Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers: The Brave Little Toaster Trilogy/Transcripts/The Brave Little Toaster

(Song: Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers Theme Song)

♪ Sometimes some crimes ♪

♪ Go slippin' through the cracks ♪

♪ But these two gumshoes ♪

♪ Are pickin' up the slack ♪

♪ There's no case too big, no case too small ♪

♪ When you need help, just call ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale's ♪

♪ Rescue Rangers ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale ♪

♪ When there's danger ♪

♪ No, no, it never fails ♪

♪ 'Cause once they're involved ♪

♪ Somehow whatever's wrong gets solved ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale ♪

♪ Rescue Rangers ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale ♪

♪ When there's danger ♪

♪ No, no, it never fails ♪

♪ They'll take the clues ♪

♪ And find the wheres and whys and whos ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale ♪

♪ Rescue Rangers ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale ♪

♪ When there's danger ♪

♪ Ch-Ch-Ch-Chip 'n Dale ♪

Chip: Keep your eyes peeled, men, Rob's things should be there.

Dale: Yeah, Rob is taking some old stuff to the dorm instead of new stuff.

Radio: [turns on] Good Morning, good morning, good morning! That was a-billion-and-one strings playing one of your all-time favorite tunes! At the top of the news this morning, there's monkey business in Utah. Oh, seriously, now. It seems that a band of renegade chimpanzees have kidnapped Pulitzer prize-winning poet Lester Charles and are demanding---

Lampy: What's the big idea? I'm attempting to sleep!

Radio: I doing a broadcasting. Do you mind? (Lampy turns on the light on Chip and Dale and Radio) Whoa, not in the face! Uh, the chimps are protesting...

Lampy: I've got a mind to reset your alarm... permanently!

Radio: Sorry, folks. We're experiencing technical difficulty... but it's nothing we can't handle! Whoa! This just in. Domestic violence erupts in peaceful cottage! We'll keep you post... (Lampy turns off Radio.)

Lampy: Whew! Can't hear your own thoughts with all the racket. (Radio pushes Lampy off the bed.) Holy mother of Edison! What were you thinking? You might have broken my bulb!

Radio: I'm thinking you think too much. We need wake-up music.

♪So when it's raining♪ #

♪Have no regrets♪ #

♪Because it isn't raining♪

♪rain you know ♪#

♪It's raining violets♪♪ ##

I'll track you to the end of this carpet. Come here. I'm going to get you. Wait till I fix your speaker! Rusetti picks it up and throws. Cepeda tags, he heads for second. Wait till I get my plugs on you! The crowd goes wild. Can you believe those Brooklyn Dodgers! I've got you. I've got you now. Ha, ha, ha.

Lampy: Hey, come over here. I'm gonna---

Radio: Why, do you dare to cross foils with the greatest Saxon swordsman in the land? Haven't you the slightest idea who you're dealing with?

Lampy: Precisely. A total... idiot!

Radio: If your saber wags as loosely as your Norman tongue, you'll be run through in an instant. Defend yourself, Sir Lampy of Locksley!

[Radio continually whacks Lampy with his antenna, Blanky falls on them]

Radio: A blow for Richard! A blow for Marian! A blow for Mario, the garbage man! And for Carl, and all the boys at the delicatessen! And here's one for the guys on 5th Street!

Lampy: Hey! No!

Kirby: [accidentally sucks up Blanky] Oh, whoa! Oh, no, what?!

Lampy: [stops the battle.] Hey, what's goin' on? What's goin' on? Who turned out the lights?

Toaster: [smiling] Good morning, everyone.

Blanky: [smiling] Good morning, Toaster.

Radio: [appearing from under Blanky] Hey, Slots.

Lampy: [appearing from under Blanky] Salutations.

Kirby: Umph! (the others help Kirby) Thanks.

Blanky: Who are you guys?

Dale: We're the Rescue Rangers!

Radio: What's on our lineup today?

Lampy: What are our instructions?

Kirby: What do you mean "what are we gonna do today"? The same thing we've done for the last 2,000 days: chores!

Blanky: Chores?

Toaster: It'll be fun.

Radio: Fun? I'm always up for fun! Listen, a broadcast from Ebbets Field! It's the top of the ninth...

Lampy: I don't understand how chores could be fun.

Kirby: Not supposed to be fun. It's work!

Blanky: I don't like to work without the Master.

Toaster: Well, okay. If you don't want to work, why don't we play a game? -

Radio: A game? What sort of game? -

Lampy: What are the rules?

Toaster: There's only one rule. You can't stop till the house is clean.

Others: Boo!

Radio: Gotcha, pal. Leave it to me. Hang on to your hats, you devil dogs... because the master bebop blaster... is gonna give you a soul injection.

[Tutti Fruiti plays]

Toaster: Hey, shhh. Quiet! It's the blanket!

(record needle scratches)

Dale: What's going on?

Blanky: A car. -

Toaster: A car? -

Others: A car!

All right, fellows, steady. A little to the left. Careful. - I'm gonna fall. - Keep climbing. You, get that light out of my eyes! All right, a little to the left. To the right! There you go. A little to the middle. I don't know which direction the middle is in. - Can you see? - Is it him? Any news? I'm dying down here. Is it the Master? It's him. He's back! It's the Master! Blanky! Master! Blanky! Was it him? I'm just curious. I hate being left in the dark. I guess we can assume that it wasn't him. Let's get back to work. Sorry for that interruption, folks. We return to our regularly scheduled program... at this time.

[Blanky bawls after realizing the Master hasn't returned]

Kirby: [annoyed upon hearing Blanky crying] Rrrhhh! Cry, cry, weep, wail and sob! It's disgusting! Every time! I can't believe it! Every single-- Give me that stupid picture! [tries to suck in Rob’s picture frame]

Blanky: No, no!

