Avenue Q (Toonwriter's fan fiction series)

Avenue Q is a series based on the musical of the same name, and just like that, it is a parody of PBS's Sesame Street. The series begins after a film based on the musical, which takes place after. The series also takes place after Meet the Feebles and The Happytime Murders, and it features characters from those two films and Fritz's Funporium. It also features characters from ended shows and canceled shows.

Characters
✍ = Needs some major designing help (in terms of not being a recolor, another item, etc.) 😈 = Villain(s)

Puppet characters

 * Princeton
 * Kate Monster
 * Nicky
 * Rod
 * Ricky
 * Trekkie Monster
 * Lucy the Slut
 * Julian (formerly known as the Newcomer, named after the Julliard School of Music)
 * The Bad Idea Bears😈
 * Mrs. Lavinia Thistletwat😈
 * Hillary Clinton
 * Mitt Romney
 * Donald Trump😈
 * Mike Pence😈
 * Cinderelmo (Avenue Q OC; The Elmo of Avenue Q, Princeton & Kate Monster's adopted son; Identical twin lookalike of Elmo- Like Prince and the Pauper, except both Elmo and Cinderelmo are common)
 * Ginger (Avenue Q OC; Princeton & Kate Monster's adopted daughter; needs a design to look just like how her original puppet is)✍
 * Harvey (Avenue Q OC; Cinderelmo's identical twin friend; polar opposite, because his fur is blue)
 * Excalibird (Avenue Q OC; The Big Bird of Avenue Q; like the Blue Bird of Happiness in "Follow That Bird")✍
 * Barnaby Snufflestiltskin (Avenue Q OC; A red-furred Snuffleupagus with black spots; the Snuffy of Avenue Q)
 * Tilly Snufflestiltskin (Avenue Q OC; Barnaby's little sister; the Alice of Avenue Q)
 * Cookie Marshal (Avenue Q OC; The Cookie Monster of Avenue Q, an officer of the law; courtesy of "Cookie Monster" from Cartoon Network's "MAD's" Cookie Blue)
 * Alys (Avenue Q OC; The Abby Cadabby of Avenue Q; A goth version of Abby in the same clothes as Alice, Ala Abby in Wonderland/American McGee's Alice)
 * Angelita (Avenue Q OC; The Rosita of Avenue Q)
 * Snugly: One of Cinderelmo's pets; A red baby worm. He's called Snugly because he loves to snuggle friendly folks affectionately.
 * Wiggly: Snugly's brother and another one of Cinderelmo's pets; A green baby worm. He's called that because he loves to wiggle in place when it comes to exercising.
 * Princess Joan (Avenue Q OC; The Zoe of Avenue Q; a Princess)✍
 * Henry Monster (Avenue Q OC; The Herry Monster of Avenue Q)
 * Terry (Avenue Q OC; The Telly of Avenue Q)
 * Russell (Avenue Q OC; The Grover of Avenue Q)✍
 * Alcindor von Count (Avenue Q OC; The Count of Avenue Q)
 * Franco (Avenue Q OC; The Frazzle of Avenue Q)
 * Trevor the Grouch: The only Grouch that always shows kindness. Trevor was cast out from his family for being nice, and the grouch handbook says "Article 12, section 3: A Grouch shall never admit to being nice or helpful, as it contrasts to their morals." Trevor is friends with almost everyone, but he does not like bad people like the Bad Idea Bears, Gordon the Gecko or others. He loves trash, yet he also likes things normal people do, and he does not want to see a dirty, polluted environment enveloping the whole world, so he would rather see litter all thrown away inside trash cans like his. Ever since he had a trash can of his own, he made it a luxurious home for him. Trevor sees Dead End Grouch as a major nemesis. (Avenue Q OC; Courtesy of and recycled from the White Oscar the Grouch from Elmo's Coloring Book)
 * ALF: ALF is an alien from the planet Melmac who has arrived on planet Earth. ALF's real name is Gordon Shumway, but he was given the nickname "ALF" (an acronym for "Alien Life Form"), by Willie Tanner in the pilot episode of his former series. ALF was born on October 28, 1756, on the Lower East Side of the planet. He is troublesome, sarcastic, and cynical. ALF is generally regarded as one of the only Melmacians to survive his home planet's cataclysm. As his species does, he considers cats a delicacy. ALF moved to Avenue Q because he was despaired in not only having his classic series left on a cliffhanger, but his planned reboot series announced by Warner Bros. was canceled. In Avenue Q, he became friends with almost everyone but the villains.
 * Spamela Hamderson (Technical Avenue Q OC; Moving directly from the Muppets)
 * Gordon the Gecko (Technical Avenue Q OC; courtesy of a Robot Chicken segment)😈
 * Dead End Grouch: An evil grouch with the ability to turn into a feral monster when he gets really angry. He got that ability after pledging to the devil. Ever since then, he became loyal to Bletchinator, loving his grouchiness. He is the only being other than Trekkie Monster to love and masturbate to the infamous "2 Girls 1 Cup" video. Design recycled from a Muppet-like Grinch puppet.😈
 * Kute: An evil mutant clone of Elmo with the powers of a devil. He became one of Bletchinator's loyal bodyguards after his creation. (Avenue Q OC)😈
 * Smokey the Bear (Semi-Avenue Q OC)
 * McGruff the Crime Dog (Semi-Avenue Q OC)
 * Scruff (Semi-Avenue Q OC)
 * Cookie Mongoloid: The Cookie Mongoloid is the blue and black sheep of the family that spawned that more famous cookie fanatic, Cookie Monster. Growing up in the shadow of his beloved cousin, watching the lovable good-natured monster rise effortlessly to stardom, the maladjusted Cookie Mongoloid grew despondent and bitter... Living in San Francisco's wretched skid row 6th Street on a diet of freebased cookie bits, the Mongoloid was a far cry from the cheerful star of children's television. Inspired by "Mongoloid", Devo's anthem of alienation and mutation, Loid convinced Cookie to channel his angst and obsessive nature into a compelling musical endeavor. (Avenue Q OC; The same "Sesame Speed Metal" band based from San Francisco)
 * Bozar the Grouch (Avenue Q OC; A grey Grouch with the personality of Oliver & Company's Francis- lover of drama and exquisite taste- and a hint of grouchiness)✍
 * Twitchy Monster: At a young age, Twitchy was arrested on multiple drug and vandalism charges and sentence to a particularly harsh prison term. With nobody to visit him, he withdrew into himself and his artwork. He learned to tattoo in prison from one of the few goodhearted inmates there (who also helped to pull him out of a particularly bad incident in that prison that Twitchy does not like to talk about. Prison was good for him in that it got him clean, but a good deal of the damage has already been done. Upon getting out of prison, Twitchy moved to Avenue Q partially because he was low on cash and partially because he'd heard that monsters were pretty well accepted (or at least tolerated) there. Thankfully, he didn't have any trouble getting into his apartment and is keeping his head above water working as a tattoo artist and has been commissioned to do a mural on the side of Gary's building (in lieu of rent).
 * Trish: Trish grew up in a rich political family. Her parents were usually busy with the latest campaign and schmoozing with various voters. Trish grew into a life where she could have nearly anything she wanted (materially) coupled with almost no restrictions. As a result, she fell into her parents crowd and fell into drug use because of easy access to party drugs and no restrictions from them. Eventually, Trish realized for herself that her life was spiraling out of control and she checked herself into rehab. There she first met Twitchy. After getting out of rehab, she knew that the one place that would only lead her back down the path of where she didn't want to be was with her parents. She chose to "disappear" and chose to live in anonymity at Avenue Q. She didn't have a lot of personal money, but she did have trained skills as a hairdresser and so she began her business out of her apartment. Soon after she moved to Avenue Q, Trish reconnected with Twitchy (living there as well) and they began dating. She's also heard that her father sent a private investigator to look for her, but so far, he's not come to Avenue Q yet…
 * Chef Flambé: Also known as Pierre Flambé. Pierre was born into a French family rich in culinary history and reputation. He grew up in the kitchen and was sent to the finest cooking schools from a young age. He might be still in France running his own restaurant if it wasn't for the fact he developed a taste for American cuisine. When he began to show this taste in his cooking, he was thrown out of and refused entry to every cooking school in France. His parents, outraged at his "betrayal of his family and national heritage", disowned him. With nothing else to lose, Pierre immigrated to America and worked in diners and greasy spoons until he could finish his culinary degree and afford the food truck that has now become known as "Grill or Be Grilled". Chef Flambé's first customers ever, when he arrived on Avenue Q, were Twitchy Monster and Trish, who just stopped by for a quick bite.  Entranced by the food (but underwhelmed by the design on the outside of the truck) Twitchy offered to give him a custom paint job and allowed him to pay him in free meals.  A combination of that eye-catching paint job, the reasonable prices, the fantastic food, and the generous and friendly personality of Flambé himself made the Grill or Be Grilled truck an instant success.  As word spread, Flambé became something of an Avenue Q institution.  He can usually be found wherever he's parked and even if he's hard to find, he always has a "blip" on his website to show where he's parked and open for business. Flambe has a rather thick French accent and sometimes simply goes on in French, so is difficult to understand at times. (Bit of a homage to the Swedish Chef.)
