left on your license.

Korben: Yeah. [honks horn] Look out! Oh, no, left! I can't believe it. Shit. ...Any survivors? (He sees the woman) Hi. You okay?

Leeloo: [speaking unknown language] Boom.

Korben: Boom. Yeah, I understand "boom."

Leeloo: Bada boom.

Korben: Big. Big bada boom.

Leeloo: Big... bada big boom. Big boom.

Korben: Yeah. Yeah, big bada boom.

Leeloo: Bada boom. Big boom. Big bada boom.

Korben: You know, you're lucky you're not dead.

[The police sirens]

Police Officer: This is a police control. Please keep your hands on the wheel. You have an unauthorized passenger in your vehicle. We are going to arrest her. Thank you for your cooperation.

Korben: Sorry, honey. Looks like this is your ride.

Police Officer: Open the door. [The police car door opens and one of the officers prep a hook.]

Korben: I'm gonna do what they say. Sorry.

Leeloo: "Please... help."

Korben: I only got one point on my license. I need that to get back to the garage and get the cab a six-month overhaul. You understand.

Police Officer: Can you please open the passenger door?

Leeloo: Please... help.

Korben: I can't.

Police Officer: I repeat... can you please open your passenger door?

Korben: Yeah. Yeah, sure. Why not?

[Korben opens a passenger door and the officer hooks to the cab.]

Police Officer: Thank you for your cooperation.

Leeloo: Help.

Korben: Finger's gonna kill me.

[Korben starts his cab and drives away.]

Police Officer: Hey! Emergency! Emergency!

Taxi Computer: One point has been removed from your license.

Korben: Yes, I know! [He pulls a wires out, shutting down a computer] This is so stupid.

All units, assist in pursuit of yellow cab.

Unit 47, we're on the way...

as soon as we finish lunch.

- Two golden menus. - Thank you.

I'm too old, too tired and too hungry to go chasing some hot rod.

Thank you so much.

And I'm definitely too thirsty.

Look out!

We got lucky.

If they don't chase you after a mile, they don't chase you.

Maybe it's two miles.

Hang on.

Look, lady, I only speak two languages: English and bad English!

Run an ID.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for conversation...

but maybe you can just shut up for a minute!

- He's got a scan blocker. - Means he's a car thief. Blast him.

I don't know what you did to piss these guys off...

but they are really pissed off! Hold on!

I think we're safe for a while.

You wanna play it soft? I'll play it soft.

You wanna play it hard? Let's play it hard.

If I can get to the fog, we'll be all right.

If we make the fog.

How do they expect us to find anything in this shit?

We're just gonna wait here until things quiet down, if you don't mind.

Hey.

Shit.

You okay?

Priest.

You don't need a priest, you just need a doctor.

- Vito Cornelius. - What?

Priest.

Yes?

I'm looking for a priest.

The weddings are one floor down, my son. Congratulations.

She's not my bride. She's my fare.

She's looking for Vito Cornelius. The phone book said he lived here.

Yes, that's me, but I don't know who she is.

Nobody knows who she is. No file, no ID, nothing.

She's got a tattoo on this arm, here.

Tattoo?

Fifth...

element.

Finger's gonna kill me.

- Hey! Wake up. - Who are you?

I brought the girl, remember? The redhead.

She just dropped in on me. Started speaking this bizarre language.

It's not bizarre. It's the divine language.

- The ancient language. - Okay.

Spoken throughout the universe before time was time.

- He's a she. - You noticed that, huh?

Yes.

- It's a miracle. - Miracle she's not dead.

Not a moment to lose. Wake her up.

But gently, because this woman is mankind's most precious possession.

She... She is perfect.

Perfect.

More dignified.

Hey, lady.

Wake up.

You're right. You're right. I shouldn't have done that.

L... It was wrong to kiss you.

He said to wake you gently.

You're right. You're right.

Just thought you might remember me from the cab.

Remember?

"Bada boom"?

- "Big bada boom"? - Boom?

Boom. Big bada boom. In the cab. Here, look.

I drive a cab. This is me.

Korben Dallas.

Korben. You understand?

Here. Take it, go ahead.

You can call me when you learn how to speak English.

Just kidding. Kidding.

And you...? What is your name?

You.

Korben.

Leeloo Minai Lekarariba-Laminai-Tchai Ekbat De Sebat.

Good. That's...

That whole thing's your name, huh?

Do you have...

a shorter name?

Short.

Korben Dallas.

Leeloo.

Leeloo.

Korben, Leeloo.

Leeloo, Korben.

- Father, you sure she's a supreme being? - Absolutely sure.

Old friends. Okay.

Yeah. You're right. Okay.

- Ask her for my gun back please.

Kirk: Leeloo, Ben never keep it loaded.

- What's your name?

Korben Dallas.

Thank you, Mr. Dallas, for all your help.

Thank you. You've been so kind, but now the girl needs some rest.

Because she's been on a long trip.

Yes. I know. I was there when she landed.

Wait, wait. Hey, wait, Father.

She said something I didn't understand. Well, I didn't understand any of it.

- What does "ekto gamat" mean? - "Never without my permission."

- That's what I thought. - Yeah.

I shouldn't have kissed her.

Oh, no. I'm so sorry. I forgot your food.

How about some nice Thai food to apologize, huh?

Yeah. Yeah, hold on. What?

Hey, buddy, I'm waiting all day here.

- Finger. - Where is the cab?

Car's running fine. Purring like a kitten.

Fine. What "fine"?

I know you, Dallas. "Fine" ain't in your vocabulary.

You can tell your old buddy Finger what happened.

- What? You save the planet? - Listen...

You dinged the fender again. Right? Dinged the goddamn fender again.

Finger, I was on my way over to see you, and a big fare fell in my lap.

You know, one of these really big fares that you just can't resist.

