What Makes Toons Tick? 2 transcript

[All-New Tiny Toon Adventures Theme Music In Background]

Buster: We’re lucky we’re not confessin’ 

our show’s now back in session 

I’ve always learned my lesson

Babs: I’m having lots of fun

Plucky: I’m filled with elation, I’m back on television

Shirley: for the next incarnation, I’m not calling up a nun

Professor Daffy: welcome back to ACME Looniversity for another school year

Buster: wow, a test

Babs: I don’t need rest

Plucky: I’m not living in fear

Buster, Babs and other Tiny Toons gang members: we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little looney, it’s All-New Tiny Toon Adventures and we’re number 1

Buster and Babs: now the show has begun……

Prologue: Buster and Babs’s introduction
Buster: “Hiya, toonsters, I’m Buster Bunny,”

Babs: “And I’m Babs Bunny.”

Buster and Babs: “No relations.”

Buster: “Welcome to another edition of What Makes Toons Tick?, where we show all new episode shorts, featuring Babs and I, along with Plucky Duck, Hamton Pig, Dizzy Devil and the rest of our gang.”

Babs: “And now, on with the show.”

Episode short number 1: The Grounded Duck

Scene 1: ACME Looniversity/Professor Daffy’s classroom
Hamton: “So, Plucky, are you excited about the sleepover and movie pizza party at my house this weekend?”

Plucky: “Of course I am, Hamton, I’ve been getting prepared for this myself.”

Hamton: “That’s good, (he points right at the brown paper bag.) what’s in the paper bag?”

Plucky: “It’s a secret surprise for Buster, we’ll just wait ‘til we get to class.”

Plucky and Hamton head off to Professor Daffy’s classroom.

Professor Daffy: “Good morning, fellow students, welcome to another school year of ACME Looniversity, I’m your English professor, Professor Bugs is still your math professor, while Professor Porky is still your history professor, Professor Pepe is still your French professor, Professor Lola is still your health class professor, Granny is still your school nurse, Taz is still your school principal, Elmer is still your school janitor and Coach Sam is still your gym coach.”

(Brief Pause……)

Professor Daffy: “Now right before we begin the vocabulary test, let’s listen to what Principal Taz needs to say.”

Principal Taz: (over P.A. system) “Good morning, ACME Looniversity, Friday today, please stand for Pledge of Allegiance.”

All Students and Professor Daffy: “I pledge allegiance, to the flag, and the United States of America, and to the republic, for which it stands, 1 nation, under God, with liberty and justice for all.”

Principal Taz: (over P.A. system): “You can be seated.”

Professor Daffy: (handing out the vocabulary test papers) “Okay, here are your vocabulary tests, you can all begin.”

Buster, Babs, Plucky, Hamton, Shirley, Fifi, Elmyra, Montana Max, Banjo Possum and Li’l Sneezer begin doing their vocabulary work, ‘til they’re all finished.

Professor Daffy: “Okay, it’s time to check for your results.”

The students give Professor Daffy their vocabulary test papers and he checks on them.

Professor Daffy: “Well, it looks like you got every single word correct, and Plucky, you did absolutely perfect.”

Plucky: “Thanks a bunch, Professor Daffy.”

Professor Daffy: “Anytime, now off you go to Professor Lola’s health class.”

They all head off to Professor Lola’s classroom.

Professor Lola’s classroom
Professor Lola: “Good morning, students.”

All Students: “Good morning, Professor Lola.”

Professor Lola: “Now today, students, we’re gonna discuss the human digestive system, now who would like to offer an explanation? (Buster raises his right hand.) yes, Buster?”

Buster: “Well, there are 2 little parts inside your body that can help you breathe, and they’re called the lungs and the diaphragm, and when they get irritated, they create a jerky manner called hiccups.”

Professor Lola: “Exactly right, Buster, now here are your tests, you can all begin writing.”

They all begin writing, then take them over to Professor Lola.

[School Bell Ringing]

Professor Lola: “There goes the bell for lunch, have a good lunch, students.”