Toaster: I'll just put it away!

Kirby: In the garbage! [Radio and Lampy help him]

Blanky: No, you can't!

Kirby: Wimp!

Toaster: [annoyed] Let go!

Kirby: He's not coming back anyway.

Lampy: He might. The fact is, there's Just not enough facts.

Radio: Fight breaks out in the peaceful mountain cottage. The shocking world, and bringing Geneva Talks to a grinding halt!

Blanky: Stop it!

Chip: Somebody switch him off!

Kirby: Let me have it.

Blanky: You can't!

[the picture of Rob, their Master, flies through the air and crashes; Blanky gasps in shock]

Kirby: [shocked] Oh, no.

[The Rangers and the appliances go toward the broken photo stand of Rob; suddenly cold air breezes through the cottage, and Air Conditioner laughs ironically]

Toaster: What are you laughing at?

Air Conditioner: [stops laughing and smirks] Absolutely nothin', nothin' at all.

Lampy: I think he was laughin' at us.

Air Conditioner: You know somethin', you're a real bright little lamp.

Lampy: Oh, thanks. [offended] Hey!

Air Conditioner: You guys really have an attachment for that kid, don't ya?

Blanky: Yes. He was our master.

Air Conditioner: Well, that's real nice. And any day now, he might come rompin' back, huh? Just come whistlin' right back in through that door, and everything'll be the same; Real peachy-keen-like.

Blanky: Uh-huh.

Lampy: It's a possibility.

Toaster: Well, at least, we try to be optimistic.

Air Conditioner: "Optimistic"?! Somebody untie the knot in this guy's cord!

Kirby: [angrily] Why don't you just shut off?!

Air Conditioner: Hey, I'm real scared there, Kirby. What are you gonna do, suck me to death?

Kirby: Hmph!

Air Conditioner: What is it with you guys, anyway? You act like you just came off the assembly line. Now, get this through your chrome; [blows a gust of cold wind at the Rangers and the appliances] We've been dumped! Abandoned!

Blanky: But he loved us.

Radio: That's right.

Air Conditioner: So what? He's a kid; He has a family. They move away, he moves away. It's a package deal.

Toaster: But, maybe they're all--

Air Conditioner: [interrupts Toaster] He's not comin back, pure and simple.

Kirby: [to Air Conditioner] Oh, yeah? Did you talk to him recently or somethin'? They could drive up any second.

Blanky: [to Kirby] You really think so?

Kirby: [to Blanky] I'm not talkin' to you!

Air Conditioner: The whole bunch of ya gotta have a combined wattage of five, maybe less. It's been years. It's scrap-metal time.

Toaster: Well, you can do what you like. We're not gonna give up hope.

Air Conditioner: [sarcastically] That's real touchin', Toaster. You're gonna get me bawlin' like a baby any time now.

Toaster: I think you're jealous.

Air Conditioner: Sure, I'm jealous of a bunch of dimwits.

Lampy: [angrily] "Dim"?!

Toaster: Yeah. Because the Master never played with you.

Kirby: 'Cause you're stuck in the wall!

Air Conditioner: [blows cold air; angrily] So... it's back to that stupid static again. You think I don't know what's goin' on in here? I know what goes on in this cottage. It's a conspiracy, and every one of you low-watts is in on it. Just 'cause you can move around, you think you're better than I am. I'M NOT AN INVALID; I WAS DESIGNED TO STICK IN A WALL!! I LIKE BEIN' STUCK IN THIS STUPID WALL!! I can't help it if the kid was TOO SHORT TO REACH MY DIALS!!

Toaster: We didn't mean it! Really!

Air Conditioner: [roaring] IT'S MY FUNCTION!!! [He begins glowing in red-shift and then bright burst orange and sparks fly out of his mouth and on the Rangers and the appliances providing cover for themselves from the sparks]

Toaster: Don't! Wait! Wait!

[The Rangers and the appliances run away as Air Conditioner overheats]

Kirby: [alarmed] HE'S GONNA BLOW!

Toaster: YANK YOUR CORDS!

[Blanky, Radio and Lampy pull out their plugs from two outlets and take cover]

Kirby: [behind chair] THE FUSE!

Toaster: KIRBY!

[Air Conditioner continues to rage until he finally explodes. Toaster and Lampy carefully peek from behind the stairs and the appliances see the Air Conditioner's blown up remains.]

Blanky: Poor Air Conditioner.

Toaster: I didn't know he'd take it so hard.

Kirby: Well, he was a jerk anyway.

Lampy: Hey, hey. What's that? What is it?

[revving is heard]

Blanky: [happily] A car!

Kirby: [angrily] I don't want to hear another word about cars!

Toaster: [agreeing with Kirby] You said it.

Radio: Sound pretty close.

Kirby: Just don't even start!

Lampy: Sounds real close.

[pauses for a few seconds, and when they the Master is gonna pick them up, and then go hides. But then, they hear a hammer, and look out the window to see a “For Sale” sign; Blanky looks shocked. Radio hums with Taps, Blanky bawls and falls to the floor, Lampy moaning sadly]

Chip and Toaster: [angrily] STOP IT!

[scenes cut to jumps on the box and stand on top]

Toaster: We’re going out to find him!

Radio, Lampy, Kirby, and Blanky: WHAT?!

Kirby: What are you talking about? What do you mean?

Toaster: Exactly what it I said. We’re gonna go out and find the master.

Blanky: [scared] To the city?

Toaster: Yeah, no matter what.

Lampy: Well, how exactly would you propose we’re gonna do that, exactly?

