Cool Rap Wars/Roald Dahl vs. Doctor Seuss

Announcer: Cool Rap Wars! Roald Dahl! Vs! Doctor Seuss! Battle!

Roald: It's me the man who created everyone's childhood. Against the man who dead yet still is getting cancelled. I rap hot flow while you can't even talk. So beating you in a rap battle would be a cakewalk. You make political commentaries disguised as books for kids. There's a reason me and Disney canned the Gremlins. If you're any of my famous characters, you're Mr. Twit! Because I kicked you, I should call you Doctor Bucket.

Dr.Seuss: I made stories with good morals and have so many classics you have two bad disney movies written by dumb asshats. lets not forget Willy Wonka starring Johnny Depp. you turned him into Michael Jackson with creepiness through length. and mention your disaster The BFG. you rurned down Robin Williams for a schmuck from Intimacy and James and the Giant Peach was pointless with a cast not funny ran by Tim's darkness. admit it Dahl I destroyed you full because people only believe you are just Roald Dull

Roald: At least I didn’t make Mike Myers look scary. And we know you have a boner for Jim Carrey! And all of your books have secret agendas. Like Horton Hears a Who is about Japan, great idea. While my movies are as wild as Gene. And I made children terrified, that I did mean. It's me the man who made Willy Wonka while you made Turtle Hitler. Don't rap anymore Seuss I'm a heavy hitter! So all the places you can see and do? Well I just beaten you!

Dr.Seuss: Don't get me started I'll go Matilda on your ass cause I am the Cat of this Elevator Glass. At least Green Eggs and Ham was a an amazing shock. You roped in George Clooney for a creepy Fantastic Mr. Fox. And now i hear your getting a wonka prequel that must be a shame and new roald dahl stuff for netflix you must be rolling in your grave. and you may been finished and know this will end by the fact people confuse you for Roald Amundsen. I've destroyed you Dahl go back to your den but ''Don't cry because you lost. Smile because it happened.''

Dahl: At least I am not a racist who worked with even more racists! Those Private Snaufu shorts are so basic. You let Illumination ruin Grinch and the Lorax. So my raps are stinging you right in your thorax. You despise children but you wrote for them. Jim Henson's show was the pinnacle of boredom. And the Great Butter Battle is literally nuclear war. Wow you love letting political context soar. So go and place your back against the wall. Because like in real life, you just got cancelled.

(Suddenly Maurice Sendak appears)

Maurice Sendak: (about to say something) Nope I got nothing sorry Seuss maybe next time (he then walks over to the other children book authors who wanted a cameo including E.B. White, Eric Carle, Judy Blume, Beverly Clearly, and Mo Willems

Dr,Seuss: O...K well you should have gotten back in your plane and fly back to WW2. Even the Sneetches were a lot better than you. I made a christmas classic you made kids turn into rats. you look augustus gloop if he wasn't too fat. What the hell is Eso Trot it sounds disease from a fairy and mention act like a child yet you say Adults can be scary. Your just a sad fox in socks whose run out of ideas did you steal them from your kids who are probably driving a prius It's over Dahl you been dropped on the floor dead now go be like horton and go hatch an egg