WikiViews/Incredibles 3/The Great Return

Noah: Home at last. God, haven't been here forever. I hope COVID-19 didn't wreck Nolan or Dillon or anyone else.

* Noah notices the room is empty*

Noah: What the fuck happened here? Have I really been gone for THAT long?

Dillon: Fuck yeah.

* Noah notices Incredibles 3 on the TV.*

Noah: THEY MADE AN INCREDIBLES 3!?! What, I've been gone for 28 years?

Dillon: Five hundred and sixty nine.

Noah: Whatever. Is it any good? I liked Incredibles 2 enough but didn't quite reach the heights of the first film.

Dillon: Let's see.

* 2 HOURS LATER*

Noah: (after silence) What the fuck was that?

Dillon: Dog shit.

* We cut to clips of the film.*

Noah: (VO) Incredibles 3... what the fuck happened? They went from one of the greatest films in Pixar's entire catalog, to a flawed but entertaining sequel, to a fucking poorly written piece of shit!

Dillon: (VO) So let's see how this piece of shit goes.

* The film starts.*

Noah: So it starts off with Mr. Incredible coming home from a long day of work.

''Mr. Incredible: Oh my God, this day... it was tough!''

* Elastigirl appears.*

''Elastigirl: You need to be a bit more... flexible.''

* Mr. Incredible laughs pervertedly. Let's Get it On by Marvin Gaye plays as we see Mr. Incredible and Elastigirl making out.*

Noah: (VO) So then Elastigirl stretches all the way so that Mr. Incredible's ding-dong can-

* The clips stop before they become NSFW.*

Noah: Wait, isn't this supposed to be a kids' movie? Why the fuck is this being shown?

Dillon: It is an animated movie! Are everyone perverts?

* They think for a moment.*

Dillon: Wait a minute... let me see the DVD box.

* Noah hands it over.*

Dillon: N-Noah! This isn't Incredibles 3, this is Mr. Incredible's Totally Wicked Sex Tape or whatever!

Noah: HOW THE FUCK DID THAT GET IN HERE? Who bought that?

* Nolan walks away slowly*

Noah: NOLAN! (runs over to him) EXPLAIN THIS!

Nolan: Uh..... I'm horny?

Noah: Okay, we'll you're going back to wherever the hell you bought this and you're selling it. GOT IT?

Nolan: yes.

Noah: (Walking back to the couch) Okay, so let's actually watch Incredibles 3.

(They turn it on)

Noah: (VO) So it starts off with... the Underminer drilling through the ground. Guess I'll give 'em some credit for resolving that from Incredibles 2.

Underminer: Mr. Incredible will be no match for my Dynamic Dynamite Destroyer!

Noah: (VO) Oh yeah, they better show Bomb Voyage as well or else-

Bomb Voyage: (In a strong French accent) ''I will be of assistance! Me and that man have unfinished business!''

Dillon: This is weird.

Noah: How did he even end up here? Oh wait, I forgot-

* NEVER EXPLAINED flashes.*