Toaster: I-- I don’t know!

Kirby: Oh, come off it. Be serious!

Toaster: I am serious!

Kirby: You’re insane. [backs away]

Radio: Why, if only we were all wiener dogs, our problems would be solved.

[pauses they look at each other]

Toaster: [confused] What?

Radio: Or maybe it was basset hound.

Kirby: You’re all insane!

Radio: It was a news flash I picked up yesterday about a dog. [country accent] In an amazing show of loyalty and courage, a terrier name Grover traveled hundred of miles... to be reunited with his owner. The poor little critter was accidentally left behind on a fishing trip three weeks ago. He had to find his way across the rugged mountain and scorching desserts in order to get home. Little Grover turned out to be one spunky pup.

Toaster: If the dog can do it, we can do it!

Blanky: But a dog has legs.

Toaster Ah, don’t be a wet blanket.

Lampy: Actually, legs would help, you know.

Kirby: Brains wouldn’t hurt, either.

Lampy: Lay off.

Radio: Yeah, pipe down, carpet breath!

Toaster: Well, I’m going with or without you.

Kirby: I say we stay. We’ll have a new master anyway as soon as someone buys the cottage.

Blanky: But I don’t want a new master. I want our master.

Gadget: You're have your master instead of new one.

Toaster: Well, what about the rest of you?

Radio: You boys are gonna need a leader. Why, alone, you wouldn’t last for five minutes out there. I used to be a mountaineer, see? And together, we can stand against the forces of nature.

Lampy: Were you really a mountaineer?

Radio: Sure. Ask anybody. Ask Teddy Roosevelt. Why, we shot moose together on the Klondike.

Lampy: Wow. Well, you know, I was just thinking, you guys will need somebody bright along, too.

Toaster: Good idea.

Radio: Listen to this. World War II, the Normandy Invasion. And who's there but Lampy to light the way?

[the appliances look at Kirby]

Toaster: Y'know, I thought it’d be good to have somebody come along, who’s really... strong.

Dale: And bossy.

Lampy: And loud.

Blanky: And grumpy!

Radio: And oblivious to reality.

[Toaster hits appliances in annoyance while Chip bonks Dale on the head]

Toaster: Well?

[pause; a few seconds later, Kirby begrudgingly joins in]

Kirby: [under his breath] I just know I’m gonna regret this.

[the rest of the appliances cheer.]

Lampy: [opens fuse box, and pulls out last fuse] Wow. This was our last fuse.

Toaster: See? [puts last fuse in transmitter] It's a good thing we're getting out of here.

Radio: [turns on kitchen light] I've always loved travel, anyway. The open road, the smell of the wind in my face, the files clogging up my grille.

Kirby: Yeah? Well, how are we going to travel?

Lampy: Hey, I got an idea. We can all get on top of the bed, you know, and then Kirby can push us.

[Kirby pushes the bed with Toaster, Blanky, Radio, and Lampy on board.]

Gadget: Easy, easy.

[Kirby tries to push gently down the stairs, but pushes too hard, and sends Toaster, Blanky, Radio, and Lampy falling down with the bed]

Lampy: No, no, no. Hey! What’s about Master’s Pogo stick?

[the appliances jump on the Pogo stick.]

Chip: Ok. Left. Right. Your other right! [the appliances try to go forward, and succeed for a bit, but end up going backward in the wrong direction on it, and crash]

Lampy: No, that’s no good. Hey, how about we're in the refrigerator on a skateboard, and Kirby can pull?

[Kirby, with a rope attached to him, pulls the skateboard with the refrigerator on top.]

Monty: Helmsman, steady as she goes.

[Kirby tries to pull gently, but ends up pulling too hard that the rope snaps from the skateboard, which sends Kirby flying forward, and causes the refrigerator to fall off, tilt over, and land on the floor with a loud thunk, as Blanky, now blue, and with his teeth chattering, shivers in the freezer, due to the ice freezing him]

Lampy: No, no, no. Hey!

Dale: Yeah!

Radio: [annoyed] Shut up! Shut up!

Toaster, Kirby, Blanky, Chip, Gadget, Monty: [annoyed] Shut up!

Radio: Let somebody else try for a change. Arise, Hassan, arise, O magic carpet.

Toaster: We need a longer cord.

Radio: We need an alternate power source, I say.

- I guess this is it. - Uh-huh. Blanket? Huh? Ready to go? Yeah, I'm ready. Okay, Kirby. Hmm, shag carpet. Look, Lampy. From here you can see the really big lamp. Wow! I wonder where his switch is? We are pioneers. Whoa! Can't see the road anymore. Are we going in the right direction? I don't think so. You boys need a navigator. Navigator? I'll tune in a radio signal from the city. I can take you right there, lickety-split.

Radio: North, by Northwest. Watch out for low-flying aircraft.

[Lampy lands on Blanky]

Blanky: OUCH!!!

Toaster: What's wrong?

Blanky: He stepped on me!

Lampy: Did not.

Blanky: Did too!

Lampy: Did not!

Blanky and Kirby: Did TOO!!

Lampy: Did NOT!!

Toaster: Hey, hey, hey. Come on. How do guys expect us to get there if you're fighting all the time?

Blanky: You mean we're not there yet?

Toaster: [calmly and smiling] No, no, not yet. [rubs Blanky's head] We got a long way to go.