All of the ACME Looniversity students head on down on their way to the ACME Looniversity cafeteria lunchroom.

ACME Looniversity cafeteria lunchroom
Buster, Babs, Plucky, Hamton, Shirley and Fifi are sitting at the exact same school cafeteria lunch table, while Plucky is telling them his usual jokes.

Plucky: “What’s black and white, black and white and bright yellow all over?”

(Brief Pause)

Plucky: “2 skunks fighting over a banana split!”

Plucky: [Laughing Uncontrollably]

Babs: “Very hilarious, Plucky, you’re always trying to crack everybody up.”

Plucky: “Best chance of the ultimate joke and prank master: startle somebody else.”

Plucky reaches into his brown paper bag, then takes out a plastic container, which looks like a veggie chips container.

Plucky: “Care for some veggie chips, Buster?”

Buster: “Why sure, of course, Plucky.”

Buster takes the lid off the container, but it turns out to be the red snake in a blue can trick.

Buster: “Yikes!”

Buster faints to the floor.

Babs: “Buster, Buster, are you alright?”

Hamton: “Say something, Buster.”

Fifi: “Anyzing, please say anyzing.”

Buster: “Whoa, that was real terrifying.”

Yosemite Sam/Coach Sam: “Alright, who in tarnation is responsible for that red snake in a blue can trick?!?”

All Students (except Plucky): “Plucky Duck.”

Yosemite Sam/Coach Sam: “Plucky Duck, Principal Taz’s office, pronto!”

Yosemite Sam/Coach Sam takes Plucky down to Principal Taz’s office.

Principal Taz’s office
Plucky: “Okay, so I pushed it way too far with the red snake in a blue can prank on Buster this afternoon, so what’s the deal?”

Principal Taz: “Plucky, you bad naughty duck, you get 15 minutes detention.”

Plucky: “No, please, not that, anything but that, I didn’t mean it, please don’t call my parents!”

Principal Taz: “Too late, Plucky.”

Principal Taz dials Plucky’s parents, Roger and Maria’s telephone numbers, then calls them right away.

Principal Taz: “Hello? please ground Plucky now.”

Fade to a black screen…….

Scene 2: Plucky’s house
Plucky: “This just isn’t fair, I was trying to offer Buster a container of veggie chips, but it didn’t turn out so good.”

Roger: “Plucky Alan Duck, you pushed it too far with the red snake in a blue can trick you played on Buster this afternoon, and for that, you’re grounded for 9 days, and the sleepover and movie pizza party you were supposed to be at Hamton’s house this weekend, forget about it.”

Plucky: “What?!? you can’t do that to me!”

Maria: “I’m afraid your father’s right, Plucky, what you did to Buster at school today wasn’t a good idea.”

Right after dinner and dessert meals, Plucky goes right upstairs to his bedroom and goes right into his bed.

Maria comes right up to check up on him.

Maria: “You know it’s not the end of the universe, Plucky, but we know you’re grounded for 9 days and you can still speak with Hamton on the wireless telephone and tell him to re-schedule his sleepover movie and pizza party for next Saturday evening.”

Plucky: “I guess I could live with that idea.”

Maria: “Okay, Plucky, your blue cell phone is on your night stand.”

Plucky picks up his blue cell phone, then dials Hamton’s telephone number.

Cut back to Hamton’s house………

[Wireless telephone ringing]

Hamton picks up the wireless telephone.

Hamton: (on the wireless telephone) “Hello? Plucky? is that you?”

Plucky: (on his blue cell phone) “Of course it’s me, Hamton, since I’m grounded for 9 days, do you think you can re-schedule your sleepover movie and pizza party for next Saturday evening?”

Hamton: (on the wireless telephone) “Yes, Plucky, of course I can do that.”

Plucky: (on his blue cell phone) “That’s good, what a relief, well, I’ll see you at school tomorrow morning and afternoon and next Saturday as well, goodbye, Hamton.”

Hamton: (on the wireless telephone) “Goodbye, Plucky.”

Plucky and Hamton both hang up their wireless telephones.

