Toon TV 2 transcript

[All-New Tiny Toon Adventures Theme Music In Background]

Buster: We’re lucky we’re not confessin’ 

our show’s now back in session 

I’ve always learned my lesson

Babs: I’m having lots of fun

Plucky: I’m filled with elation, I’m back on television

Shirley: for the next incarnation, I’m not calling up a nun

Professor Daffy: welcome back to ACME Looniversity for another school year

Buster: there's a test

Babs: no more rest

Plucky: I’m not living in fear

Buster, Babs and other Tiny Toons gang members: we’re tiny, we’re toony, we’re all a little looney, it’s All-New Tiny Toon Adventures and we’re number 1

Buster and Babs: now the show has begun……

Prologue: The introduction
Buster: "Hiya, toonsters, I'm Buster Bunny,"

Babs: "and I'm Babs Bunny."

Buster and Babs: "No relation."

Buster: "Welcome to another edition of Toon TV, where we show 3 episode shorts like we did before."

Babs: "And now, on with the show."

Scene 1: The ACME Movie Studio
Plucky: "Ah, the ACME Movie Studio, nothing gets better than this 1, right, Hamton?"

Hamton: "Exactly right, Plucky, the reason why we're here is that we're making our very 1st comic book hero movie: Batduck and Decoy: The Motion Picture."

Plucky: "Then what are we waiting for? let's go."

Plucky and Hamton go right inside the ACME Movie Studio.

Jack Robertson: "Plucky, Hamton, you're here, come, right this way, please, your filming location awaits."

Plucky and Hamton change into their movie character costumes for the comic book hero transformation sequence and go straight to their filming location: the Duck Cave.

Jack Robertson: "Batduck and Decoy: The Motion Picture, take 1, and action."

[Beeping Sounds]

Plucky: "Just an ordinary day in ACME Acres, and nothing happening in sight."

[Signal Alarm Ringing]

Plucky: "Uh oh, I spoke to soon."

Hamton: "So did I."

Plucky: "This looks like a job for-"

Plucky transforms into Batduck.

Batduck: "Batduck!"

Hamton transforms into Decoy.

Decoy: "And Decoy!"

Batduck: "Come on, Decoy, to the Duck-Mobile!"

Batduck and Decoy spring into action and drive off in the Duck-Mobile.

Mr. Hitcher is now robbing the bank.

Mr. Hitcher: "Nothing can trap me right now."

Batduck: "Not so fast, you villainous fiend!"

Decoy: "Or face the power of Batduck and Decoy!"

Batduck: "Now, Decoy!"

Decoy: "You got it, Batduck!"

Batduck and Decoy begin fighting against Mr. Hitcher by using their karate punches and kicks and super powered weapons.

Mr. Hitcher; "Hey, I'm trapped, I can't get outta here!"

Batduck: "Alright, we won, we defeated him!"

Decoy: "Now the city town is safe and secure."

Mayor Bugs: "Congratulashuns, Batduck and Decoy, de city town is saved from Mistuh Hitcher's clutches, thanks tuh all of yuh hard wawhk around here."

Jack Robertson: "Cut, perfect, nice work, Plucky, Hamton, you guys can come right off the set right now."

Batduck and Decoy transform back into Plucky and Hamton, then they come right off the movie set.

Plucky: "Oh boy, I can hardly wait to see our perfectly made movie on the big movie screen."

Hamton: "So can I, Plucky, so can I."

Plucky and Hamton walk right back home to their separate houses.

Scene 2: The ACME Movie Theater
Professor Daffy: "Good evening, my dear good friends, welcome to the very 1st screening of Batduck and Decoy: The Motion Picture, so sit back, relax and enjoy the film."

The movie begins showing up on the big movie screen.

Plucky: "This is it, Hamton, all of our big scenes are coming right up."

Hamton: "I know they are, Plucky."

Plucky: "Just an ordinary day in ACME Acres, and nothing happening in sight."

[Signal Alarm Ringing]

Plucky: "Uh oh, I spoke to soon."

Hamton: "So did I."