Kirby: Oh, boy. You're tellin' me.

want to go # filled with ease # and the trees # in the city of light # in the country # for a fuss and a fight # be satisfied # not denied # in the city at night # diamond shines # everything's all right # to make him wait # he will open up the gate # with a plan I can understand # of great reflection # his hand across the land # of our affection # in the city of light # in the country # a fuss and a fight # be satisfied # not denied # with some pride # to the city #
 * 1) Life is like a journey #
 * 2) On the road that's within #
 * 3) Head says you should stay #
 * 4) But your heart says to begin #
 * 5) So you go #
 * 6) But you don't
 * 1) Any life worth living #
 * 2) Isn't life just
 * 1) You just stay forgiving #
 * 2) Through the forests
 * 1) And you'll go #
 * 2) Just where you want to go #
 * 3) Time flies by
 * 1) Time stands still
 * 1) There's no time
 * 1) As we travel the land #
 * 2) And I'd
 * 1) Just to be
 * 1) To reside with some pride #
 * 2) While I ride to the city #
 * 3) The city of light #
 * 4) Light shines like a diamond
 * 1) When that
 * 1) You know that
 * 1) But you know #
 * 2) We got a way to go #
 * 3) Let us meet the Master #
 * 4) We don't want
 * 1) You just keep a-knocking
 * 1) To that city of light #
 * 2) Master is a man
 * 1) Master is a man
 * 1) Master is a man who lays
 * 1) Master is a man
 * 1) Time flies by
 * 1) Time stands still
 * 1) There's no time for
 * 1) As we travel the land #
 * 2) And I'd
 * 1) Just to be
 * 1) To reside
 * 1) While I ride
 * 1) The city of light ##

[The appliances stop at a clearing in a bramble patch.]

Lampy: Hey, everybody! Look! A clearing!

Kirby: Great. Let's spread out the blanket and have a picnic.

Blanky: But I'm full of stickers.

Kirby: Well, my bags are full of thistles and sticks and who knows what else! Whose idea was it to come this way anyway?

Radio: Why it was the Lamp's, I tell you!

Lampy: Oh, yeah? Who's supposed to be the big-shot navigator around here, Mr. Loudmouth? Mr. Big... Loudmouth?

Kirby: Yeah.

Toaster: Where are we, anyway?

Radio: Now, look here, fellas, just give me a second, and, uh... [notices a small pebble] Oh, listen to this! It's the top of the 9th, the bases are all loaded, and Pee-Wee Reese is at the plate. Here's the pitch... [kicks the pebble in the air] ...and he connects! [hits the pebble with his antenna, which bounces off Toaster, Kirby, and Lampy] OH!!! And it's a triple play! [Kirby and Lampy angrily swarm around Radio]

Toaster: Knock it off, you guys! We should all settle down and try to get some sleep.

[Lampy drops the rock. Next scene shifts to Lampy laying his head on a rock. He hears a sound and sees Radio drawing a dirt circle in the dirt]

Radio: [about the circle in the dirt] This is my sleeping space, see? And nobody crosses this line!

Lampy: Yeah, well you'd better not wake us up at 6:00 as usual!

Kirby: What are you complaining about? You didn't do any work today.

Radio: Yeah!

[Blanky crawls to Lampy, who looks at him angrily.]

Lampy: Go find your own place to sleep, ya little fuzz ball. [goes to sleep; Blanky tries going into Radio's sleeping space, but Radio stops him.]

Radio: Watch it! Hey! Hey! Hey! What, are you blind? It's a line. Aht-aht!

Kirby: [annoyed] Good night! [falls asleep]

[Blanky tries cuddling up to Toaster, who then wakes up.]

Toaster: [tired, shoos Blanky away] Come on. I'm not the Master. Go snuggle somewhere else. I'm trying to get some sleep. Now go on.

Blanky:Help! Don't leave me. Listen, listen. What's that?

Toaster:Over there!

Blanky:Oh, look!

Lampy:Light. I see light!.

Radio: That's the same riff I used... when I was drumming for Cab Calloway. Like this.

Kirby:Cut that out!


 * La, la-la-la-la-la, la #
 * La, la-la-la-la-la, la #

Booga-booga. Boodle-boodle. Get out of here! Hey fellas, come look at this. Whoa! I'm trying to see. Look at me!

Toaster:Oh. No, no. It's just a reflection. I'm not a flower.

Blanky:Come on, help me. Help They're killing me.

Toaster:Hey, you leave him alone!

Blanky:Stop it. Give me that. He was chewing on the Master.

Toaster:Time to go.

Bye.

Toaster:Are you sure this is the right direction?

Radio: Why certainly, am as sure as I am honest.

Lampy:In that case, then we're definitely lost.

Blanky:But theremight be lions in there.

Radio:And tigers and bears, oh my.

Lampy:He's such a baby. Waa-waa!

Toaster:What's the matter, Kirby?

Kirby: Battery's running low. We should give it a rest. Turn out that light.

Blanky:Do we have to stop here?

Toaster:Only for a while.

Radio:Just long enough to lose our minds. We'll be cannibals within a few days. I've seen it happen.

Kirby:You'll be the first to go, dial face.

Lampy: Hey, fellas, we can stay here. Look. What's the matter?

Radio:Eaten alive, the poor sap.

Lampy:[screams]

Radio: Oh, I thought you were a goner.

Lampy: Eh, you wish.

Toaster :You know guys, we are gonna need some kind of shelter.

Kirby: Yeah. Shelter from the likes of them.

Radio:Come here and say that, chrome-dome. -

Kirby:What? -

Radio:Oh, sorry. I meant to say "vacuous vacuum. " Alrigh, ladies and gentlemen, let's get ready to rumble. In the blue corner, undefeated champion... Rocko "The Radio" Ratuno. Ding! And there's the bell. They're on each other like black on a bowling ball.

Lampy: Hey look.

Radio:That concludes our broadcast day. This is Lowell Winchell signing off. Good night, America, and all the ships at sea.