 * "Mama Bear" Becky: Becky grew up in the same rich political family as her younger sister Trish. She had many of the same experiences. However, she rebelled earlier and more publicly. She started riding motorcycles, getting into trouble, seeing boys that her father didn't approve of.  Finally, she interrupted a political speech he was giving by roaring up on her Harley, telling her old man where he could shove his politics, and then roaring off with what few possessions she could tuck into her saddlebags, not to be seen again. She only gave contact information to her sister, telling her not to give it to her parents. She and Trish have been in contact (albeit more or less secret contact) ever since. She's only visiting Avenue Q for now, but she may extend her visit for a little while to catch up with her sister (and to meet that cute little Chef Flambé she's talked about.) Although Becky was out of state when Trish hit rock bottom, it was her phone call that encouraged Trish to go to rehab. Other than that, there's been so many experiences on the road. She'll have to write her own memoirs one of these days…
 * Big Jaws (Technical Avenue Q OC; courtesy of Family Guy)😈
 * Composite Santa (Technical Avenue Q OC; courtesy of Robot Chicken)😈
 * Robot Chicken (Technical Avenue Q OC)
 * Robot Chicken's girlfriend (Technical Avenue Q OC)
 * Ricky Recycle Bin (Technical Avenue Q OC; Made precisely out of a "Grouchmo" puppet)
 * Ray the Owl (Avenue Q OC; The Hoots of Avenue Q; a white owl)
 * Rose: Princeton's cousin.
 * Roberta: Rod's twin sister. She and Nicky became lovers while she supports her brother and Ricky's gay marriage.
 * Rachel: Nicky's sister.
 * Cody, the Homeland Security Chameleon: Cody is bug-eyed because he's trying to stay alert for potential terrorist threats! He changes color depending on the national threat level. He turns bright red whenever he sees Donald Trump.
 * Winoceros: Bozar the Grouch's neighbor. A tipsy, fun-loving, homeless rhino. He begs for spare change, swigs peppermint Schnapps, and sings sea shanties that keep Bozar up all night long! It's yo ho ho and a bottle of fun! Children will be comforted when Wino shouts that he loves them - although he tends to say that to everybody!
 * The Notorious B.I.G. Bird: From the rough south side of Avenue Q, The Notorious B.I.G. Bird is a street-tough rapper who "drops mad knowledge" on children. His lessons include the importance of exercise (dangling a record executive out of the window to keep those biceps toned) and the value of money (knowing that Courvoisier is less expensive than Cristal and that a 40 of malt liquor is more frugal than both)!😈
 * Botox the Ostrich: Botox the Ostrich is actually 72 years old! But thanks to countless injections of botulism toxins, nose jobs, facelifts, tummy tucks, chemical peels, and liposuction, she doesn't look a day over 68! Botox teachers kids that we should all be happy with who we are - just as soon as the cosmetic surgeons have done their work!
 * Red Crab
 * Blue Crab
 * Dr. Scientist
 * Freddy Freebase: "Oh, fuck!" moans the incorrigible Freddy Freebase as he waddles down the back alleys of Avenue Q, looking for a fix. There's not much he won't do to score some rocks - shoplifting from Mr. Carter's store, robbing kids at knifepoint, even sponge-bathing Bozar the Grouch! Joining Freddy on all his adventures is Pippy, his magical singing crackpipe.😈
 * Pippy: Freddy's magical singing crackpipe.😈
 * Avery Dalton Dartmouth ("A.D.D." for short): Avenue Q characters are known for their high levels of energy, but few can compete with A.D.D.'s hyperactivity! He bounces up and down Avenue Q teaching kids about history...before quickly losing interest and switching to reading skills...then shifting to math, English, flailing his arms, yelling, and banging his head against the wall. The only way Avery's friends can calm him down is with dangerously high doses of Ritalin!
 * The 'Countant: The Count's less arithmetic-obsessed but business-savvy cousin. Kids can now learn to count from The 'Countant, a convicted former Arthur Andersen employee who fulfills his community service sentence by teaching math from his castle in Transylvania (really a minimum-security prison in Pennsylvania)! When do two dollars plus two dollars equal ten million dollars? When you use the 'Countant's "aggressive" accounting methods!😈
 * Easy: No stranger to Avenue Q's Planned Parenthood Clinic, Easy learned the hard way that when her boyfriend said he'd love her forever, he only meant until she ballooned up bigger than Barkley the Dog! As a preventative tool to teach kids about not ruining their lives before homeroom is over, Easy sings the song, "Rubber Condom" to the tune of "Rubber Duckie". (Avenue Q OC; Prairie Dawn if she were like Bonnie from Family Guy, ya know 'cause Bonnie was like pregnant for like six seasons)
 * Charlie Sheen (Avenue Q version)
 * Rap Rat: Formerly from the infamous VHS board game of the same name. He is a supernatural rat puppet character who used to appear in a demonic video that, when put in a VHS player, would start off with a normal conversation, but then show graphic images of what the viewer(s) currently fears. Rap Rat is also known to give the viewers vivid and disturbing nightmares after watching the tape. Thanks to the Bletchinator, Rap Rat was brought to life, no longer in a videotape, now a part of the evil villains.😈
 * Dollar Sign (formerly from Wonder Showzen)😈
 * Devils (formerly from Wonder Showzen)😈
 * Bastinda: A modern wicked witch who is also a pop singer. Unlike many witches, Bastinda is known for riding on a motorcycle, both on land and in the air. Her mannerisms are similar to those of the Wicked Witch of the West in the Muppets' Wizard of Oz. In fact, she has karate skills like her, yet she also has black magic.😈
 * Fritz: Titular star of Fritz's Funporium. Fritz is a hooch-swigging, child-hating, serial-dating puppet monster who was sentenced to do children's television as community service after his third arrest for public drunkenness, indecent exposure and overt breach of livestock. More often than not, he's positively plastered, but children absolutely adore him. Fritz is considered to be personally responsible for driving his show's eight previous showrunners insane. Lovely guy, really. Good with kids.
 * Butler: Canine co-star of Fritz's Funporium. Butler is a multiple-instrument-playing, calm, pragmatic, likable Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever. Butler is obsessed with gastronomy, scotch, balls, and squirrels. He serves as the rather questionable moral center of the puppets who work at the Funporium.
 * Gracie: Co-star of Fritz's Funporium. Fritz's perpetually bubbly costar Gracie is a puppet with a good heart who honestly likes her job entertaining children. She's a puppet of conviction who stands up for the rights of her felted brethren without regard for her own reputation. Gracie is in a cross-species relationship with the show's cameraman, Brian ("Small Fry").
 * Pat: Pat is a bumbling, happy, cheerful "Mallard Bastard" puppet duck whose on-screen and off-screen personas are very much in-line with each other. Pat's actual gender is unknown, and no one really knows if Pat is even on payroll… He/She/It just showed up, one day. Pat only quacks (rarely on cue) and has the nasty habit of setting things on fire, chewing on live wires, and taking a dump in the costume rack.
 * Enrique & Trip: Fritz's Funporium's wise-cracking teamsters.
 * Phil Phillips (from The Happytime Murders)
 * Sandra Jakoby White: Back as a Nazi Zombie, Sandra wanted revenge on Phil and Detective Edwards for her demise. She's the only Nazi Zombie to not look hideous or rotten, perfect to keep her sexy figure, enough to become lovers with Kute, who loves her for not only her figure, but also who she is and everything else about her.😈
 * Heidi the Hippo (from Meet the Feebles)
 * Huxtable the Hippo (Meet the Feebles OC; a thin red hippo with self-esteem issues)
 * Sid the Elephant (from Meet the Feebles)
 * Seymour the Elechicken (from Meet the Feebles)
 * Robert the Hedgehog (from Meet the Feebles)
 * Lucille the Poodle (from Meet the Feebles)
 * Arthur the Worm (from Meet the Feebles)
 * Tribble-like Creatures (from Meet the Feebles)
 * Madame Bovine (from Meet the Feebles)
 * Bletchinator (Bletch from Meet the Feebles, back from the dead as a killer cyborg)😈
 * Samantha (from Meet the Feebles, back from the dead as a killer cyborg)😈
 * Sebastian the Fox: From Meet the Feebles; One of the survivors of the Feeble Variety Massacre. Unfortunately for him, he was killed by the serpent who bit him with his poisonous fangs and then devoured him.😈
 * Toxie Jr.: Toxic Avenger and Sarah's beloved son.
 * Audrey II: An evil and boisterous flytrap-like extraterrestrial plant with plans to take over the planet. Thanks to a surviving bud in the garden, Audrey II is back with a vengeance. Voiced by Michael-Leon Wooley.😈
 * Weldon the Internet Troll (Steve Whitmire): He's a friendly rival of Trekkie and a professional internet troll. He moved to Avenue Q, due to his performer being fired from the Muppets. (I heard that Rick hates Steve now, Steve trolling the ever-loving heck outta Rick would be funny XD)

