Our Family/Transcript

(Show Century Fox Logo on Screen)

Narrator : There was a different world behind the real life, yes, a different world. This world was animated, and the peoples were always get grounded by their parents.

Evil Boris : OH SCREW THIS NARRATOR ! OK GUYS, SO, THIS IS TALKIN' ABOUT ONE FUCKING KID WHO IS BALD. YOU KNOW WHO IT IS ? UHHH!!!??? YOU KNOW IT !!!

Narrator : Just shut your mouth up, Evil Boris. You're spoiling the entire movie.

Evil Boris : OH HELL NO, HAVE I THE RIGHT TO SPEAK ?!!!

Narrator : No.

Evil Boris : FUCK YOU! *he disappears*.

Narrator : Anyways, let's continue. This world was called Go!Animate City or Vyond. Honestly, everyone was happy and it was peace. Until one day, when one kid named Caillou was born...

Doris : Uuughh! I can't take it anymore!

Boris : You can do it! Push !

Doctor 1 : Push, the baby is almost there! Push !

Doris : YAAAAAHHH!!!! *baby come out from Doris*.

Unnamed boy : Waaaaa!!!! *cries*

Doris : Oh my god! He is so cute!

Doctor 2 : Congratulations, Mrs Anderson. Your baby's a boy.

Boris : Ya, our baby's cute.

Doris : Which name can we named our baby son ?

Boris : I know, David !

Caillou (baby) : Caillou.

Doris : Oh my god, he said his first word ! Caillou ! Good name, we should call it Caillou !

Boris : Ewwww. He's not a rock.

Doris : Boris, David is a good name, but "Caillou" is so much better than David !

Boris : I never thought we could call a baby "Caillou". Jeez... i hate this name.

Doris : Boris !

Boris : Ok, fine ! Caillou is our son's name.

Doctor 1 : Caillou is officially your son's name ! Congrats!

Boris : Ugh... My life will be ruined...

8 years later...

(Caillou was playing with his toys)

Caillou : Hurray ! Viva la vida !

Rosie : Rosie's not feeling good...

Caillou : Rosie ? Are you okay ?

Rosie : No, i'm feeling very very bad.

Caillou : I should call mommy. Mommy !!! MOMMY !!

Doris : Yes, Caillou ? Jesus Christ, calm down !

Caillou : Rosie is feeling very bad, she is very pale.

Doris : Oh my god, it is very bad news !

Boris : What the hell is wrong here ?

Doris : Our Rosie isn't feeling very good.

Boris : Oh no ! We should call a doctor.

Doris : Ya ! Caillou, Grandma will be forced to keep an eye on you.

Caillou : Awww-awww man ! Why ?

Boris : It's for your own good, if Rosie is dying in front of you, you will cry for an eternity.

Caillou : Rosie will die ?

Doris : We don't know, Caillou. Me and your dad don't know about that.

Caillou : I don't want my sister to die !! WAAAAA!

Boris : Oh shit, not again...

Doris : Boris, watch your language !

Caillou : I'm crying forever !

Doris : You shouldn't have said that, Boris.

Boris : But it was for his own good !

(Rosie stop breathing and dies in front of the whole family)

Doris : OH NO!!! ROSIE HAS DIED !!!

Boris : Awww !!! IT'S CAILLOU'S FAULT FOR CRYING !

Doris : No, it's not his fault, but it's your fault. You keep making him sad or umconfortable when we're going somewhere!

Boris : Oh yeah ? My fault ? That peace of bald isn't the kid i wanted. He is just a idiot and a stupid fucking kid that do not deserve to exist in the earth !

Doris : Jeez, you such a bully ! Get out of my house, it's over between us !

Boris : Go fuck yourself, bitch !

(Caillou is shocked)

Doris : FUCK YOU ! *slap boris*

Boris : HOW DARE YOU SLAP ME ! THAT'S IT, MY EVIL CLONE IS COMING FOREVER!!!!!

Doris : I don't care about your stupid freaking clone. You're worse than him.

Evil Boris : OHOHOHOHOHOOHOHOHOHOOHOHOHOOHOHOH, EVERYONE FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK THEMSELF!!!

Doris : THAT'S IT! GET OUT!

Evil Boris : I WILL HAUNT YOU ONE DAY, CAILLOU!!!