Plucky: "This looks like a job for-"

Plucky transforms into Batduck.

Batduck: "Batduck!"

Hamton transforms into Decoy.

Decoy: "And Decoy!"

Batduck: "Come on, Decoy, to the Duck-Mobile!"

Batduck and Decoy spring into action and drive off in the Duck-Mobile.

Mr. Hitcher is now robbing the bank.

Mr. Hitcher: "Nothing can trap me right now."

Batduck: "Not so fast, you villainous fiend!"

Decoy: "Or face the power of Batduck and Decoy!"

Batduck: "Now, Decoy!"

Decoy: "You got it, Batduck!"

Batduck and Decoy begin fighting against Mr. Hitcher by using their karate punches and kicks and super powered weapons.

Mr. Hitcher; "Hey, I'm trapped, I can't get outta here!"

Batduck: "Alright, we won, we defeated him!"

Decoy: "Now the city town is safe and secure."

Mayor Bugs: "Congratulashuns, Batduck and Decoy, de city town is saved from Mistuh Hitcher's clutches, thanks tuh all of yuh hard wawhk around here."

Professor Bugs: "Wow, dey even casted me as de mayor in dis movie."

Buster: "Now let's go back home to get some shut eye."

All of them go back home to their separate houses/burrows to get some shut eye.

Fade to a black screen........

Scene 1: ACME Looniversity/Professor Daffy's classroom
Professor Daffy: "Alright, students, the title character played by Tom Hanks in the 1994 movie, Forrest Gump, was most popular for saying this quote."

Buster Raises his hand.

Buster: "Life is like a box of chocolates?"

Professor Daffy: "That's correct."

Hamton: [Chomping And Chewing Sounds]

Professor Daffy walks right over to Hamton who's eating cheese-itz and white cheddar popcorn in his class.

Professor Daffy: "Hamton Pig, right after all of my warnings, why did I catch you eating in class again?"

Hamton: "Buster and Plucky didn't warn me, you were just closing in on me."

Professor Daffy: "Is that really the best excuse I can offer?"

Hamton: "I couldn't help it, Professor Daffy, I was beginning to think about my snack hours and I was just minding my own business."

Hamton stands up from his chair and desk.

Professor Daffy leads Hamton right out in the ACME Looniversity School hallways.

Professor Daffy: "Maybe this nice little walk down to Principal Taz's office can help get your mind off your digestion system."

Professor Daffy and Hamton walk right down on their way to Principal Taz's office.

Inside Principal Taz's office
Principal Taz: "What this time? spitballs? paper airplanes? falling asleep in class? no homework over weekend again?"

Professor Daffy: "No, Taz, he was eating in class."

Principal Taz; "What you got to say for yourself, Hamton?"

Hamton: "Well, I was minding my own business thinking about my snack hours and well, here I was."

Principal Taz: "Hamton, Taz not punish you, Taz want you be more careful in future."

Hamton: "Easy for you to say."

Later on.........

Professor Daffy: "Taz, aren't you feeling well?"

Principal Taz: "Yes, Daffy, indeed."

Professor Daffy: "You let him go free at last? no detention? no extra homework? now cleaning erasers?"

Principal Taz: "He must have snack food cravings."

Professor Daffy: "The poor young pig must be really ill!"

Meanwhile in the ACME Looniversity hallways.......

Professor Daffy: "Hamton, Professor Lola will bring you in her office.”

Professor Lola: “Good idea, Daffy, come with me, Hamton.”

Hamton follows Professor Lola to her office.

Professor Lola: “Now, Hamton, I’ll say 1 word, and you say the other, you prepared now?”

Hamton: “I sure am.”

Professor Lola: “Green.”

Hamton: “Apples, I like them.”

Professor Lola: “Twisted.”

Hamton: “Cheese puffs.”

Professor Lola: “Blueberry.”

Hamton: “Cheese cake.”

Professor Lola: “Tell me, Hamton, do dream visions of snack foods ever disturb your slumber?”

Hamton: “When I’m in my bed at home, I chew on the corner of my pillow.”