More coming soon (Suggestions are welcome)...

Humans

 * Brian: "A laid-back guy engaged to Christmas Eve."
 * Christmas Eve: "A therapist who moved here from Japan."
 * Gary Coleman: "Yes, that Gary Coleman. He lives on the Avenue, too. He's the superintendent."
 * Lucky (played by ???): A melancholy movie star who wants nothing more than to have a little fun. (The very same Lucky from the Britney Spears song of the same name)
 * Sportacus (played by Magnus Scheving): Since LazyTown ended, Sportacus actually became a real superhero as a result of an event giving him real superpowers to add to his athleticism.
 * Stephanie (played by Julianna Rose Mauriello): Since LazyTown ended, Stephanie became a very attractive bisexual 18-year-old adult (yet her complexion never looked a year over 13) while still looking like a busty version of her usual self from her show. She developed some unusual yet incredible fetishes for herself that only her bisexual girlfriends know about and share.
 * Shiloh (played by Andy Mientus): A young man about Stephanie's age who developed a crush on her ever since when they both moved to Avenue Q at the same time. Shiloh is very athletic, because not only is a he big fan of Sportacus, but he's also a very skilled martial artist. Of course, he's an orphan, too, for when he was a kid, he lost his parents to a bunch of murderers. Unknown to him, that murderer was Constable Griswald and his squad, for they did it with police brutality since they were not only ordered to by their superiors, but also, Shiloh's parents are like him: Immigrants. When Shiloh did well as a blackbelt, an incident occurred to him that gave him superpowers that match those of Sportacus. As a result, he became Sportacus's sidekick, Sportashiloh (after he learned how to be as athletic with sports as him).
 * Seymour Krelborn: A nerdy florist who loves "strange and interesting" plants. He is nice and well-intentioned, but is easily influenced: the plant, Audrey II, tricks him into feeding it humans. Portrayed by either Lee Wilkof, Hunter Foster, Anthony Rapp or Jake Gyllenhaal.
 * Audrey Krelborn: A kind, shy, friendly, and awkward coworker who is the object of Seymour's affections. Portrayed by either Ellen Greene, Alice Ripley, Tari Kelly or Tammy Blanchard.
 * Hayden Panettiere
 * Amanda Green: She was once an actress, now the Head of H.E.R.P.E.S. (Holistic Edutainment Regulation Proprietary Enforcement Syndicate) and the Composer of "Bring it On" and "Hands on a Hard Body". She originally performed as Gary Coleman in the Workshop for the show.
 * Elder Kevin Price (played by either Andrew Rannells or Gavin Creel)
 * Elder Arnold Cunningham (played by either Josh Gad or Ben Platt; Sadly, he'll be fired from his job as a Latter-Day Saints elder due to him being a chronic liar that caused a false religion: The Book of Arnold. As a result, all the elders who wanted to promote the Book of Arnold were fired as well, and the Book of Arnold became null and void.)
 * Nabulungi Hatimbi (Nikki M. James): Elder Cunningham's partner/girlfriend, who despite coming from a terrible life in Uganda, remains upbeat and optimistic, thanks to the Mormons' teachings.
 * Constable Griswald: A police officer who is considered a racist douche to everyone, and he's proud of it. Griswald worships Donald Trump as a hero, enough to want to follow his ways. He hates puppets, monsters and immigrants, wanting America to be an all-white, human-only country, which was why he joined the Neo-Nazis, but not as a Nazi Zombie. When he was killed in action in an epic fight against Kung Fury and the Avenue Q Heroes, he was brought back from the dead as a Nazi Zombie by the villains, making him more than happy to be a part of the Nazi Zombie army. Portrayed by ???.😈
 * Rosie O'Donnell
 * Ariel Winter
 * Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen
 * Justin Bieber (Avenue Q version)
 * Selena Gomez
 * Jesse McCartney
 * Miley Cyrus (Avenue Q version)
 * N*Sync
 * Cleopatra
 * A*Teens
 * Bill Cosby (Avenue Q version)
 * O.J. Simpson (Avenue Q version)😈
 * Ray Charles (Avenue Q version; Dedicated to the singer who passed away some time ago)
 * Mariah Carey
 * Michael Jackson (Avenue Q version)
 * R. Kelly (Avenue Q version)
 * Valerie Harper (Avenue Q version)
 * Mary Tyler Moore (Avenue Q version)
 * Same Difference (Sean Smith and Sarah Smith)
 * Melanie Amaro
 * Two Fat Ladies (Clarissa Dickson Wright and Jennifer Paterson; Avenue Q versions)
 * Alex Mack: Formerly an average teenager from Paradise Valley, now an attractive adult living on Avenue Q, surprisingly keeping the youth of her teenage self. Long ago from her old hometown, while walking home from school, she was nearly hit by a truck carrying GC-161 and was doused with it, thus giving her extraordinary powers. Among them are telekinesis and the ability to liquefy. She did not take the antidote, and decided to be a superhero. During these times, she became bisexual, enough to love not only Ray, but also certain girls she finds cute and/or sexy, like Stephanie, Faith, Jasmine, Drew Baringmore, Sally Mae Beauregard, Barbara Jo & Bridget Bimbo, Nari, the Olsen Twins, and some others. Portrayed by Larisa Oleynik.
 * Ray Alvarado: Alex's closest friend and next-door neighbor-turned-boyfriend, and the only one besides Annie to know about Alex's powers. Portrayed by Darris Love.
 * Annie Mack: Alex's older sister, and a scientific genius in her own right. Next to Ray, she is the only one who originally knows about Alex's powers. She administers various scientific tests to ensure Alex's safety. She also hopes to one day present her research, in an effort to stop Danielle Atron. Portrayed by Meredith Bishop.
 * Kung Fury: A Miami detective who possesses a new and powerful form of kung fu after being struck by lightning and bitten by a cobra, thus becoming "The Chosen One" as foretold by an ancient prophecy. Portrayed by David Sandberg.
 * Toxic Avenger: Also known as Melvin Ferd III. A weakling constantly harassed by bullies, Melvin was eventually chased into a drum of toxic waste that transformed him into a hideous yet super strong monster. Melvin decided to use his newfound strength to fight evil and pollution as the Toxic Avenger ever since. Portrayed by Ben Irish.
 * Sarah Ferd: Toxic Avenger's beloved wife. Thanks to God Himself, her blindness was cured, and she was able to see clearly. To Toxie's delight, she thinks he's beautiful, and she loves him even more. Portrayed by Emma Salvo.
 * Ma Ferd: Melvin's mother. Portrayed by Natalie Hope.
 * Adolf Hitler: Also known as "Kung Führer", back from the dead as the leader of the Nazi Zombies. Just like back when he was alive, he aims to become the greatest martial artist by traveling through time to kill "The Chosen One". He, Bletchinator, Samantha, King Chicken, and Bernice and his army of Nazi Zombies swore loyalty to the Bletchinator. Portrayed by Jorma Tacoone.😈
 * Fifth Harmony (Ally Brooke, Dinah Jane, Lauren Jauregui, Normani Kordei and Camila Cabello)
 * InTENsity (Ma'at Bingham Shango, Nick Dean, Francesca Duncan, John Lindahl, Emily Michalak, Austin Percario, Arin Ray, Ellona Santiago, Emily Wilson, and Lauren Ashley)
 * Stereo Hoggz (Justin Williams, Kregg Gibson, Jonathan Glenn, George Jenkins III, and Trace Kennedy)
 * One Direction (Harry Styles, Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Louis Tomlinson, and Zayn Malik)
 * Sweet Suspense (Celine Polenghi, Millie Thrasher and Summer Reign)
 * Alex & Sierra (Alex Kinsey and Sierra Deaton)
 * Reg E. Cathey (Technical Avenue Q OC; Dedicated to the real celebrity from Square One TV who passed away some time ago)
 * Captain Willard Lazarus: A friendly pirate to good guys, yet he loves treasure, but he despises villains, especially his nemesis, Captain Darkwalker. Portrayed by ???.
 * Captain Sherwood Darkwalker: Captain Buccaneer's nemesis. Portrayed by ???.😈
 * Nick Hamm-Sandwijk: Fritz's Funporium's showrunner, quintessential good guy. Nick left his job show running crime procedurals in L.A. to take on Fritz's Funporium. Secretly, the grieving widower hoped it would help him turn his life around. Nick describes himself as "suffering from vocational PTSD" due to the crime show business, but edutainment is proving to be just as deadly to his sanity and self-confidence, leaving him severely plagued by self-doubt. To compensate and to decompress, Nick secretly writes My Little Pony/Dr. Who/Firefly crossover fanfics. Portrayed by Michael Patrick McCaffrey.
 * Sally Rosen: Fritz's Funporium's upbeat, optimistic, and somewhat delusional producer. Whether handling homicidal puppets or feral writers on the loose in her studio, Sally keeps a cool head and a can-do attitude that occasionally drives everyone she works with to distraction. Also in the "distraction" category is her rack, but that's a whole different ball of wax. Portrayed by Tara Strong.
 * Gusset: Fritz's Funporium's costume master and puppet surgeon. Despite being helpful, highly competent and having a genuine passion for his work, Gusset is a complex, narcissistic character. The puppets refer to him as their Maestro Geppetto, and Gusset most definitely enjoys being treated as a felt-snipping God among his flock. Portrayed by Rizwan Manji.
 * Detective Connie Edwards (from The Happytime Murders)
 * Lt. Banning (from The Happytime Murders)
 * Bubbles (from The Happytime Murders)
 * Sweet Tooth: The villain from Starkid's Holy Musical B@man!. Being that Sweet Tooth is a candy-themed criminal, he uses all of his candy to commit his crimes. He has an endless supply of candy in his suit. Throughout his life of crime, he always used numerous candy and candy puns. Sweet Tooth is considered to be legally insane and psychopathic, according to one of an asylum's psychiatrists. He is sadistic, unmerciful, and unsympathetic towards others. He is also abusive towards his one and only Sugar Baby, Candy, although she doesn't seem to mind. Portrayed by ???.😈
 * Candy: Sweet Tooth's accomplice and lover from Starkid's Holy Musical B@man!. She gets abused by him every time, yet she does not mind at all. Portrayed by ???.😈
 * Gatekeeper: Based on the character of the same name from the Nightmare/Atmosfear VHS board game series. Portrayed by ???.😈
 * The Noxious Offender: Toxie's evil counterpart from an alternate universe. Noxie was brought back from the dead as Hitler's powerful Nazi Zombie. Portrayed by ???.😈