Plucky: “There, that sure took care of that.”

Maria: “Oh that’s good.”

Plucky goes right to bed and falls asleep.

The very next morning….

Plucky: “I’m gonna get myself prepared and go to Buster’s Burrow and apologize for playing that joke and prank I played on Buster that afternoon.”

Plucky goes right outta his bedroom, eats a real good breakfast meal, brushes his teeth (real ducks don’t have teeth), then heads out on his way to Buster’s Burrow.

Buster’s Burrow
Plucky: “Hey, Buster, there you are, look, I’m terribly sorry about the red snake in a blue can prank I played on you yesterday afternoon, and I promise I’ll never do it again, even though I’m the hilarious type.”

Buster: “Hey, it’s no big deal, Plucky, I’m pretty sure it was just a real big mistake you just made.”

Hamton: “Well what do you know? Plucky apologized to Buster for what he did to him yesterday afternoon.”

Shirley: “Now that’s a relief.”

Morning and evening go by, and everybody’s now awake and back at ACME Looniversity.

Back at ACME Looniversity
Hamton: “So, Plucky, would you be prepared for the sleepover movie and pizza party at my house next Saturday evening?”

Plucky: “Of course, Hammy old pal, I would like to come over to your house next Saturday evening, I even thought about it myself lately.”

Plucky and Hamton go back in Professor Daffy’s classroom.

Back in Professor Daffy’s classroom

Professor Daffy: “Yesterday, students, we spoke about the proper rules about fire safety, so does anybody know the rules of fire safety?”

Buster: “Hey, I know: stop, drop and roll.”

Professor Daffy: “Very good, Buster, it’s very important that you stop, drop and roll, now what other things are fire safety?”

Babs: “We all need to make sure the kitchen stoves, ovens and outdoor grills aren’t burning up.”

Hamton: “And if there’s real big fire flames, call 9-1-1, and the firemen come to our rescue.”

Professor Daffy: “Good, very good, well done, splendid, now off you go to Professor Porky’s class.”

They all go out on their way to Professor Porky’s classroom.

Inside Professor Porky’s classroom
Professor Porky: “G-G-G-G-G-Good morning, cleeuh-cleeuh, students.”

All ACME Looniversity students: “Good morning, Professor Porky.”

Professor Porky: “Let’s all begin our entire day with a few math problems, what’s 24 X 71?” Buster raises his right hand.

Professor Porky: “Yes, Buster?”

Buster: “1,704.”

Professor Porky: “Geeuh, geeuh, perfect, right answer, what’s 46 X 57?”

Hamton raises his right hand.

Professor Porky: “Yes, Hamton?”

Hamton: “2,622.”

Professor Porky: “That’s exactly right, now what’s 29 X 68?”

Babs raises her right hand.

Professor Porky: “Yes, Babs?”

Babs: “1,972.”

Professor Porky: “Wonderful, very good, what’s 32 X 49?”

Plucky raises his right hand.

Professor Porky: “Yes, Plucky?” Plucky: “1,568.”

Professor Porky: “Exactly right, Plucky.”

Gogo appears right outta the cuckoo clock.

Gogo: “It’s lunchtime, everybody, cuckoo, cuckoo.”

Porky: “now off you students go to lunch, have a geeuh, geeuh, wonderful afternoon.”

All of the ACME Looniversity students go off to lunch in the school cafeteria lunchroom.

Plucky: “Well, now that my jokes and pranks are behind me right now, I can just enjoy my lunch with all of my good friends.”

Buster, Babs, Plucky, Hamton and the other ACME Looniversity students begin enjoying their lunch peacefully.

Meanwhile that afternoon back home near Hamton’s house, Plucky and Hamton are walking around with 1 another.

Hamton: “So, Plucky, are you prepared to come to the sleepover movie and pizza party at my house this Saturday evening?”

Plucky: “I sure am, Hamton, I’ve got all of my things packed for tomorrow evening, and my parents told me I’m ungrounded for my entire life.”

Hamton: “That’s good, bye, Plucky.” Plucky: “See you tomorrow evening, Hamton.”