Professor Lola: “Now fall asleep, when I snap my fingers, you wake up.”

Hamton: [Snoring Lightly]

[Sounds Of Fingers Snapping]

Professor Lola: “So, Hamton, what did that sound make you think about?”

Hamton: “Well, snap made me think about crackle, and crackle made me think about pop, then pop made me think about pop tarts.”

Professor Lola: “So you like all types of snack and lunch foods, right, Hamton?”

Hamton: “Yep, I sure do.”

Cut back to Professor Daffy and Principal Taz in the ACME Looniversity hallways…..

Principal Taz: “Taz just figured out nothing wrong with him.”

Professor Daffy: “Then he’s not ill after all.”

Hamton is now outside Professor Lola’s office….

Principal Taz: “How’d go in there, Hamton?”

Hamton: “It went well, we’ve had a super good conversation in here.”

Professor Daffy: “You know, Taz, I’ve been punishing Hamton a bit too much.”

Principal Taz: “Well, good thing you not too hard on him."

Hamton is writing I will not eat in class 28 times.

Principal Taz: "And 15 minutes of detention right after you’re finished."

Meanwhile again……….

Babs: [In Shock] "28 times?!?"

Buster: "Wow, you gotta know better than to eat in class, Hamton."

Hamton: "Yeah right, but I forgot, I think I'm sitting right down at a picnic table in the park and begin eating my snack foods."

Plucky: "Snack foods?"

Shirley: "Why yes, Plucky, Hamton keeps a snack bag in his lunch box, he's like, a treasure keeper."

Plucky: "And you sit with all of us at the picnic table in ACME Acres park as well?"

Hamton: "THat's exactly right, .that makes it the best afternoon in my entire life."

Fade to another black screen......

Scene 1: ACME Looniversity lunch room
Buster, Plucky, Hamton and the others are enjoying their lunch meals.

Plucky: "Hey, you guys, listen to this 1: why did the duck cross the road?"

They're all staring at Plucky blankly.

Plucky: "'Cause the chicken took a vacation!"

Babs: "Thanks for the joke around here, Plucky."

[Explosion!]

The air conditioners have broken down.

Professor Porky: "N-No preeuh preeuh trouble, cleeuh cleeuh, students, we'll have the air conditioners fixed in the nick of time."

Professor Bugs: "Now why don't all of you find some odda ways to cool yourselves down."

Outside the ACME Looniversity building
Buster, Babs, Plucky, Hamton, Shirley and Fifi walk around and explore the heatwave weather.

Buster: "Babs, guys, look who's over there at the monkey bars."

Cut to Fowlmouth by the monkey bars and Coach Sam standing by.

Fowlmouth puts both hands on the monkey bars, but they burn easily.

Fowlmouth: "Youch! my dadgum hands are on fire!"

Coach Sam: "Well just splash some ice cold water on it and get it over to the ACME Looniversity Nurse."

Plucky: "Even Professor Elmer's by the water fountain."

Cut to Professor Elmer over by the water fountain, which is still working.

Professor Elmer: "Good ding de watew fountain's stiww wowking."

Plucky, Hamton and the others take turns drinking ice cold water from the water fountain.

Cut back to Li'l Sneezer and Professor Daffy in the shady grounds....

Li'l Sneezer: "Professor Daffy, I got informa-"

Professor Daffy: "Try to speak up, Li'l Sneezer."

Li'l Sneezer: "I'm too parched to tattle-tale."

Fifi: "At least Une bonne chose came right outta zis heatwave."

Cut to Banjo Possum with a wind-up toy robot..........

Wind-Up Toy Robot: "Red alert: danger, red alert: danger, red alert: dangerrrrrr."

THe wind-up toy robot breaks down.

Banjo Possum: "Aw shoot!"

Cut back to Buster, Babs, Plucky, Hamton, Shirley and Fifi on the grass.......

Hamton: "Now look at that, you guys, how long before we end up like that toy robot? we're already overheated by now."

Montana Max shows up doing some sort of exercise moves.......

Montana Max: "So you all think you can stop and sweat at the exact same time? well who's hotter right now?"