More coming soon (Suggestions are welcome)...

Animated characters

 * Larry Laffer (from Leisure Suit Larry)
 * Faith (from Leisure Suit Larry)
 * Jasmine (from Leisure Suit Larry Reloaded)
 * Drew Baringmore (from Leisure Suit Larry: Love for Sail!)
 * Sally Mae Beauregard (from Leisure Suit Larry: Magna Cum Laude)
 * Barbara Jo Bimbo (from Leisure Suit Larry: Magna Cum Laude)
 * Bridget Bimbo (from Leisure Suit Larry: Magna Cum Laude)
 * Nari (from Leisure Suit Larry: Wet Dreams Don't Dry)
 * Screwy Squirrel
 * Yuckie Duck (from What a Cartoon!)
 * Lower Case (The infamous criminal from the VideoSmarts/ComputerSmarts Sentence Building series)😈
 * Eric T. Duckman (voiced by Jason Alexander)
 * Beatrice
 * Cornfed (voiced by Gregg Berger): A pig who is Duckman's Joe Friday–esque business partner and best friend.
 * Ajax (voiced by Dweezil Zappa): Duckman's eldest, mentally-slow teenage son
 * Charles and Mambo: (voiced by Pat Musick and E.G. Daily, respectively) Duckman's genius conjoined twins whose heads share a body.
 * Beverly (voiced by Nancy Travis): Beatrice and Bernice's lovely blue-eyed sister and Cornfed's wife.
 * Grandma-ma: Duckman's apparently comatose, immensely flatulent mother-in-law. Grandma-ma sits in the same chair and rarely moves.
 * King Chicken (voiced by Tim Curry): Duckman's arch-nemesis. Duckman constantly teased him in high school, which encouraged other kids to do the same. King Chicken cites this for why he became a super villain. His catchphrase, simply "Mwah ha ha, bawk bawk bawk!" usually punctuates the end of his speeches about his evil plan. His name is a parody of former President of the United States George H. W. Bush.😈
 * Bernice (voiced by Nancy Travis): Duckman's sister-in-law and the identical twin of Beatrice who is a fanatic fitness buff and hates Duckman with a passion. Ever since she married King Chicken, she joined with him on his villainous schemes and is willing to help him with his revenge on Duckman.😈

Other OCs are being planned (All currently unnamed):


 * A Blue Elephant Cuddleuppet (to be Cinderelmo's living, talking blanket friend)
 * A Red Angry Bird Cuddleuppet✍
 * A Minnie Mouse Cuddleuppet✍
 * A blue-furred monster
 * A sexy human cheerleader
 * A sexy puppet cheerleader
 * A dragon
 * A chef puppet
 * Three or four characters provided by the Muppet Whatnot Workshop
 * A green fuzzy caterpillar
 * A red fuzzy caterpillar
 * A rainbow fuzzy caterpillar
 * A girly rainbow fuzzy caterpillar
 * An aqua blue fuzzy caterpillar
 * A pink striped fuzzy caterpillar
 * A green-and-black-striped fuzzy caterpillar
 * A bee
 * A ladybug
 * A blackish-brown baby bunny
 * A red Muppaphone (or a Fuzzball)
 * A blue Muppaphone (or a Fuzzball)
 * A green Muppaphone (or a Fuzzball)
 * A pink Muppaphone (or a Fuzzball)
 * A white baby bunny
 * A dolphin
 * A white, brown and black kitten
 * An orange kitten
 * A monarch butterfly
 * Three baby chicks
 * A baby fox
 * A bat
 * A spider
 * A yellow Labrador puppy
 * A grey-furred Cheshire cat with the manners of Cookie Monster (Ala Abby in Wonderland/American McGee's Alice)
 * A sea foam female monster with yellow hair
 * A Mormon puppet elder
 * A Mormon monster elder
 * A serpent😈