HOW big?

Five-nine...

blue eyes...

long legs, great skin.

You know, perfect.

I see.

And this perfect fare, she got a name?

Yeah. Leeloo.

What's she doing?

Learning our history, the last 5000 years that she's missed.

She's been asleep for quite a while, you know.

Father, I know she's been through a lot, but we don't have much time.

Yes. You're right.

Chicken.

Good.

Chicken.

I'm really sorry to interrupt you...

but the case...

with the stones...

where is it?

Stolen?

Who in God's name would do such a thing?

Excuse me, sir. The council is worried about the economy heating up.

They wondered if it could be possible to fire 500,000?

I thought from one of the smaller companies no one would notice.

- Like one of the cab companies. - Fire one million.

But 500,000...

One million. Fine, sir.

Sorry to have disturbed you.

Oh, it's...

- It's for the Supreme... - Yes, yes, yes.

Oh, sorry.

I didn't know your size, and I found you this makeup box.

Okay? You just put it like that.

Yes, there was a man with a limp...

who came here a month ago asking questions about the stones.

He said he was an art dealer.

What was his name?

I'm so bad with names.

- They really make her... - Perfect. I know.

What did she say?

She says she knows exactly where they are.

She says she knows exactly where they are.

My dear Aknot, how about those two little planes that you borrowed?

Aknot, is that you? What an ugly face.

It doesn't suit you.

Take it off.

That's better.

Never be ashamed of who you are.

You're warriors. Be proud.

So what if the federal government scattered your people to the wind.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Your time for revenge is at hand.

Voilà: the ZF-1.

It's light. Handle's adjustable for easy carrying. Good for righties and lefties.

Breaks down into four parts, undetectable by x-ray. Ideal for discreet interventions.

A word on firepower:

Titanium recharger, 3000-round clip with bursts of three to 300.

With the replay button, another Zorg invention, it's even easier.

One shot...

and replay sends every following shot to the same location.

And to finish the job, all the Zorg oldies but goldies.

Rocket launcher.

Arrow launcher with exploding or poisonous-gas heads.

Very practical. Our famous net launcher.

The always-efficient flamethrower.

My favorite.

And for the grand finale, the all-new ice-cube system.

Four full crates delivered right on time.

And what about you, my dear Aknot? Did you bring me what I asked you for?

Yes.

Zorg: Magnificent. (opens a case, then closes after wind blows) ThiS... This case is empty.

[Cornelius' Apartment]

[Leeloo laughs to make wind sound]

Cornelius: What do you mean, empty?

[Zorg Industries]

Call: Empty... the opposite of full.

Zorg: I know, Call. This case is supposed to be full! Anyone care to explain?

[Cornelius's Apartment]

Leeloo: [speaking unknown language]

Cornelius: The Guardians gave the stones to someone that they could trust. Who took another route. She's supposed to contact this person... in a hotel. And she's looking for the address. Easy.

[Leeloo checks a star map.]

Leeloo: Dot.

David: It's Planet Fhloston in the Angel Constellation.

Cornlius: We're saved.

[Enterprise-A Mera's quarters]

Mera: The Mondoshawans gave the stones to someone that they could trust. I believe She's supposed to contact this person in a hotel.

Spock: Mera, if you follow me.

[Enterprise-A Astrometrics lab]

Kirk: Where are the stones, Mera?

Mera: Computer, location of four stone.

Computer voice: Location: Fhloston. Class-M planet. Constellation: Angel.

Kirk: We're saved.

[Zorg Industries]

Zorg: I'm screwed.

Aknot: You asked for a case. We brought you a case.

Zorg: A case with four stones in it! Not one or two or three, but four! Four stones! What the hell am I supposed to do with an empty case?!

Aknot: We are warriors, not merchants.

Zorg: But you can still count! Look, it's easy. Look at my fingers. Four stones, four crates. Zero stones, zero crates! Pack everything up! We're out of here!

[The Mangalores hold their guns at Zorg.]

Aknot: We risked our lives. I believe a little compensation is in order.

Zorg: So you are merchants after all. Leave them one crate... for the cause. [Zorg leaves and Call takes the ZF-1.] I don't like warriors. Too narrow-minded, no subtlety... and worse, they fight for hopeless causes, honor. Honor's killed millions of people. Hasn't saved a single one. I'll tell you what I do like though, a killer. A dyed-in-the-wool killer, cold-blooded, clean, methodical and thorough. Now, a real killer picking up the ZF-1 would've asked about the little red button on the bottom of the gun.

[The Mangalores are using Zorg ZF-1 Pod Weapons. One of them pushes the red button, causing an explosive.]

Zorg: Bring me the priest.

[Cornelius' Apartment]

David: I got everything we need to know about Fhloston Paradise... and a blueprint of the hotel.

Cornelius: Good work. Now, all we've gotta do is find a way of getting there.

David: Not gonna be easy. There's a charity ball tomorrow. Flights are full, and with all the celebrities, the hotel will be guarded like a fortress.

Cornelius: But there must be a way of getting there.

I'll get it.

Weddings?

Not really.

- Mr. Zorg would like to talk to you. - Mister who?

- Mr. Zorg would like to talk to you. - Mister who?

Mr. Zorg.

Jean-Baptiste Emmanuel...

Zorg.

It's nice to see you again, Father.

I remember you now.

The so-called art dealer.

Well, I'm glad you got your memory back because you're gonna need it.

Where are the stones?

I don't know. And even if I did, I wouldn't tell somebody like you.

Why?

- What's wrong with me? - I try to serve life.

But you only...

seem to want to destroy it.

Oh, Father...

you're so wrong.

Let me explain.

Life, which you so nobly serve...

comes from destruction, disorder and chaos.

Now, take this empty glass.

Here it is, peaceful, serene, boring.

