YTP: Superdooperasdfcompmovie

Transcript
(Intro Skit)

Citizen 1: (spots a flying saucer) Alien attack!

Rebel: Throw the CHEEEEEEEEEESE!!!!! (throws cheese at flying saucer)

(everyone stares)

Alien: (Baby's voice) You Fool.

(The Title theme plays)

(static)

Man on Left: Hey guy, smell my flower.

Man on Right: (guy sniffs flower) Mmmmmmm

(A monster comes out of the man on the Left's Flower)

Man on Right: LOL!

Announcer: LEVEL UP!!

(static)

Man: Steven, I got to ask! How the devil do you keep your house so clean?

Steven: Well that's easy man! I'm half cow!

Man: Holy marry mother of...

(static)

Narrator: And now... PINEAPPLES.

Man: This does not help.

(static)

Woman 1: My boyfriend said I'm the most beautiful girl in the world!

Woman 2: (holding a knife) Hey, you wanna play catch the knife? (gets stabbed to the ground)

Woman 1: *demonic voice* THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!

(static)

Guy 1: Hey. it says 'Gullible' on the ceiling. (AVGN's voice) Again!

(guy 2 looks up, the ceiling says 'Gullible')

Guy 2: Oh...

(The guy on the left grabs the guy on the right's lungs)

Guy 2: Aw, come on!!!

Guy 1: Gullible.

(static)

Mother 1: Hey kids! I brought you some cookies!

Kids: [cheer]

Mother 2: JIMMY!

(The woman and the kids give poker faces.)

Mother 2: CLEAN YOUR ROOM!

(static)

Voiceover: Coming This Summer.

President: Dammit Jenkins, a giraffe will never be president.

Jenkins: Yeah, you're probably right!

Cow: Yeah, me neither!

Voiceover: The Giraffe that wasn't Preseident... Rated R!

(static)

Little girl: Marmite, have you seen my pony?

Marmite: Yes.

(The little girl smiles.)

Horse: *Runs over to Marmite and tramples him* WHERE?!?!

(static)

Man: Marmite, why does no one like you?

(man bursts into flames)

Man: Oh yeah...

Marmite: (Tie's voice) (Sinister laugh)

(static)

Man on phone: Hey, uh, how do I get to your place again?

(slight mumbling from phone)

Man on phone: Ok, thanks.

(The man hangs up the phone and his car crashes into a wall.)

Dude: Classic.

(static)

Boss: Steve, I'm giving you a promotion.

(Steve smiles.)

("Nostalgia Critic" in black, bold letters briefly appears across screen)

Voiceover: (AVGN's voice) Nostalgia Critic.

Boss: Yep, now you're fired.

(Steve frowns.)

(static)

(John opens a door.)

John: Honey, I'm home-- MARMITE! What are you DOING?!

(Marmite appears in bed with John's wife.)

Marmite: I'm sleeping with your wife, John.

John: Uh, yeah...you are.

Cow: Yeah, me neither!

(static)

Customer : I'smory, what is that for a restaurant i mean this thing is still alive.

Lobster: He's on to us, commence the pitching!

Customer: No, no! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...

Man: I'll save you! Tree powers, Activate!

(The man turns into a tree.)

Man: (Tom's voice) This isn't working!

(static)

Man: You gotta help me man! My tie is evil and it's gonna kill meeee...

(The other man backs away)

Man: Please don't hurt me...

Tie: (Joker's voice) *Sinister laugh*

(static)

Man: Hello, parking meter!

Meter: (AVGN's voice) I'm the fucking nerd!

(The man becomes surprised.)

(static)

Man: I baked you a pie!

Kid: Oh, boy! What flavor?

Man: Pie flavor.

Pie: But it's opposite day.

(Both men and the kids turn into pies)

Man: (Man on right's voice) OWW!! What the hell is wrong with you!?!?

(static)

(A song plays in the background.)

Girl: I like singing!

Boy: I like dancing!

I Like Trains Kid: I like trains.

Narrator: SUDDENLY PINEAPPLES.

(Pineapples appeared but I Like Train Kid got confused)

I Like Trains Kid: (Man's voice) Hmm.

(static)

(A son is holding a bowl with salad when The Salad Punching Dad hits him knocking the salad out of his hand. He starts punching it)

Son: Aw, what is wrong with you?! Stop it, Cut it out, Dad! I don't want thi--

Salad Punching Dad: I AM PUNCHING YOUR SALAD!!!

Son: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!

(static)

Guy 1: Oh, no, I spilled my milk!

Guy 2: You've killed us all!

Guy 1: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

(House floods with milk and drowns both mens then gargle)

(Guys grave is shown title Death by "Milk drown")

Man: Doctor, I think I might be a homosexual!

Doctor: How can you tell?

(Man vomits Rainbow)

RAAAAAAIINNBOOWWWSS

Doctor: (Tomska's voice) Oh that was really on call for!

(static)

(Script in Progress)

Clown: Haha! They said I could never teach llama to drive!

Llama: BAAAAAAAAA--

Clown: No, Llama, Nooo!

(The Llama drives clown off a cliff.)

Narrator: SUDDENLY...

(Car crashes and llama runs around screen)

Mine Turtle: Hello!

(Script in Progress)

(Ranger plays trumpet)

Policeman: Hey, you got a license for that?

Ranger: What are you - A man? Or a mouse?

(blows trumpet into his ear, like shooting himself with a gun, killing the Ranger himself)

(static)

Singers: ''♪ Desmond The Moon Bear! ♪''

Desmond: How did I get here?

Cow: Yeah, me neither!

(static)

Waffle: Did somebody say "Waffles?"

Guy: No.

Waffle: I have brain damage!

Muffin: But I wanna die!

(static)

Guy: Joey, did you eat my sandwich?

Joey: I am your sandwich.

(Guy swallows Joey)

(Joey's grave is shown in words 'Swallowed to death')

(static)

Potato Killer: (fromasdfmovie2) Die potato!

Potato: Noooooooo!!

I Like Trains Kid: I like trains.

Potato Killer: Oh no no no wait-

(potato killer and potato get hit by train)

(I Like Trains Kid smiles)

(static)

Guy 1: Here, hold this.

(Sticks sword into Guy 2's stomach and walks away)

Guy 2: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

(static)

Father: Hey, son! Catch! (throws ball)

Billy: Ok, dad! I'm going to catch it! I'm going to ca- (gets squashed by ball which never changed size to match perspective)

(Billy's grave was shown)

Mother: Billy, Noo!

(static)

Snarky Man: Nice hat.

Magician Guy: Thanks!

Snarky Man: I was being sarcastic.

Magician Guy: Well, I stole your face!

(snarky guy slaps on his blank area where his face was and he collapsed to the grounded)

Magician Guy: (Guy 2's voice) Hehe (zooms in), comedy.

(Script in progress)

Guy 1: Wow, this game is so realistic!

Guy 2: That's not a game!

Guy 1: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

(static)

Guy: Why won’t this damn fax machine work?!

(fax machine rumbles and turns into a giant robot)

Machine: (David's robotic voice) Hello, I'm David!

(static)

Guy 1: Pffft. Screw gravity!

(floats away, guy 2 smiles)

Guy 1: (Chris Bingham's voice) Help! I'm...stuck on the ceiling...

(static)

Trivia

 * AVGN spoken word "Again" was reference to Superman 64 in the AVGN episode.