Toaster:Thanks.

Blanky:Oh that's all right.

Lampy:So, what's this thing with you and the blanket?

Toaster: What thing?

Lampy: You know. All of a sudden you're being so darn nice to him all of a sudden.

Toaster:Oh that. Well, I was just thinking, and I got this feeling... that I should be nicer to him for a change. And now I feel better. -

Lampy: Wow. That's weird. -

Toaster: What's weird about it?

Lampy:I dunno. I mean, you were never this nice to him before... and now you're nice to him all the time. I don't know. I'm just trying to understand, figure out what it means.

Toaster: Well it's kinda hard to describe. It's like being next to a new loaf of bread. Hmm, let's see. It's like a warm, toasty feeling inside. Like a glow that just-. -

Lampy:A glow? -

Toaster:Yeah.

Lampy:I think I know what you're talking about. It's like the feeling I get when I think about the Master.

Toaster: Yeah, That's it.

Lampy: I remember the first time my bulb burned out. I thought, "That's it. "It's over. I'm burned out. Eighty-sixed. To the showers! " But then the Master put in a brand-new bulb. And I just glowed.

Toaster: Well, that's all there is to it.

Lampy:That's very interesting. Good night, slot head.

Toaster: Good night.

Blanky:Help me! Help me! Toaster!

Toaster:Blanky! - Blanky?

Lampy:- Blanky!

Toaster:Where are you? Blanky! -Can you hear me?

Kirby:The battery's gone dead!

Radio:We're trapped like rats... small rats with no hair and one light.

Toaster:Blanky! -

Others:Blanky!

Kirby:Where are you, you little wimp?

Toaster:Blanky!

Toaster: Lampy!

Toaster:Blanky? Where are you? Blaaaaaaaankeey?

Lampy:Come on, Blanky, speak up for pete's sake! [coughing]

Toaster:No no. Just relax. You've done enough. We'll look for him.

Lampy:I am feeling a little burned out.

Radio:Listen to this. A lamp was awarded a Purple Heart. tofay.. for being wounded in the line of duty. Lamps across the nation were switched off... for a moment of silence in respect for his act of bravery.

Blankey:Help. -

Toaster: Hey. Listen. -

Blanky: Help me please. Toaster, Kirby, I'm stuck. -

Toaster: I hear him.

Lampy:- But I can't see him.

Radio: Maybe he's calling from blanket heaven. He's a puffy yellow angel, with a knob nose.

Kirby:He's just stuck in a tree that's all. Look!

Blanky:Help.

Toaster:Hang on tight Blanky:.

Blanky: I am.

Radio:Don't let the tremendous height scare you.

Kriby:Hey, watch out. Come on. I can't see. Get off.

Blanky:Watch out below!

[both yelling]

Blanky:That was kind of fun.

Kirby:Now get off of my face!

Toaster:- Thanks, Kirby.

-Lampy: Great idea Kirby:.

Blankey:You saved me.

Radio:I knight thee "Sir Vac. "

Kirby:Now just cut it out all of you. I only did it so we could be on our way. We're wasting time.

Kirby:What's this? What's... Oh, no. Oh, no.

Toaster:Kirby, no!

Lampy:Get the cord out of his mouth! Don't let him swallow it.

Radio: Switch him off.

Lampy:He just shorted right out.

Radio:Cracked up, snapped, sold the farm. Poor chump.

Lampy:How's he look?

Radio: Better than you, actually. Keep it up, slots. Carpet-sweeping motions. He should come around sooner or later.

Toaster:Hey, I think it's working. Kirby, can you hear me?

Blanky:Wake up. Wake up! Kirby!

Toaster: You're all right.

All:Yeah!

Kirby:Lay off! Just lay off! -

Blanky: What's the matter? -

Lampy: We were worried about you.

Radio:You gave us a real scare, pal.

Kirby:Well, here's nothing wrong with me, pal! - Just back off!

Blanky: Don't be angry.

Kirby:Just keep your antennas, knobs, and wires... and rivets off my chrome! Who needs you guys anyway? Got to drag you around all the time bunch of dead weight. I'd be better off without you.

Blanky:But Kirby...

Kirby:Especially you, you little rag. So how do we get across this thing, anyway?

Radio:I think Houdini did this once. If I remember right, he was out of the hospital in no time.

Lampy:That's encouraging.

Toaster:Okay, Kirby.

Lampy: Hey, we're not dead.

Radio:Yeah? Where's some wood to knock on? Toaster, you okay? Toaster?

Toaster:Yeah, I am. Give me some slack.Wha... Agh.

All: Aaahhhh! Yeowwww!

Blankey: Help! Help!

Radio:Damn thee, thou cursed whale! From the depths of hell I stab at thee. -

Kirby: Climb on, you idiot. -

Radio: Oh, it's you.

Kirby:Where's Toaster?

Lampy: He sank.

Radio: Boy, are we glad to see you!

Lampy:I really thought I'd turned in my warranty.

Radio:Yeah, until baggy showed up.

Kirby:I just slipped and fell in, that's all. -

All:Ha, ha, ha. -

Lampy:Sure! Right.

Blanky:You can't fool us. We love you. Like Mrs. Roosevelt loved her husband. Here's the shore. Everybody off.

Radio:Listen to this! This is President Roosevelt... awarding the vacuum the Medal of Honor.

Ha, ha! That's funny. I'm dying.

Toaster:Where are we?

I can't believe this. I'm really sorry. Oh, come on. It's not your fault. Things could be worse, you know. - How? - How what? How could they be worse? They couldn't. I lied. Can't you find anything? I'm lucky my backup batteries work at all. I hope we're not going in circles. Come on. Aaah! I knew I shouldn't have let you guys drive. Come on, pull! Kirby! This is great fun. Let's make these outings a regular thing, okay? Inflate your bag!

