Ed, Edd n Eddy the Movie: The Ed-Touchables/Transcript

This is the transcript of the animated reboot film of Ed, Edd n Eddy, Ed, Edd n Eddy the Movie: The Ed-Touchables

Part 1: Opening/Meet the Eds
(Shows Cartoon Network logo)

Cartoon Network

presents

An

a.k.a. Cartoon

Production

A

Danny Antonucci

film

(The scene fades to a long-shot view of the cul-de-sac. It looks peaceful and quiet. The title flashes on the screen.)

ED, EDD N EDDY: THE ED-TOUCHABLES

(A backyard is shown. There is a kiddie pool set up with a toy boat gently rocking in it. Behind the pool is a clothesline, strung with clothes.)

Based on the TV Series and Characters Created by

Danny Antonucci

(A sprinkler is watering Kevin's lawn. Kevin's bike is leaned against the garage. A close-up is shown of the sprinkler moving back and forth before looking at another house across the street.)

Written by

Jono Howard

Mike Kubat

Rachel Connor

Stacy Warnick

Danny Antonucci

(Rolf's tractor is sitting abandoned in a field of weeds. Rolf seems to have been mowing the lawn before suddenly stopping for some unknown reason. The wind blows, and some dandelion seeds come loose and float to another lawn, where a checkers game seems to have been in progress. A half-finished bottle of soda and a can of wood varnish occupy each end of the board.)

Music by

Patric Caird

(An abandoned basketball is seen next to a game of hopscotch. Strangely, the number on the end is 62, and the square is incomplete. Following the said trail, we find some broken chalk, two abandoned shoes, a skateboard with the wheels still rolling, and a dropped ice-cream cone on which ants are crawling.)

Directed by

Danny Antonucci

(The scene cuts to a blue house. Inside the house lives a weak but intelligent 14-year-old boy. The scene cuts to the boy inside his room. He uses a labeler to label the stuff in his room, such as a desk lamp labeled "Desk Lamp", a bookshelf full of books labeled "Books", a desk labeled "Desk", a laptop labeled "Computer", and an alarm clock labeled "Alarm Clock". Around the room can be seen other evidence of his labeling, such as a bed labeled "Sack" and a label reading "Door Knob" next to the doorknob.)

Boy: 4,820, 4,821, 4,822, 4,823, 4,824... Ooh, I like what you've done with that tunnel. 4,825, 4,826, 4,827, 4,828, 4,829, 4,830, 4,831, 4,832, 4,833, 4834, 4,835, 4,836, and finally, 4,837. Well, that's everybody. Four thousand eight hundred and... (does some calculations on an abacus) ...thirty-seven.

(The boy places a label reading "Ants: 4,837" on his ant farm.)

Boy: There. Almost done.

(The doorbell then rings. He walks down to get the door. Upon opening it, he finds out that there's no one there. He is halfway up the steps when the doorbell rings again. He goes down to get the door and, once again, there's no one there. He tests the doorbell and then goes upstairs. Once again, he gets halfway up before the doorbell rings again. He rushes down to get it.)

Boy: Now, please.

(A water bucket falls on his head. The boy closes the door and once again starts up the steps only to have the bell ring when he's halfway up. He goes down to get the door and looks up carefully to make sure there are no unpleasant surprises. Just as he's about to stop looking up, a fish hits him in the face. He stands there stunned for a few seconds and then heads up the stairs, an odor now surrounding him. Once again, the doorbell rings when he's halfway up. He rushes down to get it. This time, when he answers it, he finds Eddy.)

Eddy: Hey, Double D, what took you so long?

Edd: Oh. Hello, Eddy. So, what are you doing?

Eddy: I thought I should hang out with one of my best friends.

(Edd remembers the pranks.)

Edd: Hey. Was that you ringing my doorbell?

Eddy: Who, me? Nah.

(Edd and Eddy arrived in Edd's room. Eddy was stopped when Edd holds up a pair of bunny slippers.)

Edd: Wait, Eddy. You know the rules.

Eddy: Aw, come on, Edd. Not again.

(Edd wiggles the slippers, smiling.)

Eddy: All right. Sheesh, stupid slippers.

Edd: And I'll dispose of these.

(Edd puts the shoes in a box labeled "Shoes".)

Eddy: Okay. The slippers are on nowwWWHOAAA!

(Eddy's head gets sucked in but is shaken out. Edd is finished with his nose.)

Edd: Almost done.

(Edd vacuums the back of Eddy's shirt.)

Eddy: Gee, thanks Edd.

Edd: After you, Eddy.

Eddy: Yeah. After me.

(After entering the room, Eddy spots Edd's bed. He goes over and jumps on it.)

Edd: Eddy! Messy messy messy messy messy. Please don't do that, Eddy.

(Eddy begins switching labels, switching the "Slipper" label, which he places on the bed, with the "Bed" label.)

Edd: Eddy! Please return those labels to their rightful designations.

Eddy: Alright, alright, don't have a bird.

(Eddy takes the slipper label off the bed and replaces it with one that says "Toilet".)

Eddy: Are you done yet? Let's go get Ed!

Edd: Please be patient. I have just one more...

(Edd puts down a "Magnifying Glass" label and realizes it's missing.)

Edd: HHAH! It's gone. Eddddyyyy. Someone took my magnifying glass. I feel so violated.

Eddy: Maybe you misplaced it.

Edd: Never! What has become of this world? Is nothing sacred? Everything is soiled! Who would do such a thing? Who would violate the sanctity of somebody's room? With their filthy hands! Oh. Oh Eddy. I feel sick. I feel nauseous. I CAN'T BREATHE!

(Eddy goes over, picks up Edd's mattress, and slams it down on him.)

Edd: Thank you. I needed that.

Eddy: Anytime, pal! You know, you can't have somebody touching your stuff. It just isn't right. Okay. Race you to Ed's place.

(Edd and Eddy rush over to Ed's. When they get there, Ed can clearly be seen watching a horror movie on TV. They tiptoe to the window.)

Eddy: There he is.

(Eddy and Edd sneak in through the window. When Edd tries to enter, the window slams on his fingers, and he makes noises of pain.)

Eddy: Ssh. Quit fooling around.

(Eddy continues to sneak up on Ed. Just as he's about to pounce, Ed grabs him in a headlock and gives him a noogie.)

Ed: Hey, Eddy! What's up?

Edd: Dogpile!

(The Eds' tussle. Ed ends up victorious, with the two of them in a headlock.)

Ed: Hi Edd Double D. You guys make me laugh.

Eddy: Of course we do... wait, where's Sarah?

Edd: Don't you remember, everyone in the cul-de-sac are out of town for the entire summer.

Eddy: Oh, right. Guys, this has all happened before like the last time.

Edd: You're right. Last time, we believe that a so-called serial toucher is touching and stealing everyone's stuff. We thought that it was Jonny.

Eddy: That's right. I know a way to clear our boredom.

(Eddy holding up a jar of coins as Ed and Edd are in shocked.)

Eddy: So boys, what's big, round, costs a nickel?

Ed and Edd: Jawbreakers!

Eddy: Now away we go!

More coming soon!