But if it is...

destroyed...

Look at all these little things. So busy now.

Notice how each one is useful.

What a lovely ballet ensues, so full of form and color.

Now, think about all those people that created them.

Technicians, engineers. People who will be able to feed their children tonight...

so those children can grow up big and strong, and have children of their own...

and so on and so forth.

Thus adding to the great chain...

of life.

Water. Fruit.

You see, Father, by creating a little destruction...

A cherry.

I'm, in fact, encouraging life.

In reality, you and I are in the same business.

Cheers.

Where's the robot to pat you on the back?

Or the engineer?

Or their children, maybe?

There, you see now how all your so-called power...

counts for absolutely nothing?

How your entire empire of destruction comes crashing down...

all because of one little cherry.

You saved my life...

and in return, I'll spare yours...

for now.

You're a monster, Zorg.

I know.

Torture who you have to, the president, I don't care.

Just bring me those stones.

You have one hour.

[Space, several satellites are sucked into the Ultimate Evil.]

[Federated Warship]

Crewman: It's gobbling up all the communication satellites in the galaxy.

[New York City Headquarters]

President: Why in the hell is it eating up all the satellites?

Munro: We're working on it, Mr. President.

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Mera: Spock, the Great Evil is gobbling all the communication satellites in the galaxy.

Spock: Mera, Evil is aware of the failures of the Mangalores.

Kirk: Work it, Mera.

[New York City Headquarters]

[A cockroach crawls onto the desk. There's a small antenna on its back. Zorg's Right Arm wears earphones, monitoring the President's conversation with the cockroach-spy.]

Munro: I managed to contact the Mondoshawan. They deplore the incident but accept our apologies.

President: And the stones? Did you find them?

Munro: The stones weren't aboard the ship.

President: What are you mean?

Munro: The Mondoshawan never fully trusted the human race. So they gave up the stones to someone they do trust. Her name is Plavalaguna. She's a diva. She's singing at a charity ball in Fhloston Paradise in a few hours. She has the stones with her. The Mondoshawans have... [A cockroach-spy moves] All we have to do is send someone to get the stones, bring them back.

President: Excellent. [President crushes a cockroach with his shoe. Right Arm yells as his earphones fly off his head.] I want this operation to be discreet as possible. No troops. No big operation. I want your best man to go undercover.

Munro: I have the perfect one.

- You got a message. - Yeah.

Not gonna open it? Could be important.

Yeah. Like the last two I got were important.

First one was from my wife telling me she's leaving.

The second was from my lawyer telling me he was leaving with my wife.

That is bad luck.

But grandfather say:

"It never rain every day." This is good news, guaranteed.

I bet you lunch.

Okay.

Come on.

"You are fired."

Oh, I'm... I'm sorry.

Well...

at least I won lunch.

Good philosophy. See good in bad. I like. Yeah.

- Hello. - Korben, sweetheart.

You got broken fingers? You can't punch my number?

- Hi, Mom. - Seventeen messages.

And don't tell me your machine is broken again. They last 1000 years.

Mr. Kim, you should go. This is gonna take a minute.

You don't feed your cat a croquette, who you love more than me.

- She didn't breast-feed you. I did. - Goodbye, Mr. Dallas.

Good fortune for you.

You don't have a girl. Oh, Christ, I'll never be a grandmother.

- It bring you good luck! - Yeah. Sure.

Korben, my body's failing me. You have to take me on this trip.

Ma, what are you talking about?

You wanna make your mother beg?

I don't wanna make you beg. All I want is an explanation. Look, I just got in.

I just smashed my cab. I lost my job. I got mugged.

Besides that, everything's peachy. Thanks for asking.

Now, will you just settle down and explain this to me calmly?

So you don't know you won a trip to Fhloston Paradise for two for 10 days?

And I suppose you're gonna leave me on the lunar surface to freeze my ass off.

If I'd won a trip, I'd know about it.

Somebody would've notified me.

They've been blaring your name out on the radio for the last hour, you big ape.

Ma, I'll call you back.

General Munro, how nice to see you in the 5000 block.

Nice apartment, major.

Looks like you settled into a wonderful life. Heard you lost your job.

You heard that, huh?

Well, don't worry. I'll get another job.

Don't bother. We have one for you.

"Major Dallas, you've been selected for a mission."

- What mission? - To save the world.

"You leave for Fhloston Paradise.

Retrieve four stones from the diva Plavalaguna and bring them back."

- Any questions? - Yeah. Just one. Why me?

- I retired six months ago, you remember? - Three reasons.

One, as a member of the Elite Special Forces Unit of the army...

you are an expert in the use of all necessary weapons and spacecraft.

Two, you're the most highly decorated member of your unit.

- The third? - Of all the members of your unit...

you're the only one left alive.

- You check your messages? - I've had enough good news.

Might be important.

You're a winner!

You've won the annual Gemini Contest and a trip to Fhloston Paradise for two.

Here are your tickets.

You rigged the contest?

Congratulations.

- Couldn't think of anything more discreet? - Old tricks are the best tricks.

Major lceborg will accompany you as your wife.

I am not going.

Why not?

Excuse me, general.

Who is it? Who is it?

- My wife. - You remarried?

Yes. No. I just met this girl, but I'm gonna marry her.

I love her, but she hates the military. She knows the military ruined my last marriage.

Wants nothing to do with it. If she sees you, she'll kill me.

- Major... - You gotta hide somewhere.

- You gotta help me. Hide somewhere. - We'd love to, but where can we hide?

- Major, we don't have time for this. - It's just for one minute.

You have no idea how much you're helping me.

No idea. You have no idea.

- I'm going to be happily married. - Major! Major!

- The three of us won't fit in there. - Sure you will.

Major!

You're on my foot.

Major! Major!

Leeloo: Hi.