Guests

 * Matt Stone
 * Trey Parker
 * Tom Kitt
 * Jeff Marx
 * Bobby Lopez
 * Brian Yorkey
 * Lin-Manuel Miranda
 * Brian Stokes Mitchell (as Paul from Carnival)
 * Anthony Rapp (as Seymour Krelbourn and Mark Cohen)
 * Kristen-Anderson Lopez
 * Cliffton Hall and Deedee Magno-Hall
 * Jeff Whitty
 * Susan Egan
 * Leslie Odom Jr.
 * Adam Sandler
 * Wayne Brady
 * Drew Barrymore
 * James Rolfe (as the Angry Video Game Nerd)
 * Chris Rock
 * Arsenio Hall
 * Jaleel White (as Steve Urkel)
 * Bruce Campbell
 * Emeril Lagasse
 * Marilyn Manson
 * Judith Shindlein (as Judge Judy)
 * Shaquille O'Neal
 * Jack Black
 * Little Richard
 * Dave Coulier
 * Eddie Murphy
 * Shoshana Bean
 * Toxic Audio
 * Spider-Man (as he appeared on the Electric Company, portrayed by Jed Resnick)
 * Adam Pascal (as Roger Davis and William Shakespeare)
 * Jesse L. Martin (as Tom Collins and Marvin Gaye)
 * John Cena
 * Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson
 * Stone Cold Steve Austin
 * Rhonda Rousey
 * Bayley
 * Macaulay Culkin
 * Christopher Lloyd
 * Megan Hilty (as Marilyn Monroe)
 * Kick-Ass
 * Hit-Girl
 * Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Songs (in no particular order currently, except the beginning two and the ending two)

