Avenue Q Presents Grouch Trailer

This is a trailer of Avenue Q Presents Grouch. Almost all the dialogue and scenes are the same as the ones from the SNL Grouch skit. [We see footage of New York City, then we see Osmar and another garbageman working on some trash.]

Garbageman: Damn, that smells straight like ass.

[Osmar opens a trash can]

Osmar: I don't know. I kind of like it.

Garbageman: Yeah? You like trash so much, why don’t you live in it?

Osmar: Why don't you bite me?!

Garbageman: Damn, Osmar, why you such a grouch, man?

[Cut to narrative video]

Announcer: From the studio that brought you "Joker" and the twisted minds at Sesame Workshop, comes the next gritty antihero origin story.

[We then see Osmar talking to a therapist.]

Therapist: Why do you think you're always in such a bad mood?

[Osmar is then seen walking through the streets of Avenue Q.]

Osmar: That ain't me. Things are getting worse out there.

[Cut to TV news]

Pal Friendlies: Once friendly neighborhood of Avenue Q has now become a haven of crime and corruption. I'm Pal Friendlies, PTN News.

[Cut to Osmar walking on the street]

Osmar: Hookers and pimps on every corner.

[Cut to Snuffrod and Peggy Fawn]

Snuffrod: Now, look, Peggy dog, you one of Snuffrod's ho's, okay? And Snuffrod's ho's earn!

Peggy: I'm sorry, daddy.

Snuffrod: Bitch, you better shut your damn mouffagus!

[Cut to Osmar watching]

Osmar: People getting killed over nothing.

[Cut to an alley where where Verne and Scotty are getting robbed]

Robber: Give me the teddy bear.

Verne: Scotty! Give it to him!

Scotty: Hell no, bitch!

[The robber attacks Scotty at hearing that.]

Scotty: (as he gets stabbed) NO!

[As Scotty collapsed, the robber steals his teddy and runs away with it.]

Verne: (holding the fatally stabbed Scotty) AAH! SCOTTYYYYY!!!

[Cut to Therapist]

Therapist: How does that make you feel?

Osmar: Grouchy.

[Cut to video clips of Osmar acting like Joker]

When everyone calls you trash, and everyone treats you like trash, why don't you just become trash?

Announcer: Variety asks, Did we need a dark take on "Oscar the Grouch?" "No," says the New York Times. Avenue Q outdid themselves this time, says the Wall Street Journal. The beloved Broadway stars are obsessing on streets like you've never seen before.

[Now we see Kieran walking down the hall with a concerned Torrie, Cinderelmo, Ginger, Budfire, Stanley, Sunspot and Fuzzle.]

Kieran: The police are powerless against these criminals. The government, the military- they can't do a damn thing! (holds up a clenched fist, in a determined tone) Somebody's gotta take matters into their own hands.

[The others looked at him in shock from hearing what he was saying.]

Torrie: You don't mean...

Kieran: I do.

[Cut to Toxie Jr. looking out to the crime-ridden city.]

Toxic Avenger: (voiceover) This is your chance to kick some ass.

[We then see Toxie Jr. viciously attacking the robber that stole Scotty's teddy.]

Toxic Avenger: (voiceover) Rip off someone's arm.

[Toxie Jr. ripped off the robber's knife arm with his brute strength, making the robber scream in excruciating pain.]

Toxic Avenger: (voiceover) Just like your dad.

[We then cut to police taking the badly wounded robber as a news reporter spoke.]

News Reporter: I'm standing here at the sight of what authorities believe is yet another vicious attack from the son of the Toxic Avenger. A state of emergency has been declared citizens are asked to remain in their homes.

[Cut to a female bird]

Heidi Gardner: Do you want to see this big bird dance?

[Cut to Alcindor Von Count getting himself some pills.]

Alcindor Von Count: One, two, three! Three pills for me!

[Cut to a caged Grizzle Ingrid and a suspicious-looking peddler woman glancing at each other eye-to-eye with interest.]

Female voice: (voiceover) I'd like to adopt this bird.

[Cut to the peddler woman speaking to a pet shop owner.]

Pet shop owner: You two are perfect for each other!

[Cut to the peddler woman leaving with Grizzle Ingrid.]

Evil-sounding female voice: (voiceover) You have no idea.

[Cut to Cookie Mongoloid, currently a hobo out on the streets, receiving a cookie before he devoured it.]

[Cut to Phil Phillips speaking with Sherman the Frog, Bixby Bear and Boppity.]

Phil Phillips: So you three are crack investigative reporters and a photographer for the New York Times. We could use guys like you to help us.

Sherman the Frog: You can count on us, Phil. We'll help put a stop to those crooks before you know it.

[Cut to Gaby running down an alley until she found herself at a dead end.]

Valerie Vomit: (voiceover) The time for running away is over!

[Cut to a group of dwarf-sized shadowy figures menacing towards her.]

Greaser Greg: (voiceover) Time to paint the town red! And this time, as we're originally supposed to be...

[Cut to the shadowy figures revealing themselves to be none other than the Garbage Pail Kids.]

Greaser Greg: (voiceover) Fucking horror monsters!

[Gaby made a bloodcurdling scream as the Garbage Pail Kids loomed closer to her.]

[Cut to Constable Griswald arresting a Mexican girl puppet.]

Mexican girl: I'm innocent! I didn't sell no crack! You only arrest me because I'm a Mexican and a puppet!

Griswald: (punches girl) Shut up, brownie! (shoves her in police car) Get in there!

Osmar: (singing creepily) Sunny Day...

Announcer: From director, Todd Phillips...

Osmar: (singing creepily) Sweeping the clouds away...

Announcer: ...and the writer of "P is for Potty."

Osmar: (singing creepily) On my way to where the air is sweet...

[Cut to an evil grinning Dead End Grouch outside the window of a taxicab passing by, holding a trashcan lid with the word "GROUCH" on it.]

Can you tell me how to get...

[Cut to Osmar speaking to a director as he was about to get onstage.]

Osmar: Would you do me one favor? Could you call me the Grouch?

Announcer: Brought to you by the letter R.

Osmar: Scram!