Shirley: "Don't do it, Montana Max, don't do it!"

Montana Max: "You see? I can get a lot hotter than you any single time I want."

Montana Max begins sweating from his forehead.

Montana Max: [Groans A Bit] "I'm not feeling so well."

Professor Sylvester: "I sure wish this heatwave would end right now."

Professor Tweety: "So do I."

Suddenly, the water valves begin working and the air conditioners begin working as well.

Buster: "Well what do you know? the water valves and the air conditioners are finally working."

Babs: "Finally, no more heatwave."

Plucky: "Thank goodness."

Fade to another black screen......

Scene 1: The ACME Movie Theater
Plucky, Maria and Ralph are watching a movie on the big screen 'til the movie's over.

Plucky: "That movie stunk worse than an overcooked pizza taco."

Maria: "But, Plucky, you should be feeling lucky about it, not many young rabbits, ducks or pigs have many parents that can take them to the movie theater every single night."

Ralph: "That's exactly right, but some parents who are still alive, I must say."

Plucky, Ralph and Maria walk around in the back alley where they're confronted by Mr. Hitcher.

Maria: "Oh my gosh, this alley looks a lot dangerous, I'd better turn my wedding ring around."

Maria turns her wedding ring around over to flashlight mode.

Maria: "Oh my word."

Mr. Hitcher suddenly shows up.

Mr. Hitcher: "Alright, hand over the cash."

Ralph: "You don't terrify me!"

[Laser Gunshot]

Ralph: [Groans In Pain] "Or my beautiful wife!"

[More Laser Gunshots]

Maria: "Oh my word!"

Ralph: "Or.....my....."

Maria: "Ralph, please."

Ralph: (acting like he's dying right in front of Plucky) "Avenge my passing, Plucky, in some sort of super powered fashion."

Maria and Ralph are now deceased (not really).

ACME Cemetary
Plucky is now putting sunflowers on Maria and Ralph's graves.

Plucky: "Oh, Mom, Dad, I really wanna avenge your passing, but I don't know what to do about it."

Professor Daffy: "With lots of help from me?"

Plucky: "Professor Daffy? you can help me with my training?"

Professor Daffy: "Why sure, Plucky, it was way back when I was the 1st and original Batduck, come down to my fitness training house and we'll officially begin."

Plucky and Professor Daffy walk around on their way to Professor Daffy's fitness training house.

Inside Professor Daffy's fitness training house
Professor Daffy: "Okay, here we are, now you'll begin with push-ups, pull-ups, weight lifting and sit-ups."

Plucky: "Then count me in."

Plucky begins doing push-ups, then pull-ups, then weight lifting, then sit-ups, 'til he gets much stronger.

Professor Daffy: "Good, very good, you're getting much stronger than you were before."

Plucky: (doing his crime fighting karate moves) "Well what do you know? I'm getting super good at this."

Professor Daffy: "That's the spirit, now you're ready to be the new Batduck."

Plucky is now transformed into Batduck.

Batduck: "I'm finally Batduck, now I'm off to get my revenge on Mr. Hitcher."

Batduck leaps into action, then drives off in the Duck-Mobile on his way to find and catch Mr. Hitcher.

Inside the ACME Mansion
Mr. Hitcher: "When you're all deceased and gone for good, this universe will be mine for good."

Batduck barges right into the ACME Mansion.

Batduck: "Not so fast, Mr. Hitcher, you're the 1 who killed off my parents, now I'm gonna take you down!"

Mr. Hitcher: "No, please, I'm begging you, it's not what you think it is!"

Batduck avoids Mr. Hitcher's chainsaw attack moves, then karate kicks and punches him in the face 'til he's knocked out.

Batduck: "Well, he's finally defeated."

Mayor Bugs: "Nice work, Batduck, he's outta dis universe for good."

Reporter Lola: "But too bad, it's not gonna bring your parents back to life."

Batduck: "Oh well, suit yourselves."

Batduck transforms back into Plucky.

Plucky: "My crime fighting work and revenge is finally complete."

Fade to another black screen.....