 * Avenue Q Theme
 * It Sucks to Be Me (performed by Kate Monster, Brian, Nicky, Rod, Christmas Eve and Gary Coleman)
 * Everyone's a Little Bit Racist
 * Purpose (performed by Princeton and the Whatnots)
 * Fantasies Come True
 * There's A Fine, Fine Line (performed by Kate Monster)
 * Save Our Puppet Friends (from Fritz's Funporium)
 * The Internet is for Porn (performed by Kate, Trekkie, Brian, Rod, Princeton and Gary Coleman)
 * You Can Be as Loud as the Hell You Want (When You're Makin' Love) (performed by Gary Coleman and the Bad Idea Bears with Princeton, Kate Monster, Brian, Christmas Eve and Trekkie Monster)
 * Time Warp (from Rocky Horror Show)
 * Let's Talk Dirty to The Animals
 * Taylor the Latte Boy
 * One Song Glory (from Rent, sung by Julian)
 * Special/Two Lips (sung by Lucy)
 * There's Always a Woman (sung by Kate and Lucy)
 * I Love to Be Unhappy (sung by Bozar the Grouch)
 * We are One (performed by Same Difference and the Avenue Q cast)
 * Spooky Mormon Hell Dream (from the Book of Mormon, performed by Elder Price, Satan, Adolf Hitler, Genghis Khan, Jeffrey Dahmer, Johnnie Cochran, and Devils)
 * Sweet Victory (Originally by David Glen Eisley, used in Spongebob)
 * Popular (from Wicked, performed by Kate and Trekkie Monster)
 * The Monster Mash (Originally by Bobby "Boris" Pickett, performed by Alcindor Von Count with the rest of the cast)
 * Who are the People in Your Neighborhood (from Sesame Street, performed by Brian, Kate Monster and Rod, as the Babysitter and Investment Banker)
 * Silent Scream (Originally by Anna Blue, performed by Alys)
 * Honey (Touch Me with My Clothes On) (performed by Lucy the Slut, ironically)
 * Lucky (Originally by Britney Spears, performed by Sally Rosen)
 * One Little Star (from Sesame Street presents Follow That Bird, performed by Excalibird, Sally and Barnaby, with Stephanie, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Princeton, Kate Monster, Fritz, Heidi, Huxtable, Angelita, Terry)
 * Dancing Queen (performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * We Will Rock You (Originally by Queen, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * We Are The Champions (Originally by Queen, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * I'm a Believer (from Shrek the Musical, performed by Huxtable, Heidi, and Fritz)
 * Beat It (performed by Michael Jackson)
 * Smooth Criminal (performed by Michael Jackson)
 * Bad (performed by Michael Jackson)
 * C is for Cookie (from Sesame Street, performed by Cookie Marshal)
 * I Don't Want to Live on the Moon (from Sesame Street, performed by Stephanie, ALF, Cinderelmo, Angelita, Terry, and Julian)
 * Hello! (from The Book of Mormon, performed by Elder Price, Elder Cunningham, and the other Elders, including two Mormon Avenue Q characters)
 * Rubber Condom (Parody of "Rubber Duckie", performed by Easy)
 * Learn Your Lessons Well (from Godspell, performed by Peter Linz as Jesus, with Cinderelmo, Russell, Ginger and the children of Avenue Q, sung by Kate Monster)
 * Those Endearing Young Charms Piano Bomb skit (from Looney Tunes, instrumental, played by Rod and Nicky)
 * Spider-Man vs. the Pirates (skit, idea taken from the Spidey Super Stories record, with Jed Resnick as Spider-Man and Peter Linz, Captain Darkwater, Tony Whitten as Captain Lazarus)
 * I've Grown Accustomed to Your Face (originally by Rosemary Clooney, sung by Stephanie D'Abruzzo)
 * The Greatest Show (from The Greatest Showman)
 * Time (To Do the Things That You Want to Do) (performed by Nicky and Rod)
 * Have You Never (performed by Stephanie, then joined in the final chorus by her newfound best friends: Cinderelmo, Ginger, Princess Joan, Angelita, Terry, Henry, Trevor the Grouch, Alys, Russell, Excalibird, Barnaby and Tilly)
 * There's Always A Way (performed by Stephanie, to motivate Princeton to never give up on finding his purpose)
 * Energy (performed by Sportacus, Stephanie, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Princess Joan, Angelita, Terry, Henry, Alys, Franco, and Trevor the Grouch)
 * Teamwork (performed by Stephanie, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Princess Joan, Angelita, Terry, Henry, Alys, Franco, and Scruff)
 * Galaxy (performed by Stephanie, ALF, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Angelita, Terry, Henry, and Excalibird)
 * Good Stuff (performed by Stephanie)
 * Playtime (performed by Stephanie)
 * Cooking by the Book (performed by Stephanie, Kate Monster, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Angelita, Alys, Princess Joan, Terry, Henry, Franco)
 * You are a Pirate (performed by Captain Lazarus, Stephanie, Princeton, Kate Monster, Julian, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Princess Joan, Angelita, Terry, Henry, Trevor the Grouch, Franco, Alys, Russell, Excalibird, Barnaby, and Tilly)
 * Man on a Mission (performed by Heidi and Stephanie with Phil Phillips, Connie Edwards, Huxtable, Princeton, Kate Monster, Julian, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Princess Joan, Angelita, Terry, Henry, Trevor the Grouch, Franco, Alys, Russell, and Excalibird)
 * Kick Your Ass (from The Toxic Avenger: The Musical, performed by Toxie)
 * Dynamic Duet (from Holy Musical B@man!, performed by Sportacus and Shiloh)
 * Just Because (from Sesame Street, performed by Gary Coleman)
 * Schadenfreude (performed by Fritz and Gary Coleman)
 * The More You Ruv Someone (performed by Christmas Eve and Kate Monster)
 * I'm Not Wearing Underwear Today (performed by Brian)
 * As Long as You're Mine (from Wicked, performed by Princeton and Kate Monster)
 * Angry Video Game Nerd theme song
 * Mad World (Originally by Michael Andrews and Gary Jules)
 * Friendship Means (from Wrinkles: In Need of Cuddles, performed by ???)
 * Me Lost Me Cookie at the Mosh Pit (performed by Cookie Mongoloid)
 * How Much Do the People In Your Neighborhood Make? (originally cut from the Broadway production)
 * Seasons of Love (from Rent, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * Dancing Through Life (from Wicked, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * You and Me (But Mostly Me) (from Book of Mormon, performed by Princeton and Nicky)
 * Happy to Meet You (from Sesame Street, performed by Stephanie, Alys, Cinderelmo and Excalibird)
 * We Are Number One (from LazyTown, performed by Gordon the Gecko with Freddy Freebase and two minions)
 * In Unexpected Places (from Kermit: Prince of Denmark)
 * Rogues are We (from Holy Musical B@man!, performed by various villains)
 * A Freak Like Me Needs Company (from Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark, performed by Bletchinator with Samantha, Gordon the Gecko, Dead End Grouch, Kute, the Notorious B.I.G. Bird, Freddy Freebase, the 'Countant, Constable Griswald, Lower Case, King Chicken, Bernice, a serpent, Captain Darkwalker, Adolf Hitler, O.J. Simpson, Rap Rat, Sweet Tooth, Candy and other villains)
