Hooligan Attacks

Script:

'''INT. LENNOPA - AFTERNOON'''

Wimpy Janitor GREG ZIFF BONDS is arguing with loving Student RAYMEN DYLAN ENGLAND. ZIFF tries to hug DYLAN but he shakes him off. ZIFF Please Dylan, don't leave me. DYLAN I'm sorry Ziff, but I'm looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away. ZIFF I am such a person! DYLAN frowns. DYLAN I'm sorry, Ziff. I just don't feel excited by this relationship anymore. DYLAN leaves.

ZIFF sits down, looking defeated.

Moments later, special scout ELENOR RORY COMBS barges in looking flustered. ZIFF Goodness, Rory! Is everything okay? RORY I'm afraid not. ZIFF What is it? Don't keep me in suspense... RORY It's ... a hooligan ... I saw an evil hooligan Destroy a bunch of Children! ZIFF Defenseless Children? RORY Yes, defenseless Children! ZIFF Bloomin' heck, Rory! We've got to do something. RORY I agree, but I wouldn't know where to start. ZIFF You can start by telling me where this happened. RORY I was... RORY fans herself and begins to wheeze. ZIFF Focus Rory, focus! Where did it happen? RORY Tennessee! That's right - Tennessee! ZIFF springs up and begins to run.

'''EXT. A ROAD - CONTINUOUS'''

ZIFF rushes along the street, followed by RORY. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

'''INT. TENNESSEE - SHORTLY AFTER'''

PHIL MAUDRE a peculiar hooligan Threatens two Children.

ZIFF, closely followed by RORY, rushes towards PHIL, but suddenly stops in his tracks. RORY What is is? What's the matter? ZIFF That's not just any old hooligan, that's Phil Maudre! RORY Who's Phil Maudre? ZIFF Who's Phil Maudre? Who's Phil Maudre? Only the most peculiar hooligan in the universe! RORY Blinkin' knickers, Ziff! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most peculiar hooligan in the universe! ZIFF You can say that again. RORY Blinkin' knickers, Ziff! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most peculiar hooligan in the universe! ZIFF I'm going to need Sword of Souls, lots of Sword of Souls. Phil turns and sees Ziff and Rory. He grins an evil grin. PHIL Ziff Bonds, we meet again. RORY You've met? ZIFF Yes. It was a long, long time ago... '''EXT. A PARK - BACK IN TIME'''

A young ZIFF is sitting in a park listening to some Jazz music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over him.

He looks up and sees PHIL. He takes off his headphones. PHIL Would you like some peppermints? ZIFF's eyes light up, but then he studies PHIL more closely, and looks uneasy. ZIFF I don't know, you look kind of peculiar. PHIL Me? No. I'm not peculiar. I'm the least peculiar hooligan in the world. ZIFF Wait, you're a hooligan? ZIFF runs away, screaming.

'''INT. TENNESSEE - PRESENT DAY''' PHIL You were a coward then, and you are a coward now. RORY (To ZIFF) You ran away? ZIFF (To RORY) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do? ZIFF turns to PHIL. ZIFF I may have run away from you then, but I won't run away this time! ZIFF runs away.

He turns back and shouts. ZIFF I mean, I am running away, but I'll be back - with Sword of Souls. PHIL I'm not scared of you. ZIFF You should be. '''INT. FOREST OF TIME - LATER THAT DAY'''

ZIFF and RORY walk around searching for something. ZIFF I feel sure I left my Sword of Souls somewhere around here. RORY Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly Sword of Souls. ZIFF You know nothing Rory Combs. RORY We've been searching for ages. I really don't think they're here. Suddenly, PHIL appears, holding a pair of Sword of Souls. PHIL Looking for something? RORY Crikey, Ziff, he's got your Sword of Souls. ZIFF Tell me something I don't already know! RORY The earth's circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km. ZIFF I know that already! RORY I still wear nappies. PHIL (appalled) Dude! While PHIL is looking at RORY with disgust, ZIFF lunges forward and grabs his deadly Sword of Souls. He wields them, triumphantly. ZIFF Prepare to die, you peculiar Tomato! PHIL No please! All I did was Destroy a bunch of Children! DYLAN enters, unseen by any of the others. ZIFF I cannot tolerate that kind of behaviour! Those Children were defenceless! Well now they have a defender - and that's me! Ziff Bonds defender of innocent Children. PHIL Don't hurt me! Please! ZIFF Give me one good reason why I shouldn't use these Sword of Souls on you right away! PHIL Because Ziff, I am your father. ZIFF looks stunned for a few moments, but then collects himself. ZIFF No you're not! PHIL Ah well, it had to be worth a try. PHIL tries to grab the Sword of Souls but ZIFF dodges out of the way. ZIFF Who's the daddy now? Huh? Huh? Unexpectedly, PHIL slumps to the ground. RORY Did he just faint? ZIFF I think so. Well that's disappointing. I was rather hoping for a more dramatic conclusion, involving my deadly Sword of Souls. ZIFF crouches over PHIL's body. RORY Be careful, Ziff. It could be a trick. ZIFF No, it's not a trick. It appears that... It would seem... Phil Maudre is dead! ZIFF What? ZIFF Yes, it appears that I scared him to death. RORY claps her hands. RORY So your Sword of Souls did save the day, after all. DYLAN steps forward. DYLAN Is it true? Did you kill the peculiar hooligan? ZIFF Dylan how long have you been...? DYLAN puts his arm around ZIFF. DYLAN Long enough. ZIFF Then you saw it for yourself. I killed Phil Maudre. DYLAN Then the Children are safe? ZIFF It does seem that way! A crowd of vulnerable Children enter, looking relived. DYLAN You are their hero. The Children bow to ZIFF. ZIFF There is no need to bow to me. I seek no worship. The knowledge that Phil Maudre will never Destroy Children ever again, is enough for me. DYLAN You are humble as well as brave! One of the Children passes ZIFF a healing necklace DYLAN I think they want you to have it, as a symbol of their gratitude. ZIFF I couldn't possibly. Pause. ZIFF Well, if you insist. ZIFF takes the necklace. ZIFF Thank you. The Children bow their heads once more, and leave.

ZIFF turns to DYLAN. ZIFF Does this mean you want me back? DYLAN Oh, Ziff, of course I want you back! ZIFF smiles for a few seconds, but then looks defiant. ZIFF Well you can't have me. DYLAN WHAT? ZIFF You had no faith in me. You had to see my scare a hooligan to death before you would believe in me. I don't want a lover like that. DYLAN But... ZIFF Please leave. I want to spend time with the one person who stayed with me through thick and thin - my best friend, Rory. RORY grins. DYLAN But... RORY You heard the gentleman. Now be off with you. Skidaddle! Shoo! DYLAN Ziff? ZIFF I'm sorry Dylan, but I think you should skidaddle. DYLAN leaves.

RORY turns to ZIFF. RORY Did you mean that? You know ... that I'm your best friend? ZIFF Of course you are! The two walk off arm in arm.

Suddenly RORY stops. RORY When I said you were my love interest, you know I was just trying to distract the hooligan don't you?

ZIFF

Of course i'm just a janitor i know your interested in Dylan

RORY

* Blushes* you do ? oh well its just a secret between friends

(then they walk way Hooking arms)

THE END