Kirby:Help me!

Blanky: Aaah!

Lampy:Wow, the poor guy didn't have a chance. He just ssss, and that's it.

Radio:Don't look now, but you're about to ssss yourself!

Lampy:What? Whoa! *blub*

Toaster:Blanky, let go. Try to untie yourself.

Blanky:I'm not scared.

Toaster:Blank-

Radio:[worried[ Well, that concludes our broadcast today. Actually, it concludes... all future broadcasting of any sort. We'll sign off now with a suitable tune!

Peters:Ha, I thought I heard a radio! Whoa! Hmm. Upsy-daisy! Whoop! There you go! Good boy, Quadruped. You remembered your seat belt. A customer!

Radio:Seems like a nice fella. Dingy, but nice.

Hanging Lamp:Heh-heh-heh! Heh-heh-heh! Yes, Mister St. Peters is quite an amusing fellow... isn't he? Oh, you poor baby. Your bulb is burned out. Here, you can have one of mine. Use it in good health... while you still can.

Man:Hello, compadre... I am in deep need of a blender motor.

Peters:Ha, ha! A blender motor? Why sure. I got a whole shipment ofblender motors in last week.

Man:Oh boy. Heaven sent you to me.

Peters:I'll have it for you in Now what did I do with that blender? I could've sworn I left it here a second ago. I'm getting as loopy as a polecat... without any whiskers. There you are! I found you. Gotta move you guys out of the way.

Peters:Boy, are you some lucky guy! This was the last one left.

Hanign Lamp:Heh-heh! Heh-heh-heh! You never quite know what he's going to do. He's so spontaneous.

Lampy:W- w-well, how do we escape?

Hanging Lamp:Did you hear that guys? They want to know how to escape!

[All laughing]

Don't fall off of the shelf # the new boys in town # Is someone moving 'round # You don't look so well # I feel great # yourself to fate # just hang around # We've got to operate # It's a house of wax # Frankenstein # my spine # out of here # my dear # to the cellar down below # in the brew # down there # will give you good advice # what to do # tell him boo # in the stew, I'm telling you # Look at me. Barf, barf, barf! I'm a can opener, a lamp, and a shaver. Oh, God, I'm a mishmash! than I feared # and make it disappear # - #This is strange # - # It ain't home on the range # that you got cold feet # Here comes the night # turn on the light # that fate has been kind # You are out of your mind # ah-ahh #
 * 1) Watch yourself
 * 1) You must be
 * 1) What's that sound
 * 1) Sit down for a spell
 * 1) Wait a minute
 * 1) You just leave
 * 1) You might as well
 * 1) It's too late
 * 1) Just try to relax
 * Oh, I remember
 * 1) Shivers up
 * 1) Whoa-oh #
 * 2) I'm for getting
 * 1) No need to shout
 * 1) No-oh #
 * 2) Who will go
 * 1) Trouble is a-bubbling
 * 1) While you're
 * 1) Mr. Vincent Price
 * 1) He'll know
 * 1) You just
 * 1) He will put the voodoo
 * 1) It's like a movie #
 * 2) It's a B-movie show #
 * 3) It's like a movie #
 * 4) It's a B-movie show #
 * 1) This is weird #
 * 2) It's much worse
 * 1) I'll close my eyes
 * 1) You just tell St. Pete
 * 1) There goes the sun
 * 1) Somebody
 * 1) Somebody tell me
 * 1) You can't go out
 * 1) It's like a movie #
 * 2) It's a B-movie show #
 * 3) It's like a movie #
 * 4) It's a B-movie show #
 * 5) Ah-ahh #
 * 6) Ah-ahh
 * 1) Ahhh ##

Excuse me, the missus loved the blender motor. Was wondering if you got some radio tubes, too. Sure. I got a whole shipment of radio tubes in this morning. You gotta help me. I'll do anything! I can get you bread, mounds of hot cross buns. Pull yourself together!

Radio:Now what did I do with that radio? I could swear I left it right here... in this very, very spot. What did it do, get up and walk away? I really should drink more coffee. Aha! There you are! Ha, ha! I got ya!


 * 1) Bo-bub-bup #

Toaster: Kirby, what should we do?

Kirby:I don't know.

Lampy:Hey! I've got an idea!

Lampy: See? It worked! I told you! I told you! I knew! It worked!

Megaphone:Jailbreak! Jailbreak!

Peters:What?

Man:Did I catch you at a bad time? Just wondering if you got my radio tubes.

Rob's mom: Honey... are you taking enough underwear?

Rob:Mom, you bought me enough underwear to stock the whole dorm.

Rob's mom:Do you have enough socks?

I'm not going to Jupiter, I'm going to college.

-=It's just college. - So let me worry a little bit. I'm your mother.

That's probably Chris. We're going to the cabin... and pick up the lamp and radio and stuff. I can use them at the dorm.

Hi, Rob. You ready?

Yeah Good-bye, Mom!

Take a sweater.

Hey, Plugsy. - Yeah? - Did you hear that? He's taking some old... stuff to the dorm... instead of us. All right, go! You're gonna like this cabin. Too bad we have to sell it.

Blanky:How are we gonna find the Master...in this big place? Here it is. Excuse me... could you tell us how to get to... To, uh...

A113. This is it. Go ahead.

Blanky:He's not home.

Toaster: We'll have to wait.

Radio/:So let's wait inside and relax!

Lampy: But it's locked.

Radio:Luckily, my war training included inter-appliance codes. I will simply render the secret appliance knock... and we'll be welcomed by the native machinery. Stand aside, my meager companion. Hiya, pal!