[Cornelius appears with a handgun]

Cornelius: I'm really sorry to resort to this, Mr. Wallace...

Korben: Dallas.

Cornelius: Dallas. But We heard about your good luck and need your tickets for Fhloston.

Korben: This the way priests usually take vacations?

Cornelius: Not vacation. We're on a mission.

Korben: What kind of mission?

Cornelius: We have to save the world, my son.

Korben: You're gonna save the world?

Cornelius: Yes.

[The police officers arrive at the apartment.]

Chekov: Police! There's someone here with stolen items.

Police officer 3: We're with you soon.

[Two officers walk to a room, where a scuffle ensues. Sulu and Chekov emerge dressed in the guards uniforms.]

Sulu: Masters in disguise.

[Kirk takes a handgun.]

Cornelius: Kirk, I thought you said it wasn't loaded.

Kirk: (fires a handgun into the air) I lied. Ben! That's an order, Major.

Korben: Yes, Captain, sir.

Down there. Down there.

Yeah. Come with me.

This is a police control.

This is not an exercise.

Come on, get in here. For one minute, all right?

Just one minute. I promise.

- This is a police control. - Don't touch anything.

This is not an exercise.

Can you please spread your legs...

and place your hands in the yellow circles?

- What are you doing? - Saving you so you can save the world.

Yeah, but I...

I think this is the door. There's no name, no number.

Let's see it.

Sir, are you classified as human?

Negative. I am a meat Popsicle.

I found him.

Mr. Korben Dallas?

Sir, can you put your hands in the yellow circles, please?

Smoke you!

Wrong answer.

The police control is now terminated.

Thank you for your cooperation. Have a nice day.

Okay. We got the guy. Wasn't easy, but we bagged him.

- Thanks for the tip. - Glad to be of help, my friend.

The guy's just been arrested for uranium smuggling.

Everything's going as planned.

All I have to do is go to the airport, take his place...

and I'll be in Fhloston in less than four hours.

Don't come back without the stones.

Korben Dallas. We got him.

Perfect.

Akanit, take command.

Go to Fhloston and get the stones.

If Zorg really wants them...

he'll have to negotiate.

Revenge is at hand.

Oh, I am so sorry. Oh, I forgot about the autowash.

There's an autowash in that shower.

I'm so sorry.

Autowash.

Autowash, yes. Autowash, in the shower.

Yeah. You know, it's funny. I've met you twice today.

Both times, you've ended up in my arms.

It's my lucky day.

Lucky day.

Yeah.

Did you hear something?

Cornelius.

Autowash.

- I'm so sorry. - I don't need your help.

Sorry.

- Want a cup of coffee? Yeah. - Yes, please.

Autowash.

Coffee's not really my specialty.

But you must drink a lot of coffee, being a priest, huh?

I know, I know. I'm not proud of what I did. I had no choice.

I'll take the mission.

- Did you get them? - Yeah.

Good.

- "Leeloo Dallas." - "Multi-pass."

"Korben David Dallas." Perfect.

No, I can't possibly be your husband. I'm too old.

Now, David is...

in great shape. He'll protect you.

Now, please, go to the diva, collect the stones and meet me at the temple.

Now. Yes.

Okay.

Final call for Fhloston Paradise.

Last call for Fhloston Paradise. Hurry up.

I'm sorry.

The... The... The... The tickets.

- ID, please. - I'm sorry.

- There. - In here? All right. Right.

Thank you!

Mr. Dallas?

- Yeah. - Congratulations on winning the contest.

Oh, right. Okay.

- Sorry for the mess. - The mess?

The garbage.

Oh, right...

Made it!

I was so afraid I wasn't gonna make this flight...

so I sent David here to come and pick up my boarding pass.

Now David has to go. Thank you. Bye.

I am Korben Dallas.

Please report infractions immediately to the Spaceport.

And this is?

Leeloo Dallas. Multi-pass.

- Yeah. Leeloo... - Multi-pass.

She knows it's a multi-pass. Leeloo Dallas. My wife.

We're newlyweds. Just met. You know how it is.

Bump into each other, sparks happen... She knows it's a multi-pass.

Yeah. Anyway, we're in love.

I mean, I know she's made to be strong.

She's also so fragile, so human. You know what I mean?

- You want some more? - Yeah.

- Make that two. - Hello, David. David.

- Where's Leeloo? - She's on the plane with Mr. Dallas.

- What? - I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do.

- I thought he was gonna kill me. - But this is not possible.

Oh, this is not possible.

You want some more?

This is all my fault. I am the servant. It is my mission.

- I should never have given it to you. - I know.

- The key to the temple. - Oh, no.

Prepare for our arrival. I go to face my destiny.

Yes.

I don't wanna go to Egypt.

Thank you.

Dallas? Korben Dallas?

Yeah. That's me.

Just a minute, please.

It will take just one more minute.

We'll be right back.

Oh, Mr. Dallas, we really need you now.

Ruby Rhod is broadcasting live, and he needs you for an interview.

Miss?

Multi-pass.

Alpha Centauri, Flight 194...

Tell Aknot that plan A flopped.

- Go to plan B. - Okay.

Aliens ahead. Spread out.

Backup unit, Zone 18.

Let's go! Let's go, move!

Mr. Ruby Rhod is the biggest radio star.

It's a great honor to be on his talk show.

- He's so green. - Yes. I'm sure you're very excited.

But I'm on vacation and don't wanna be bothered.

I prefer to remain anonymous.

Korben Dallas!

Here he is! The one and only winner of the Gemini Croquette Contest.

This boy is fueled like fire, so start melting, ladies...

because the boy is hotter than hot. He's hot, hot, hot!

The right size, the right build, the right hair, the right on.

Right on, right on.

And he's got something to say to those 50 billion pairs of ears out there.

Pop it, D-man.