 * Rogues are We (reprise) (from Holy Musical B@man!, performed by Sweet Tooth, Candy, and other villains)
 * Samantha, the Queen of Mean (Parody of "Gnorga, the Queen of Mean", performed by Samantha with the Nazi Zombies)
 * Genesis (a medley of songs from Children of Eden and The Apple Tree)
 * Exodus (a medley of songs from Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, Aida and The Prince of Egypt)
 * Jesus Rocks (a selection of songs from Jesus Christ Superstar, featuring Lucy as Mary Magdalene and once again Peter Linz in the role of Jesus)
 * Joseph Smith American Moses (Narrated by Peter Linz, performed by the cast)
 * Turn Back O Man (performed by Lucy the Slut)
 * Cell Block Tango (from Chicago)
 * We Beseech Thee (performed by Princeton)
 * True Blue Miracle (from Sesame Street, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * I Hope That Somethin' Better Comes Along (from The Muppet Movie, performed by Princeton and Julian)
 * We Are All Earthlings (from Sesame Street, performed by Princeton, Kate Monster, Julian, Twitchy Monster, Trish, Stephanie, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Princess Joan, Angelita, Terry, Henry, Trevor the Grouch, Cookie Marshal, Alys, Russell, Excalibird, Barnaby, Tilly, Roberta, Rose, Phil Phillips, Heidi, Huxtable, Sid, Seymour the Elechicken, Robert, Lucille, Arthur, Fritz, Gracie, Butler, Toxie, Sarah, Seymour Krelborn, Audrey, Alex Mack, Ariel Winter, Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez)
 * Life is a Party (Originally by Aaron Carter)
 * Alone in the Universe (from Seussical, performed by Princeton and Cinderelmo)
 * Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Doing the Mambo (from Kermit: Prince of Denmark)
 * Shut Up and Eat Your Food
 * Sexercise (a rap performed by Spamela Hamderson, Stephanie, Alex Mack, Selena Gomez, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, Faith, Jasmine (from Leisure Suit Larry Reloaded), Drew Baringmore, Sally Mae Beauregard, Barbara Jo & Bridget Bimbo and Nari)
 * Three is a Magic Number (from Schoolhouse Rock; A mix of both the classic and the Three Musketeers cover)
 * Ready or Not, Here I Come (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Figure Eight (from Schoolhouse Rock, performed by Ginger)
 * The Shot Heard 'Round The World (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Orange Man Bad (performed by all the female characters)
 * Sufferin' Till Suffrage (from Schoolhouse Rock, performed by all the female characters, mainly ???)
 * I'm Just a Bill (from Schoolhouse Rock, performed by Bill)
 * Mother Necessity (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * The Great American Melting Pot (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Walkin' On Wall Street (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Tyrannosaurus Debt (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Conjunction Junction (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Interjections (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs Here (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * The Great American Melting Pot (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Fireworks (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * A Noun is a Person, Place, or Thing (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Verb: That's What's Happening (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Electricity, Electricity (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Interplanet Janet (from Schoolhouse Rock)
 * Do You Hear the People Sing? (from Les Misérables, performed by Sportacus and the Avenue Q cast)
 * The Confrontation (from Les Misérables, performed by Kung Fury and Griswald)
 * They Live in You (from The Lion King, performed by Sportacus, singing to Cinderelmo)
 * Freak Flag (from Shrek the Musical)
 * The American Way (from Holy Musical B@man!, performed by Sportacus and Sweet Tooth)
 * You Can't Stop the Beat (from Hairspray, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * Meet the Feebles (performed by the new Feebles, consisting of the surviving veteran Feebles (minus Sebastian), Huxtable, the Avenue Q puppet characters, Fritz's Funporium puppet characters, Larry Laffer, Screwy Squirrel, Yuckie Duck, and Phil Phillips)
 * Song of Freedom (from The Fearless Four; performed by the Avenue Q cast as a song against Donald Trump and his presidency)
 * Da-Doo (from Little Shop of Horrors, performed by ???, with ??? speaking)
 * Suddenly, Shiloh (To the tune of "Suddenly, Seymour"; from Little Shop of Horrors, performed by Shiloh and Stephanie)
 * Skid Row (Downtown) (from Little Shop of Horrors, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * Somewhere That's Green (from Little Shop of Horrors, performed by Audrey)
 * Feed Me (Git It) (from Little Shop of Horrors, performed by Audrey II, Shiloh, Princeton, Julian, Larry Laffer, Duckman, Fritz and Huxtable)
 * Suppertime (from Little Shop of Horrors, performed by Audrey II)
 * Sominex/Suppertime" (reprise) (from Little Shop of Horrors, performed by Stephanie and Audrey II, but Stephanie will be saved and spared from certain death)
 * Rent (from Rent, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * Hot Toxic Love (from The Toxic Avenger: The Musical, performed by Toxie and Sarah)
 * The Legend of the Toxic Avenger (from The Toxic Avenger: The Musical, performed by Sportacus and Toxie)
 * Bitch/Slut/Liar/Whore (from The Toxic Avenger: The Musical, performed by Lucy and Sandra)
 * Something Better (from Muppet Treasure Island, performed by Stephanie, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Joan, Angelita, Terry, Henry, Trevor the Grouch, Alys, Russell, Excalibird, Barnaby and Tilly)
 * We Built This City (As a montage song)
 * I Believe in Love (from Hair, performed by Kate Monster)
 * Hippie Life (from Hair, performed by Lucy)
 * Seid Bereit (German version of The Lion King's Be Prepared, performed by Adolf Hitler and the Nazi Zombies)
 * The Witch is in the House (from The Muppets' Wizard of Oz, performed by Bastinda)
 * Don't Feed the Plants (from Little Shop of Horrors)
 * I/We Believe (from Book of Mormon, sung by Princeton to motivate the crowd)
 * It's Time (from Evil Dead: the Musical, performed by Sportacus and the Nazi Zombies)
 * Carnage Rules (As a battle song)
 * You Have More Friends Than You Know (from Glee)
 * When You Love (Originally by Sinéad O'Connor; A slow dance song for Princeton and Kate Monster at their wedding)
 * From Now On (from The Greatest Showman, performed by the Avenue Q cast)
 * For Now/Finale (A medley of certain songs, performed by the Avenue Q cast)