It's them! What are we gonna do? Should we let them in? Shhh! All right.

Purple Lamp: How do ya do? Tarry not upon our doorstep. Please feel free to enter, all of ya.

Chris:Boy, you were some lucky kid.

Rob:Every summer for as long as I can remember... we'd be running all over this place.

Radio:I looked her straight into those big blue eyes. It was you who killed Johnson. Parker found out and you killed him. Then you tried to get me. It's your turn, sweetheart. Now you're taking the fall. There was a shot! A puff of smoke! We ran like the dickens! - And that's how we got here. -

Lampy: Wow!

Toaster:Well, something like that.

And all on your own, too. How convenient. I mean... - Remarkable. - Yeah.

Sewing machine:Junkyard refugees... - in this house. - What's the world coming to? I wouldn't sew a stitch on that raggedy blanket. If you could call it a blanket. - Looks like an old diaper. - It smells. - It's raggedy. - Get that thing away from me. - Did someone wash that thing? - No. Yuck. I'm nauseous. Oh, how do you do?

Blanky:How do you do? Hey, look at this!

Lampy:Boy! He sure has grown.

Radio:Look at at him. What a heartbreaker!

Toaster: He graduated, too!

Kirby:Of course! He knows how to work hard.

Blanky:He's all big now. - I hope he still needs us. -

T.V:Still needs you? That's the silliest thing I ever heard!

Radio:Why If it isn't old rabbit ears!

T.V Why If it isn't old loudmouth! -

Blanky:Hi, TV!

Lampy::How ya doing?

T.V: Oh, I've got a few more seasons left.

Toaster:The cottage wasn't the same after they took you away.

Kirby:Yeah, it wasn't as noisy.

T.V: I see you haven't changed.

Radio:Kind of gives you a sense of security, doesnt it?

Blanky:Where's the Master?

T.V:No one told you? Is he gonna be surprised when he gets back! He just left to drive out to the... -

Lampy: Hey! -

Radio: What's the idea?

Purple Lamp:Oh, many pardons. Was you watching that channel?

Rob:Come on in. It's the greatest, isn't it?

Chris:You guys sure did some weird stuff with your furniture.

Rob: What happened? This is... Gee! Somebody trashed the whole cottage!

Chris:You big dumbo. Didn't you lock the doors?

Radio:I don't believe I've ever seen... quite so many smiles before.

Kirby: I've never seen contraptions with so many... buttons and knobs and dials before.

Computer: Naturally. We are on the cutting edge of technology.

- Wow. - What does that mean? I don't know. What does that mean?

uninvited # you'd be delighted # or place to hedge # would be so bold to # and no one's told you # to the cutting edge # accounting too # displays for you # locked into your memory # cast in plastic # and sounds fantastic # to your dear old uncle Emery # and more # what it's for # with the score # on the edge # Rio deJaneiro, my dear # any Club Paradise # where the picture is clear # you don't even have to go # and more # or place you wish # with some dish # on the edge # to whip up some mean cuisine # totally automatic # biscuits too # out for you # and that's no static # and more # and chips to call # yourself a ball # on the edge # tweeters, antenna trees # life of ease # on the edge ## - And more! - And more!
 * 1) Since you came here
 * 1) We all knew
 * 1) This is not the time
 * 1) No one here
 * 1) But since you asked
 * 1) Let us take you
 * 1) I can process words
 * 1) And my pixel screen
 * 1) Computer graphics
 * 1) With fiber optics
 * 1) For natural sights
 * 1) Just reach out and talk
 * 1) More, more, more #
 * 2) Everything you wanted
 * 1) More, more, more #
 * 2) Let me tell you
 * 1) Here's the printout
 * 1) Get yourself together
 * 1) Ooo-ahh-ooo #
 * 2) You want to go to old
 * 1) You want tojoin in
 * 1) You'd rather stay at home
 * 1) You get it on the stereo and
 * 1) More, more, more #
 * 2) Everything you wanted
 * 1) More, more, more #
 * 2) Any time
 * 1) You might meet up
 * 1) Pull yourself together
 * 1) If you want a lean machine
 * 1) I'm on the scene
 * 1) I can bake your
 * 1) Pop some dough boy
 * 1) I'm micro solid-state
 * 1) More, more, more #
 * 2) Everything you wanted
 * 1) More, more, more #
 * 2) We're the bytes
 * 1) You just have
 * 1) It's all hyperactive
 * 1) From LEDs to CRTs, woofers
 * 1) An ultra-nylon
 * 1) Everything you dreamed of

Rob:Where's the toaster? Where's the vacuum? What's going on? Where's the radio, the lamp and blanket?

Blanky:I'm glad the Master has such good appliances.

Radio:Yeah, couldn't get any more modern.

Lampy:They're wonderful.

Rob's mom:Now honey, tI mean it. Take some of our things. This lamp would look so cute in your dorm room.

Chris:Go for it.

Rob:What are you going to read by?

Rob's Mom:I'll buy some candles. I won't read. I'll go out.

Rob:Thanks mom, but I'm not gonna take your stuff. I'll just pick up a few cheap things this afternoon.

T.V:That's right, ladies and gentlemen. Appliances, cheap appliances... available now at Ernie's Disposal.

Rob:Where's a good bargain place around here?

Chris:You should have gone for the new stuff.