- Hi. - Unbelievable.

Quiver, ladies. Quiver. He's gonna set the world on fire.

Right here from 5 to 7.

You'll know everything there is to know about the D-man.

His dreams...

his desires...

his most intimates of intimates.

And from what I'm looking at, "intimate" is his middle name.

So tell me, my man, you nervous in the service?

Not really.

Freeze those knees because Korben's in the place and he's on the case.

Yesterday's frog will be tomorrow's prince...

of Fhloston Paradise!

The hotel of a thousand and one follies and lollies.

A magic fountain flow of non-stop wine, women and...

hootchie-kootchie-koo...

all night long.

Start licking your stamps, girls...

because this guy's gonna have you writing home to Mama.

Here, from 5 to 7, I'll be your voice, your tongue.

I'll be hot on the trail of the sexiest man of the year: D-man, your man...

my man.

End of transmission.

Okay, Ruby. See you tomorrow at 5.

How was it?

- It was just absolutely green. - I was touched to the core.

Green like what?

- Crystal green. - Crystal.

- Any kind of green you want. - Any green you like.

- Tree green, pond green. - Emerald.

Korben, sweetheart, what was that? It was bad! It had nothing!

No fire! No energy! No nothing! You know, I have a show to run here.

And it must pop, pop, pop!

So tomorrow, from 5 to 7...

will you please act like you have more than a two-word vocabulary?

It must be green. Okay? Okay?

Can I talk to you for a second? Can I just talk to you?

I didn't come here to play Pumba on the radio.

So tomorrow, from 5 to 7, you're gonna give yourself a hand.

- Green? - Super-green.

Dallas? Korben Dallas?

That's me.

Listen, I only have one Korben Dallas on my list, and he's checked in, okay?

That's impossible. I am Korben Dallas.

- Sorry, sir. Boarding is finished. - Hey.

Wait, wait, wait.

Wait. Hey, hey.

Hey, I need to talk to someone.

I don't believe this!

This is not an exercise. This is a police control.

- I'm sorry. I'm calm. - Put your hands in the yellow circle.

There's been a mistake.

To make your flight short, flight attendants

are switching on the sleep regulator...

which will regulate your sleeping during the flight.

Thank you.

Hi.

- You speak English now. - Yes. I learn.

Good.

Leeloo, we are not on vacation.

I'm on a very important mission. I work for some very important people.

If I hadn't come to get you, you would be in big trouble.

- Do you understand? Big trouble? - Yes.

But you, no trouble.

Me, fifth element.

Supreme being.

Me protect you.

Sleep.

- Sweet dreams, Mr. Dallas. - No, wait...

Stewardess 1: Sleep regulator operative in Zone 1, captain.

Space Plane Captain: Thank you. Zone 2, are you operative? Zone 2?

Stewardess 2: Yeah, everything's ready, captain. Mr. Rhod.

Ruby: What?

Stewardess 2: You have to assume your individual position.

Ruby: I don't want one position. I want all positions!

[Ruby ducks]

Stewardess 2: Mr. Rhod! [gasps]

- Parasites in landing gear. - Ground, you copy?

Got it. Front gear.

Hey, man, give me some heat, man!

We need some heat here, man! Get some heat!

Some heat over here, man!

Good shit, man. Put the heat over here, man!

Thank you! Thank you very much!

Come, come, come. Give me this. Give me this.

Take that.

Mr. Rhod!

You can call me Ruby.

Fueled and ready to go.

- Yep. - I'll buy you one, man.

[Zorg's office]

[Zorg picks up a phone.]

Zorg: Have you taken off already?

[Airport]

Right Arm: I'm not on the plane.

[Zorg's office]

Zorg: What?

[Airport]

Right Arm: The real Dallas took my place. I don't understand.

[Zorg's office]

Zorg: Are you making fun of me?

[Space Plane]

Ruby: No, no, no! I swear! I swear! I never felt this way before with a human.

Stewardess 2: Really?

Ruby: Yeah! (ducks)

[Airport]

Right Arm: I've tried everything, believe me. There's no other way to get on the plane.

[Cornelius sneaks aboard the passenger spaceplane]

[Space Plane]

Pilot: Ground is clear.

Captain: Roger. Ready for liftoff?

Pilot: Confirmed.

[Ruby starts unbuttoning the hooks on the stewardess' top]

Stewardess 2: Not there. No, please, not there. Oh, please. Don't!

Captain: Power pressure?

Pilot: Primed.

Captain: Protection?

Pilot: Confirmed.

Captain: Power increase.

Pilot: Ten seconds.

[Zorg's office]

Zorg: I am... a little... disappointed.

[Space Plane]

Pilot: Five...

[Zorg's office]

[Zorg starts entering a digital code]

Zorg: If there is one thing I do not like...

[Space Plane]

Pilot: Three...

[Zorg's office]

Zorg: it is to be...

[Space Plane]

Pilot: two...

[Zorg's office]

Zorg: disappointed.

[Space Plane]

Pilot: One.

[Airport]

Right Arm: Sorry, sir. This will never happen again.

[Zorg's Office]

Zorg: I know.

[Space Plane]

Pilot: Liftoff.

[Zorg pushes a button, detonating the payphone and killing the Right Arm. The stewardess screams. A thrusters fire. Wilhelm screams]

Pilot: Landing gear secure.

Captain: Roger. Checklist for light speed.

[A space plane flies into space and, then suddenly vanishes with amazing speed.]

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Kirk: Mr. Sulu, Plot a course for Fhloston.

Sulu: Course plotted for Fhloston, Captain.

KIRK: Engage warp engines.

MERA: Prepare for warp speed.

SULU: Ready, sir.

Mera: Strength in numbers?

Kirk: At least that's what we hope. Zorg must not be allowed to get the stones. All other concerns are secondary. ...You understand me?