More coming soon (Suggestions are welcome)...

Locations

 * Princeton's Apartment
 * Monstersori School
 * Julian's Apartment
 * Brian and Christmas Eve's House
 * Krelborn Residence (Seymour and Audrey's House)
 * Around the Clock Café
 * Grill or Be Grilled (Chef Flambé's food truck)
 * Dante's Pizza
 * Conjunction Junction Diner
 * Morningside Orphanage
 * Trevor's Trashcan
 * Lolly's Inc.
 * Central Park
 * Empire State Building
 * Statue of Liberty
 * Rockefeller Center
 * Metropolitan Museum of Art
 * 9/11 Memorial and Museum
 * Times Square
 * Brooklyn Bridge
 * Fifth Avenue
 * New York Public Library
 * Wall Street
 * Conjunction Junction
 * Radio City Music Hall
 * St. Patrick's Cathedral
 * Carnegie Hall
 * Broadway
 * Castle Wolfenstein

More coming soon (Suggestions are welcome)...

Puppeteers

 * John Tartaglia-Princeton/Rod/A.D.D./Himself
 * Rick Lyon-Nicky/Trekkie Monster/Ricky/Blue Bad Idea Bear/Julian/Eugene Levy/H.E.R.P.E.S. member/Charlie Sheen (puppetry)/Butler/Himself
 * Stephanie D'Abruzzo-Kate Monster/Lucy/Trish/Herself
 * Peter Linz-Nicky understudy/Trekkie understudy/Terry/Twitchy/Serpent
 * Victor Yerrid-Howard Stern/Mike Pence/ALF/David Hasselhoff/Blue Crab
 * Drew Massey-Excalibird/Princeton understudy/Nicky understudy/Princeton's Dad/Russell/Jeffrey Dahmer/Tom Cruise/Red Crab/Achmed/Michael Jackson
 * Jennifer Barnhart-Mrs. Thistletwat/Princeton's Mom/Yellow Bad Idea Bear/Serpent(puppetry)/Roberta/Becky/Kate understudy/Lucy understudy/Bastinda/Nicky and Trekkie assistant/Herself
 * Jodi Eichelberger-Rod understudy/Princeton understudy/Cody/Audrey III (puppetry)
 * Donna Kimball-Angelita
 * Bill Barretta-Phil Philips (reprising the role from the HappyTime Murders film)/Devils/Ricky understudy/Nicky understudy/Freddy Freebase/George W. Bush
 * Lara MacLean-Butler assistant
 * Kevin Clash-Johnnie Cochran/Adoption agent/The Notorious B.I.G. Bird/Himself/Satan/Barack Obama/Audrey III (voice)
 * John Jennings
 * Carey Anderson-Joan/Ginger
 * Mary Faber-Rose/Candi
 * Sarah Stiles-Rachel/Alys/Spamela Hamderson/Kate understudy/Lucy understudy
 * Jed Resnick-Austin/Ricky Recycle Bin/Trevor the Grouch/Spider-Man/Princeton understudy/Rod understudy/Cinderelmo
 * Gabriel Velez-Bozar the Grouch
 * Christian Anderson-Nicky understudy/Trekkie understudy/Princeton understudy/Charlie Sheen (voice)
 * Artie Esposito-Mitt Romney/Mr. Carter
 * James Murray
 * Michael Liscio Jr.-Nicky understudy/Trekkie understudy/Ricky understudy/Pippy the Crackpipe (voice)/Barnaby Snufflestiltskin
 * Dan Milano-Alcindor/Winoceros
 * Tony Whitten-Bertz
 * Brett O'Quinn
 * Maggie Lakis-Hillary Clinton/Easy/Botox the Ostrich
 * Charles Hubbell-Fritz
 * Bonni Allen-Gracie
 * Jeff Neppl-Pat

Additional performers

 * Leo Daignault
 * Sean Johnson
 * Patrick Johnson
 * Howie Michael Smith-Leather Jacket Whatnot/Rap Rat (credited as Howard M. Smith)
 * Julianne Buescher-Tilly Snufflestiltskin/Cheerleader Whatnot
 * Brad Abrell-Hoodie Whatnot
 * Steve Whitmire-Weldon the I.T. Guy/H.E.R.P.E.S member

Puppets built/refurbished by:
James Wojtal, Rick Lyon, Julianne Buescher, Drew Massey, Sean Johnson, Patrick Johnson, Jane Gootnick

The Feebles: Mark Hadlow, Peter Vere-Jones, Donna Akerston (don't remember the rest)

Whatnots courtesy of FAO Schwartz