Radio:Oh, were you in line first? After you, of course! Pardon me! kind of pressure # a road too long # I just can't # to get started # to live in the fast lane # and gone # And there ain't nothing you can do about it! Pardon me while I panic! Worthless # Rob:No, that place is too expensive.
 * 1) I can't take this
 * 1) I must confess #
 * 2) One more dusty road #
 * 3) Would just be
 * 1) Worthless #
 * 2) I just can't
 * 1) I just can't seem
 * 1) I don't have the heart
 * 1) All that is past
 * 1) Worthless #
 * 1) Worthless
 * 1) Worthless #

T.V:Cheap! We're talking real cheap!

Chris:Hey! What about Rooney's down on 53rd? They've got used vacuums and junk.

T.V:This just in. Rooney's vacuums found to be... carcinogenic in recent lab tests! Big, big tumors on those rats. We've got photos to prove it... and I don't even want to look at them. K.C., Missouri # on Route 66 # from Butte to M.O. # and east of Savannah # to old Kokomo # the Indy 500 # I'm impressed how I did # that I came # a second sensation # of the line # out of mind #
 * 1) I come from
 * 1) And I got my kicks
 * 1) Every truck stop
 * 1) Motown to old Alabama #
 * 2) From Texarkana
 * 1) From Tampa
 * 1) Worthless #
 * 2) I once ran
 * 1) I must confess
 * 1) And I wonder how close
 * 1) Now I get
 * 1) I was the top
 * 1) Out of sight

T.V: So much for fortune and fame A bargain in every buck! A buck in every pocket! A pocket in, uh, every trouser! Ernie's Bargain Circus... where you ride the Ferris wheel of values... toward a better tomorrow. to a wedding # his loneliness # turn to home and return # to a graveyard # It's quite hard enough # I have learned # Chris:Let's go cruising and see what we can find.
 * 1) Once took a Texan
 * 1) He kept forgetting
 * 1) Letting his thoughts
 * 1) I took a man
 * 1) I beg your pardon
 * 1) Just living with the stuff
 * 1) Worthless #

T.V:Why wander endlessly through the sprawling wasteland... they call the city... when your dreams are all under one roof? Our roof, corner of 3rd and E. Crazy Ernie's Amazing Emporium... of total bargain madness! Ha-ha-ha! Ha!

Rob:Have you ever heard of this place before? Looks pretty neat. a surfer to sunset # and buns filled with weenies # couldn't forget # up to Zuma # up to Zuma # the rumor was # in the lay of the land # hit the highway # a reservation # they would love me # back to old Santa Fe # Indian nation # on the skids # to lie in the shade # Rob:This sure doesn't look like... Crazy Ernie's Amazing Emporium of total bargain madness. -
 * 1) Once drove
 * 1) There were bikinis
 * 1) Fellini just
 * 1) Pico, let's go
 * 1) Pico, let's go
 * 1) From Zuma to Yuma
 * 1) I had a hand
 * 1) Get up and go
 * 1) Ooo-ooo #
 * 2) I worked on
 * 1) Ooo-ooo #
 * 2) Who would believe
 * 1) And leave on a bus
 * 1) Once in an
 * 1) I took the kids
 * 1) With a Hopi was happy
 * 1) You're worthless ##

Chris:It's the right address. -

Radio:At least we'll all go together. That's looking at the bright side, isn't it?

Blanky: No! No! The Master's down there! Look! -

Lampy: It's him! -

Kirby:What? Where?

Why look, it is him! Maybe he still needs us! Yeah!

Rob:Chris?

Chris:Hey, these are hard to find.

Rob:This is me.

Chris:What? I can't hear you.

Rob:I don't get it.

There he is. I can't believe it. Freeze. Here he comes. You jump off one side, I'll jump off the other. Okay, I got it. Which side? - Right side. - Okay.

LAmpy: Whew: I'm glad we don't have to do this every day.

Blanky:Look!

Chris:Hey Rob, come here.

Rob: What?

Kirby:Doggone it! -

Blanky: He's coming back.

Toaster: He'll see us this time.

Kirby: Run!

Rob:This looks just like my old blanket. I think it is my blanket. Whoa, that's my radio. Hey, Chris! Oh alright and the lamp! Hey, Chris! Hey! Wait a minute! These are mine. Let go! Whoa! Let me down! Aaah! Chris! Help!

Chris:Where are you? Rob?

Rob:Chris!

Chip: (sees the crusher's gears) The gears! If we jam these, this should be stopping the crusher!

Chris:Would you cool it? Now get down here. You're scaring me to death.

Monty: I stopped the crusher.

Dale: There's someone before you.

Chip: Toaster...

Fat Cat: (laughs evilly) Hello, my little Rescue Rangers! I've waited a long time for this!

Dale: Fat Cat?

Fat Cat: The one and only!

Chip: Fat Cat! You used the Cutting Edge appliances to get rid of Toaster and his friends!

Fat Cat: That's right! They're ensure Rob taking them to the dorm. Until you're stopped my plan.

Chip: Come on and face us? Are you a cat or a mouse?

Fat Cat: Let's get plucked, Rangers!

Chris:Really now. Why don't you just buy a new one?

Rob:Are you kidding? Where could I find another toaster like this?

Chris:Like that? Probably nowhere.

Rob:Bye, Mom. I love you.

Rob's mom:I'll call you tonight. You forgot your sweater!

Blanky:We did good, didn't we?

Toaster:Yep, we did good.

Lampy:You know, I've been thinking. This college business seems like a good idea. I can absorb a lot of interesting facts.

Radio:Listen to this. I'm picking up a news flash! President Roosevelt has declared today a national holiday... in honor of those five amazing appliances we've heard about. So lock up the office, take down the top... and open that rumble seat! Last one to Coney Island is a party pooper. From the starlight roof high atop the Ritz... we wish our intrepid little friends... the best of luck... and a fond farewell!

Kirby: Ah, you're all a bunch of junk.