Chekov: Yes, sir.

Kirk: Warp five.

SULU: So much for the little training cruise.

[The Enterprise warps to Fhloston.]

[Space, the Great Evil, even larger now, is sending radio wavelengths.]

[Federated Warship]

Crewman: Sir, we're finally getting something.

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Spock: Captain. Scanning a dark planet. It's sending radio wavelengths.

Kirk: What does it want with radio waves?

Uhura: Maybe it wants to make a call.

Kirk: Mera, I want to hear Evil to who.

Mera: Aye, sir.

[New York City Headquarters]

Scientist: It's sending radio wavelengths.

President: What does it want with radio waves?

Scientist: Maybe it wants to make a call.

[The phone rings.]

[Zorg's office]

Woman: Zorg's office.

[Phone pops up]

Zorg: I told you I do not wanna be disturbed.

Woman: You don't want to be disturbed except if it's Mr. Shadow... and it's Mr. Shadow on the line.

[Zorg picks up a phone.]

[Enterprise-A bridge]

Mera: I got it. I put it on speakers.

[Zorg's office]

Great Evil: It's Shadow again.

Zorg: Zorg here.

Great Evil: Am I disturbing you?

Zorg: No, no, I was just... Where are you?

[Space, a dark planet glows as it speaks]

Great Evil: Not far now.

[Zorg's office]

Zorg: Good. Good, good.

Great Evil: How are the stones?

Zorg: Fine. Fine. Just fine. I'll have the... I'll have the four stones you asked for any time now... but it wasn't easy. My costs have tripled.

Great Evil: Money is of no importance. (a blood coming from Zorg's forehead) I want the stones.

Zorg: The stones... will be here. I'll... I'll see to it personally.

Great Evil: I will be among you... SOON.

[Space]

[The dark planet's activity ceases.]

Crewman: We lost it.

General Tudor: We lost the signal.

President Lindberg: Damn! [punches his fists]

[Enterprise-A bridge]

UHURA: Transmission has been cut off. (to Mera) I made a tape of it, Mera.

MERA: Very well. (runs the tape through Spock's computer)

Zorg: [on computer] I'll have the four stones you asked for any time now... but it wasn't easy. My costs have tripled.

Great Evil: [on computer] Money is of no importance. I want the stones. [Mera rewinds, replays]

Mera: Kirk, the Great Evil is wanted the stones.

Kirk: We can't let Evil get the stones. I'll be in my quarters. I'm counting on you.

Great Evil: [on computer] I will be among you... SOON. [Mera rewinds, replays]

Captain's log, stardate 8141.6. The Enterprise had arrived at Fhloston and Major Dallas prepared to meet Diva Plavalaguna. She have the stones the Mondoshawans gave. We're waiting for Kirk to retrieve the stones after the concert.

Sulu: Captain, the space plane is about to arrive.

[The space plane exits a hyperspace.]

We've begun our descent towards Fhloston Paradise.

The local time is 3:20 p.m.

Auto-temperature is currently 85 degrees Fahrenheit.

We hope you've enjoyed your flight for today and hope to see you again soon.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to paradise.

Excuse me, dear. Excuse me. Thanks. Excuse me, please.

Parasites in the main ventilation.

Again? Don't worry. I'll get it.

Have we arrived yet?

- Yeah. - Oh, good.

We have 12 swimming pools and two on the rooftop.

All the restaurants are between Level 2 and Level 10.

The planet Fhloston has 400 beaches, all accessible until 5 p.m.

Then the airship goes higher to offer you a better view.

- Is the diva here yet? - Not yet.

Are there any tickets left for this opera? I'm a big fan.

You have a seat reserved, front row, next to Ruby Rhod!

He's so talented, don't you think? I just love him. He's so sexy.

Well, anyway, he has your ticket for the show, and he'll be here in 20 minutes.

Do you know where I can get something to wear?

- Enjoy your evening, Mr. Dallas. - Thank you.

- Hello? - You miserable bastard.

- I never should've pushed you out. - Ma?

I was in labor for days, and this is how you repay me?

I should've just gotten a robot.

Come on, Ma.

Don't "come on, Ma" me. I should be there, not you.

I need a tan. I need a cocktail.

Get the case in.

Hello, Ms. Diva. I'm Fog.

Welcome to the... I'm security. I...

Welcome to the... Tall...

- Can I talk to you for a minute? - Sure. Yeah.

- What's your name? - Fog.

Ms. Plavalaguna wants you to know how glad she is that you're here.

She will give you what you've come to get after the concert. Stay here.

You're listening to Radio Cosmos, and it is now 5 p.m.

- Helm to 108. - Yes, sir.

Helm 108!

Helm to 108.

Time to join Ruby Rhod and Korben Dallas...

the lucky winner of the Gemini Croquette Contest.

Coming at you live from Fhloston...

Paradise!

Ruby Rhod at your service with Korben and the manager of this green hotel...

and Miss Gemini Croquette in person...

and 8000 other lucksters here...

to enjoy the privilege of the unique concert of Miss Plavalaguna!

And now we enter what must be the most beautiful concert hall of all the universe!

A perfect replica of the old opera house...

but who cares?

To my right, a row of ministers, more sinisters than ministers.

To my left, Baby Ray, star of stage and screen.

He's not gonna get much out of this concert because he's stone-deaf!

To who?

And here we have Roy Von Bacon, king of laser ball.

And here, the emperor of Kodar Japhet with his lovely daughter.

"I love to sing," she recently confessed to me.

By the way, I have a recording of her talented voice.

I play the rest of the songs after the concert because right now it's time...

for Korben to say the word of the day.

Tell me, my man, you happy here in the big world?

- I find it boring, really. - Thrilled.

And now champagne!

Commercial! Commercial!

Break for 30 seconds.

