The Secret Musical Life of Pets/Transcript

Introduction
[opening logos]

Director #1: Quiet on the set! And we're rolling!

Director #2: Adam Sandler and Robert Smigel introduction, take one.

Director #1: All right, so Adam's here. He always plays the same guy in every movie. Can you sit in that chair quickly?

Adam Sandler: Hold the microphone up there. Take the lights, are we all set?

Director #1: All right, places, everyone! Adam, are you ready?

Adam Sandler: Yep, let's light this motherfucker up!

Director #1: All right, here we go, quiet, please, hold the noise, hold the work, here we go and... 3, 2, 1!

Adam Sandler: Hey, I'm Adam.

Robert Smigel: And I'm Robert. We're the co-writers of The Secret Musical Life of Pets.

Adam Sandler: The movie you're about to see right now is in three dimensions.

Robert Smigel: Hopefully.

Adam Sandler: We get letters from fans all over the world asking us questions about the movie that we...

Robert Smigel: No, that's not actually true. We don't get a lot of actual, physical "written on paper" letters...

Adam Sandler: No, no. That's true... That's true.

Robert Smigel: ...what we get is a lot of e-mails. Digital, electronic...

Adam Sandler: Yeah. Actually, all of the e-mails we've ever received fit on this flash drive right here. But that's not as impressive as this...