A Veritable Smorgasbord

A Veritable Smorgasbord is a song from Charlotte's Web. It is sung by Gwen the Goose and Templeton the Rat as Gwen tries to convince Templeton that he should go to the county fair because of the leftover food scraps.

Lyrics
Gwen the Goose: A fair is a veritable smorgasbord orgasbord orgasbord

After the crowds have ceased

Each night when the lights go out

It can be found on the ground all around

Oh, what a ratly feast!

Why, a fair has enough disgusting leftover food to satisfy a whole army of rats!

Templeton: Is this true? Is this appetizing yarn of yours true?

Will I find:

Melon rinds and bits of hot dogs

Cookie crumbs and rotten cotton candy

Melted ice cream, mustard dripplings

Moldy goodies everywhere?

Gwen the Goose: Yes, yes!

Templeton: Lots of popcorn, apple cores

Banan peels and soggy sandwiches

And gobs of gorgeous gook to gobble at the fair?

Gwen the Goose: Yes, yes, yes!

Templeton: I like high living... what you say tempts me!

Gwen the Goose: It's true. Go to the fair, Templeton. You will find that it will surpass your wildest dreams!

Templeton: You mean tin cans with particles of tunafish stickin' to 'em? Greasy paper bags stuffed with rotten eggs?

Gwen the Goose: Yep, yep, yep. True, true, true!

Templeton: That's enough, don't tell me anymore! I'm going!

Both: A fair is a veritable smorgasbord orgasbord orgasbord

After the gates are shut

Each night when the lights go out

It can be found on the ground all around

That's where a rat can glut, glut, glut, glut!