Doris : Caillou, i'm terribly sorry but we're moving away. Because of that psycho.

Caillou : What is a psycho, mommy ?

Doris : It's a person who is crazy.

Caillou : Mommy, why daddy has a red skin ?

Doris : He is in full of anger. Do never approach him again. Never.

Caillou : Ok mommy.

Evil Boris : CAILLOU DESERVE TO DIE!!!!!!!!!

Caillou : *hic* I deserve to die ? *cries*

Doris : BORIS, THAT'S ENOUGH ! I'M CALLING THE POLICE ON YOU !

Evil Boris : GO AHEAD AND CALL THEM ! I DON'T FUCKING CARE !

Police officer : Boris, you are going to jail right now !

Evil Boris : Nononononononono!!!

Police 2 : Yes, you are ! You're arrested for child abuse and being violent! That's it, you're in jail for 10 years !

Evil Boris : I WILL COME BACK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(silent moment for 1 minute)

Caillou : So, we're moving away ?

Doris : Yes, we are. I don't want to be married to a psychoman.

Caillou : I deserve to die ?

Doris : No, you don't. You deserve to live like everybody else on Earth, except for that psychoman.

Caillou : Thanks. You're the best mommy i've never had in my life !

(While they're on car, a song can be heard, The Breakup Song).

We had broken up for good just an hour before Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah And now I'm staring at the bodies as they're dancing 'cross the floor Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah And then the band slowed the tempo and the music took me down Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah It was the same old song, with a melancholy sound Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah

They don't write 'em like that anymore They just don't write 'em like that anymore

We'd been living together for a million years Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah But now it feels so strange out in the atmospheres Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah And then the jukebox plays a song I used to know Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah And now I'm staring at the bodies as they're dancing so slow Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah

They don't write 'em like that anymore They don't write 'em like that anymore Oh

Hey Now I wind up staring at an empty glass Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah 'Cause it's so easy to say that you'll forget your past Ah ah ah, ah ah ah ah ah

They don't write 'em like that anymore, no They just don't write 'em like that anymore They don't write 'em like that anymore They just don't write 'em like that anymore They just don't, no, they don't No, no, uh-uh

[end of the song]

Doris : There we are, our new home.

Caillou : Wow, it's very beautiful !

2 weeks later...

Doris : Caillou, i have a surprise for you !

Caillou : Yes, mommy ?

Doris : We have a special guest today, i met a new family and they're very nice.

Caillou : Wow, that's so cool !

Doris : Yes, i understand.

Mrs Lajeunesse : Hello little boy, my name is Julianna Lajeunesse. I'm from Quebec. Nice to meet you !

Caillou : Oh hi, my name is Caillou. Nice to meet you too !

Doris : Caillou, me and the family have to talk. You can go for a walk for now.

Caillou : I love walking, and ok, i'll be going for walk. See you later !

[while walking]

Caillou : *cries* Why am i bald ? *hic* Ugh... Anyways... i will be neutral as for now...

[Caillou is walking and his tears has been gone]

Caillou : Woah! Who the hell is that! [he is surprised] Oh uh... hello girl...

Mailie : Hello.

Caillou : M-m-my name is Caillou, and what is your n-n-name ?

Mailie : My name is Mailie, nice to meet you.

Caillou : I've been on Youtube and everyone was making fun of me. "Grounded videos".

Mailie : Oh...

Caillou : And, my dad is a monster, he said that i deserve to die and that i'm a bald "peace of crap".

Mailie : Don't listen to him, go with me.

Caillou : Ok !

[While walking with Mailie]

Mailie : You know, i love this restaurant...

Caillou : Oh my god ! Chuck'e'cheese !

Mailie : Ya, the pizzas are good in this restaurant !

Caillou : Wow ! I love those plushies ! Oh my GOD ! THERE IS CHOCOLATE ! CANDIES, PIZZAS, BURGERS, HOT-DOGS, AND SONIC FRENCH FRIES!!!!!!!

Mailie : You must like candies.

Caillou : Yeah, they're delicious !

Mailie : Yummy yum!

Caillou : Mailie, do you know Evil Boris ?

Mailie : Yes, i know him. He has escaped from jail.

Caillou : WHAT ?!!!

Mailie : Yeah... I know, it's shocking to hear about.

Caillou : WE HAVE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT !

Mailie : The only way is to kill him before it is too late.

Caillou : B-but ? We must find help.

Mailie : We should find help...

Caillou : Wait a second... Why there is a portal ?

Mailie : We should go in it.

Caillou : Mkay.

[They're traveling the portal]

Caillou : Wait, where are we ?

Mailie : I don't know. Wait, isn't it South Park ?

Caillou : South Park ?! What is it ?

Mailie : South Park is a world where kids are swearing.

Caillou : Wow, it's seem to be annoying.

Mailie : I understand.

Stan : Who the hell are they ?

Kyle : I don't know.

Mailie : What ?! Stan and Kyle ?!

Kyle : Yeah? It's us...

Stan : Who are you ?

Mailie : Mailie.

Stan : Nice name, cutie.

Caillou : Did he call you "cutie" ?

Stan : And that kid is Caillou ?

Caillou : I'm Caillou, i know i'm bald.

Stan : Exactly, you're bald.

Kyle : Why are peoples always come to our world ?

Mailie : Cause we need your help.

Kyle : Cartman will says no.

Mailie : We don't freaking care about Cartman's opinion !

Stan : Ya, Mailie's right. Cartman is a bitch and a fatass. We shouldn't be his friend.

Caillou : What is a bitch ?

Stan : You're too young to know those things, young boy.

Mailie : Why don't we explain things to my friend ? He is bullied in Go!Animate.

Stan : What is Go!Animate ?

Mailie : Your alternate world, where everybody are animated.

Stan : That's very confusing, cause we're animated too in our world.

Kyle : Ya. Stan's right.

Caillou : My dad keep bullying me. He never said to me that he loves me, he always says : "I hate you, peace of crap. You deserve to die."

Kyle : Your dad isn't a good father. A good father should complimenting their kids and should protect them from strangers!

Caillou : My father always bullying me.

Kyle : ... And your father shouldn't bullying you, just because you're bald. You're beautiful no matters you are.

Caillou : But, why peoples are making fun of me by making videos about me getting grounded, assaulted or executed by my own parents ?

Stan : They're idiots.

Mailie : They're just videos, they're not true.

Kyle : Yeah, they aren't trues.

Mailie : Ok, let's go to our world !

[They're in Go!Animate world]

Kyle : What the hell is that world ?!!

Stan : Eeek, we're uglies !

Evil Boris : Well-well-well, isn't it Caillou ?

Mailie : Oh fuck, not him.

Stan : Who the hell are you ?

Evil Boris : I'M EVIL BORIS AND THE FATHER OF THAT BALD KID!!! I'M GOING TO KILL HIM. FINALLY, MY DREAM WILL COME TRUE!

Kyle : It won't come true, you're just a idiot.

Evil Boris : COME-ON, YOU WILL NEVER ARREST ME! I'M THE KING OF THE WORLD! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!

Stan : Shut the fuck up, you bastard!

Evil Boris : FUCK YOU ALL! YOU DESERVE ALL TO DIE!!

Caillou : Dad, just stop it. You're mean.

Evil Boris : WHAT DID YOU SAY ? WHAT DID YOU JUST-

Mailie : Leave my friends alone.

Evil Boris : What did the bitch says ?

Mailie : You're the one who is bullying the others, and you deserve hell. I'm calling Jesus on you.

Evil Boris : OH NO ! NOT JESUS THE FUCKING CRAP !!! I'M THE KING, HE CAN'T GET ME FOREVER. MUHAHAHAHA!

Mailie : You just pretend to be the king to have attention.

Evil Boris : MY PLAN IS NOT OVER ! I WILL BE BACK SOON! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Mailie : Go ahead and run like a baby...

Kyle : I'm going to kick Evil Boris's ass !

Evil Boris : DON'T YOU DARE TO KICK MY ASS !

[He kick Evil Boris's ass]

Evil Boris : OUCHOUCHOUCHOUCH!!!! OHOHOHOHOHOHO, KYLE, HOW DARE YOU KICK MY ASS!!! THAT'S IT, YOU ARE GROUNDED FOR 1000000 YEARS! GO TO YOUR ROOM RIGHT NOW AND DO NOT COME BACK FOR ONE YEAR!

Kyle : Fortunately, you're not my mom. That's it, i'm calling my mom. She's the best jew mom ever !