Plucky and Hamton go back to their own houses and get some shuteye.

The very next morning at Plucky’s house, Plucky jumps outta his bed, eats a real good breakfast meal cleans up after himself, grabs his sleepover stuff and goes all the way to Hamton’s house.

Hamton’s house/the sleepover movie and pizza party
Hamton: “Hiya, Plucky, I’m so thrilled you could make it here on time.”

Plucky: “I know, Hamton, my parents told me I’m ungrounded, so right now, I can join the fun thrilled party.”

Plucky and Hamton enter Hamton’s house, and see Wade, Winnie, Uncle Stinky, Bubbie and Pappy, who are in the kitchen preparing the meatball and green pepper pizza for their dinner meal.

Wade: “Hamton, Plucky, you’re just in time for the sleepover movie and pizza party.”

Winnie: “Dinner won’t be ready ‘til 30 minutes is up, so how ‘bout you plug in the DVD player, Plucky?”

Plucky: “I’ll get to that.”

Plucky and Hamton go right into the living room and Plucky plugs in the DVD player.

Hamton: “There, it’s all plugged in and ready for the movie we’re gonna watch tonight.”

Plucky: “So what movie are we gonna watch tonight?”

Hamton: “The movie we’re gonna watch is called Tiny Toon Adventures: How I Spent My Vacation.”

Plucky: “Oh yeah, I remember that movie, to me, it was fun and thrilling at 1st, but then it turned out to be a bummer summer vacation, which of course I’m now back from, good riddance.”

[Timer On Microwave Beeping]

Winnie: “Ooh, I think that must be the meatball and green pepper pizza timer.”

Wade: “Uncle Stinky, would you go check the kitchen oven to see if it’s ready to be served?”

Uncle Stinky: [Grunting In Agreement]

Uncle Stinky goes right over to the kitchen oven and takes the now ready meatball and green pepper pizza outta there, then places it on 2 heating pads.

Plucky and Hamton line up to get their meatball and green pepper pizza slices.

Buster chooses to have a garden salad, since he’s a vegetarian like Babs is. They all go over to the living room with their dinner meals and watch a scene from Tiny Toon Adventures: How I Spent My Vacation.

Plucky: “Look, Hammy, here’s the cream of my collection: a pristine mint condition 1st printing of Immature Radioactive Samurai Slugs, number 1.”

Winnie: “Ooh now, Plucky, we don't allow Hamton to read comic books on family trips.”

Plucky: (sarcastically, gives the comic magazines to Hamton) “Sheesh, typical parents convinced comics will sabotage cerebellum.”

Hampton: (feeling nauseous) “It's not that, reading in the car always makes me [Gulps In Sickness] carsick.”

Plucky: “Here it comes, here it comes.”

The entire movie scene continues with Plucky trying to find something for Hamton to barf in, but to no avail.

Plucky: “No, Hamton, not on the comic!”

Hamton: [Barfing Sounds]

Plucky: “NOOOOOOO!”

Hamton: “I remember when that happened, it was so hilarious.”

Winnie: “Okay, everybody, it’s time to get ready for bed.”

Everybody gets into their pajama clothes and Plucky spends the entire night in Hamton’s room.

Later, everybody in ACME Acres is fast asleep.

The very next morning………

Plucky, Hamton and Buster are enjoying their breakfast meals with Winnie, Wade and Uncle Stinky.

Wade: “So, Hamton, how did you do at ACME Looniversity last Friday morning?”

Hamton: “Well, Dad, I solved lots of good math problems in Professor Daffy’s math class and I also answered lots of good questions in Professor Lola’s health class.”

Wade: “That sounds super exciting.”

Winnie: “I think our Hamton is getting smarter as always.”

Plucky: “If I wanna plan another house party, I may never wanna play another joke and prank again.”

Fade to a black screen…….

Cartoon Network Announcer: “Don’t go away, ‘cause All-New Tiny Toon Adventures will be right back, right after these commercial breaks.”

Commercial Break number 1

Commercial Break number 2