Showtime.

Commander, I have a ship in trouble requesting permission to dock for repairs.

Put him in the docking garage. Inform security.

- Permission granted for one hour. - More than I need.

- Yes? - Champagne for the diva.

I'll take it.

I found it.

Get her!

It was an ambush.

If it's war they want, it's war they'll get!

Bravo! Bravo!

Bravo. Bravo.

My compliments, little lady.

Thank you for doing all the dirty work. I couldn't have done a better job myself.

Hand over the stones.

Nobody move! I'm taking over the ship!

Hands up!

Ruby! Ruby!

I know this music.

Let's change the beat.

Ladies and gentlemen, I think we're being attacked.

I don't know who they are, but they're everywhere.

I see one. They're warriors, and they're ugly.

They got big teeth, big foreheads and big ears, and they stink.

Mangalores.

The government sent me to help you. Just stay calm.

If somebody hear this, come and get me. I'm in the first row.

- You must give her the stones. - Who?

The fifth element.

The supreme being sent to Earth to save the universe.

- Leeloo? - Yes.

But she's more fragile than she seems.

She needs your help...

and your love...

or she will die.

- No, no, no. Stay with me. - Help!

If you want something done, do it yourself.

Come on, honey. You can't die. Come on. Listen to me. Wake up!

- Where are the stones? - What?

The stones. Where are the stones?

The stones.

They're not here.

The stones, where are they?

In me.

What? What?

Oh, my God. Korben. Oh, my God. Korben, Korben, another one coming.

- Korben, we should go. - One minute. Just give me a minute.

Hey, you!

I said you.

- I'm not with him. - Where's the other?

I said one minute.

- Ruby, hold this gun. - What?

What... What you want me to do?

- Come on. Put your hand on it. Got it? - Oh, my God.

- What do I do? - If he moves, squeeze the trigger.

- I don't feel right. I don't feel right. - The stones are in me.

Korben, I got a headache. Korben, this ain't me.

Ru DY...

Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.

Think he's gonna be okay?

Oh, my God. Oh, my God, Korben. Another one coming.

Shit. Three coming, Korben. Three.

Listen, you guard this with your life, or you'll look like this guy. You green?

- Green. - Super-green?

Super-green.

Is that your idea of a discreet operation?

Don't worry, sir. I know my man. He'll calm things down.

Right.

Move! Move!

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Ladies and gentlemen... Ladies and gentlemen, this is amazing.

Let me do it.

Oh, my God. Korben Dallas.

Korben, my man. Korben Dallas is in trouble.

Hey. REY!

The gun.

Give me the gun. The gun. The gun!

I'm gonna go and try to see if I can see something a little closer.

Yes, the gun. Yeah.

Thanks, Ray.

Don't shoot! Don't shoot! Don't shoot! I'm not armed!

Get up!

You've got the wrong guy! Don't shoot!

I'm not armed. I'm not armed!

- Oh, my God. - I'm on vacation. It's...

I'm on... Don't shoot me, please. I'm on a vacation. I won a...

contest.

Gemini Croquette's to Fhloston Paradise.

Down.

- Wait a minute. Wait a minute. - Get down!

- He's trying to say something to me. - Get down!

Okay.

Sorry. Sorry, my man.

Sorry.

Korben. Korben.

Where are you, man?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God. Oh, Korben.

They're coming. Korben, they're coming.

Korben!

- Don't move. - What?

- What you doing? - Count to 10.

- Korben, was that a bomb? - What? Shut up and count!

One, two, three, four, five...

six, seven, eight...

nine...

Ten.

I am very disappointed!

Korben. Korben, what are you looking for?

Control room.

- This is it. - I'll be over here.

Let's go! Let's go!

Quiet! Quiet!

- You in charge? - Yeah.

How many of them are out there?

- I don't know. - Let's count.

Seven on the left. Five on the right.

Four on the right. Two on the left.

Find the leader. They won't fight without the leader.

One more shot, and we start killing hostages.

- That's the leader. - Send someone to negotiate.

L... I... I... I've never negotiated. I...

You mind if I try?

No, no. Sure, sure. Sure.

We're sending somebody in to negotiate!

Anybody else wanna negotiate?

Where did he learn to negotiate like that?

I wonder.

Where's Ruby?

I thought he was dead.

Master!

It was nothing, really. It was just a helping hand.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is Ruby Rhod...

still alive.

What's wrong with you? It hurt!

Korben, I realize that you must be pretty mad at me...

but know that I am fighting for a noble cause.

Yes, you're trying to save the world. I remember.

- Right now, I'm trying to save Leeloo. - Leeloo's in trouble?

When is Leeloo not in trouble?

- There. Where is that? - That's the diva's suite.

Leeloo.

Leeloo.

Hang on.

All right, here, come on. How do you get yourself into these positions?

Come on.

Yeah, I'm here. It's all right. It's all right. Everything's okay now.

Listen.

I got the stones. All right? Just take it easy. All right?

My man, my man, my man, what's this thing with all these numbers?

It's... It's... It's...

No, no, no.

Because if it was a bomb...

the alarms would go off because all these hotels have bomb detectors. Right?

This is a Type A alert.

For security reasons, the hotel must be evacuated.

- Please proceed calmly to the lifeboats... - Stay calm!

Located in the main hallways.

Please, stay calm!

- Look out! - Korben. Korben, my man.

You know how to stop this, right?

Korben?

Two minutes to complete evacuation.

- Get back! - Evacuation! Evacuation!

Sorry, sir, you can't stay here. There's a bomb in the hotel.

I know.

- I don't want to die. - Please, my son.

- I don't want to die. - Get in.

One minute to total evacuation.

This one.

Forty-five seconds.

Get her strapped in.

Korben, Korben, my man, you know how to fly this thing?

Just like driving a cab.