Stan : What the hell are you talking about, Kyle ? Do you remember that we're in the alternate world ?

Kyle : My mom can teleport anywhere she wants. She has super-powers.

Kyle's mom : THAT'S IT EVERYONE! WE'RE GOING TO WAR VERSUS EVIL BORIS!!!

Kyle : Ya! We're all with you, Mom !

Mailie : Jesus Christ, i hate wars.

Caillou : Oh no! Not a war !

Mailie : JESUS!!! HELP US ALL! PLEASE! *cries*

Caillou : We had to help Kyle's mom.

Mailie : YOU THINK A WAR IS A GOOD IDEA ? LIKE IN THE MOVIE WHEN SHE MADES A WAR BETWEEN CANADIANS AND AMERICANS? YOU THINK THE WAR WILL REPAIR THE MISTAKES HE MADE? NO ! IT WILL BE WORSE THAN I IMAGINED! DON'T YOU SEE, A WAR CAN KILL A LOT OF KIDS AND FAMILIES. ALSO, THEY'RE THE REASON WHY SO MUCH PEOPLES ARE DYING !!! THIS IS FUCKED UP HERE! JESUS CAN REPAIR THOSE! OH MY GOD!!! I'M TIRED OF THIS CONFLICT !!!

Stan : Wow... Mailie... Calm down...

Mailie : WHY? THERE IS ALWAYS WARS ANYWHERE I GO!!! WHY SHOULD WE BATTLE JUST FOR THIS ?!! WHY, WHY ? WILL IT FIX IF WE'RE DOING A WAR AGAIN ? I DON'T THINK SO! OH MY GOD, JESUS, I'M CRYING LOUDER THAN I THOUGHT!!!!

Stan : Mailie, before you say one word, just, calm down... Screaming is the solution? I don't think so. And second of all, it will sound gross but i love you.

Mailie, Caillou, Kyle, Kyle's Mom, Evil Boris and all of Go!Animate's and South Park's peoples : WHAT?!!!!!

Mailie : Are you serious, Stan ?

Stan : Ya, i'm serious. You're so beautiful than i imagined.

Mailie : That's so cute.

Evil Boris : WOW!! EWWW!!! WHAT KIND OF KIDS ARE YOU TO LOVE A GIRL, THAT'S SOUND STUPID!

Stan : Shut up, Boris! Now, Mailie, i always wanted to ask you that question. Will you be my girlfriend?

Mailie : Yes! I would!

[Stan and Mailie kiss]

Everyone *GASP*

[10 seconds of silence]

Kyle : What the hell just happened ?

Evil Boris : WELL, THAT WAS THE DISGUSTING THING I'VE NEVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!!!

Jesus : Everyone spread out!

Stan : Jesus !

Mailie : Finally !

Caillou : Yeah !!! Finally !

Jesus : Now, everyone calm down. I've seen everything you did and heard you said. And, as for Evil Boris, you will be send in Hell for the rest of your life. With the powers of god, i'm sending you to hell. Yayayayayyoyuak! Poochiboom!

Evil Boris : NOOOOOO!!!!!!! I WILL BE BACK-BACK-BACK-BACK SOON!!!

Mailie : Wow.. That was weird.

Jesus : As for Mailie, i give her powers, immortality is her power.

Everyone : Wow...

Stan : That's so cool ! My girlfriend is immortal!

Jesus : ... And she can stay in South Park for the rest of her life!

South Park peoples : Hurray!

Jesus : As for Caillou, he will be placed with a new family since Doris has passed away.

Caillou : Doris has passed away?

Jesus : Yes, she died, it's been 5 minutes ago.

Caillou : Anyways, who is the new family ?

Jesus : Nice Boris's family.

Caillou : Wow, thank you, Jesus !

Jesus : You're welcome.

Kyle : Sure, lucky, Caillou.

Caillou : Thanks, Kyle.

Kyle : Surely pleasure, my friend.

[Mailie waked up]

Mailie : WOW!! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT DREAM!!!

Stan : Mailie, are you ok ?

Mailie : Yes, i am ! Just a weird dream about our childhood, remember it ?

Stan : Yes, i do. I do really.

Mailie : Anyways, can we go dinner ?

Stan : Yes ! And last question, will you marry me ?

Mailie : Yes !

The End.