I, Scott Pilgrim/Ramona

Ramona is the first episode of I, Scott Pilgrim.

Transcript
He slaps her. The room goes quiet and Kim looks at Scott with a totally blank expression. It suddenly cuts to Scott walking home with a black eye and holding his nose with a piece of bloody tissue. He walks into an apartment building and into his room where Wallace Wells is reading a newspaper. Wallace looks around the apartment.
 * Stephen: Wait, you're dating a high schooler?
 * Scott: Yeah, so?
 * Stephen: Isn't that underage?
 * Scott: Uh... Maybe?
 * Kim: That's not cool, Scott. I mean, you're, like, forty.
 * Scott: I'm twenty-two, Kim. Twenty-two.
 * Kim: So?
 * Scott: So, she's seventeen. There's not that big a gap between us.
 * Neil: You haven't, like... "done it"... have you...?
 * Scott: She almost held my hand once but she got embarrassed and pulled away. Why?
 * Neil: That would be gross.
 * Stephen: Have you kissed her?
 * Scott: Nah, almost hand holding is as far as we've gotten.
 * Kim: Sounds like one hell of a relationship...
 * Scott: Shut up.
 * Neil: So how did you meet her?
 * Scott: She dropped her books and I picked them up for her.
 * Neil: What's her name again?
 * Scott: Knives.
 * Kim: ...That was the shortest story I've ever heard in my life.
 * Scott: It wasn't meant to be that long.
 * Stephen: Well, yeah, but I mean... You just picked up books for her and now you're dating her? That's not weird at all to you?
 * Scott: No, not really. Rom-coms do that all the time.
 * Kim: Do you realize this is real life or have you finally snapped and you're no longer able to tell the difference between reality and fiction?
 * Scott: If it’s fiction, then I won’t be able to feel the pain when I slap you.
 * Kim: Wait for What?
 * Scott: Well that was dumb.
 * Scott: Before you hear any lies, I'm dating a high schooler and I haven't done anything with her.
 * Wallace: Is he cute?
 * Scott: Ha ha ha... very funny.
 * Wallace: Does this mean we'll have to stop sleeping together?
 * Scott: Do you see any other beds?
 * Wallace: Huh. You're totally my bitch forever.
 * Scott: More like victim.