But how we gonna get out the door?

Fifteen seconds.

Ten, nine, eight...

seven, six, five...

For the honor.

Oh, no.

You should hold on.

Like driving a cab.

Ladies and gentlemen, it is now 7 p.m. Time for the news.

See you tomorrow for a new adventure.

End of transmission.

That's the best show I ever did.

Mr. President, Major Dallas has the five elements on board...

and the priest is guiding them directly to the temple.

We're saved.

The diva said that I should take care of you.

Humans act so strange.

What do you mean?

Everything you created...

is used to destroy.

Yeah.

We call it human nature. You learn about that on your screen?

I'm not finished yet.

I'm up to V.

V is good.

Some very good words in V.

Like what?

Valiant.

Vulnerable.

Very beautiful.

Yes!

Yes.

Oh, of course, Munro!

- Mr. President? - Yes, now what?

I... I...

We have a problem.

[The Great Evil flies and the Federated Warship chase it.]

- What do you mean, it's advancing? - Not only advancing...

it's moving at incredible speed. We're having trouble following it.

And do you have any idea where it's heading?

Korben, there's a general on the phone.

I'll give you to the president.

Major Dallas, I, first, would like to salute a warrior.

You're a shining example of this army's might.

- Mr. President... - In the name of the Federation...

Any idea when you're gonna be getting to the point?

Okay. There's a ball of fire 1200 miles in diameter heading straight for Earth...

and we have no idea how to stop it. That's the problem.

How much time do we have?

If its speed remains constant, in an hour and 57 minutes.

I'll call you back in two hours.

Hello?

Hello? Hello?

They just landed in the desert.

Good job, David.

- Put her in the center. - Where? Here?

- You got it figured out, Father? - This one should be fire.

- You know how this works? - Theoretically, yes.

The four stones should go around. The fifth element should be in the middle...

and then the weapon against evil should work.

- You've never seen this work before? - No.

Every weapon has a manual. I'm sure this has one too.

That's it. That's it. Match up the symbols. Go! Go!

Wind.

My man, what you doing?

- What? - What you doing?

Trying to keep you in the DJ business.

Fire.

Done.

- So, what happens now? - So now, we have to open them.

- And you know how to do that. Right? - Theoretically...

No.

Leeloo, wake up, honey. Wake up. You have to help us.

Leeloo, how do you open these stones?

Wind blows.

Fire burns.

Yes. Yes, I know all that. But how do you open these stones?

Rain...

falls.

What?

Leeloo. Leeloo.

What does it mean?

I think that...

- Maybe it's a charade. - What?

A game or something.

If we don't get these stones open in five minutes, we're all dead.

- Dead? - Yes, dead.

Too late.

- We've lost contact with them. - Three minutes.

I think mine is broken. Why I gotta get the broke one?

We're never gonna make it.

Korben. Korben, it moved!

- What'd you do? Show me what you did. - Nothing.

Shut up, shut up!

Shut up! Calm down. Show me what you did, step by step.

- I was just standing here. - Quickly.

Okay, and I put my hands on the top like this, and I said:

"We're not gonna make it."

And that's it?

Korben. Korben, my man.

Wind.

She said, "Wind blows."

Everyone take a stone.

Water for water. Fire for fire. Earth for earth. Go, now.

Earth.

- Open the other one. - Okay.

Korben?

Korben, my man, I have no fire.

I mean, I have no matches. You have any matches?

I stopped smoking. If I knew... Father, you smoke?

Give me some... Got some matches? Matches? We need some fire.

We gonna die.

Don't breathe.

Fire.

One minute.

Let's go. Let's go, Leeloo.

Wake up. Wake up. It's time for you to work now.

Protect life...

- until death. - No.

No! Leeloo, Leeloo, listen to me! Listen to me. Listen.

Listen, I know you're very tired. I know you're very tired.

I'll take you on a vacation when we're done. A real vacation, just you and me.

But listen to me, if you don't do something right now, we'll all die.

What's the use of saving life when you see what you do with it?

It'll be entering the atmosphere in 40 seconds.

Leeloo, you're right, you're right, you're right. But there are some things...

Very nice things worth saving, some beautiful things.

Beautiful things.

Like love?

Yes. Yes, love. That's good. That's good.

That's a good example. Like love. Love is worth saving.

I don't know love.

I don't know love.

I was built to protect, not to love.

So there's no use for me other than this.

No, no, no, you're wrong. You're wrong. You're wrong.

I need you. I need you, very much.

Why?

Because...

Because...

Tell her, Korben.

Tell me. Please.

Why do you need me?

- Because... - Tell me.

- Tell me. - Because I...

Because I love you.

I love you.

Ten, nine, eight, seven...

six, five, four, three...

two, one.

Scanner imaging has confirmed the dark planet dead.

The planet seems to have stopped at 62 miles from impact.

Yes!

What's wrong with you? What you screaming for?

Every five minutes, there's something, a bomb or something.

I'm leaving.

Mr. President.

Let me introduce Professor Mactilburgh who runs the center.

It's an honor, Mr. President.

Where are my two heroes?

Well, they were so tired from their ordeal, we put them in the reactor.

I have 19 more meetings after this.

Yeah. I'm sorry. Let me see if they're revived.

Thank you.

We go live in one minute, Mr. President.

They're...

not ready.

They need...

- five more minutes. - You have 20 seconds.

No, ma'am. No. No, no, I tried. No, ma'am.

- Who's that? - Some woman.

- Claims to be Korben's mother. - Well, give it here.

Mrs. Dallas, this is the president. On behalf of the Federation...

That doesn't even sound like him.

The president's an idiot. You don't sound like an idiot.

Don't wanna talk to your mother, avoid me like usual.

I'll just throw myself in traffic. I'll just Saran Wrap myself to the bed and...