Chihuahua Superstar/Transcript

Oliver and Company: The Series

Chihuahua Superstar

(Setting: The Foxworth house. Georgette and Tito are taking part in a photo shoot, with Georgette wearing a large golden, ball-gown, much like Belle in "Beauty and the Beast" and Tito sporting a blue jacket with gold epaulets, and white trousers. The photographer is a thin man with spiky, blond hair and a goatee.)

Photographer: Yes! Strike that pose. The image of canine perfection! (squeals like a girl)

(Fagin and Mr. and Mrs. Foxworth, who is carrying Alex, stand in the background.)

Fagin: (whispering) Remind me who this guy is?

Mr. Foxworth: Stryker Sparks. Dog photographer to the stars. He obviously didn't come cheap.

(End of photo shoot. Stryker approaches Fagin and takes him aside.)

Stryker: Listen, buddy. I've been around a few times, met a few big names, if ya get me. I think your little Chihuahua here has the "spark".

Fagin: (perplexed) The spark?

Stryker: You know what I mean! He's got the look! The charisma. The passion. (hands him a business card) Here's my card. Call me if you're interested. (saunters out of the door)

(Fagin stares at the business card. Later that evening, Tito is recounting his day to the gang.)

Tito: So, this Stryker guy reckons I got the "spark". Whatever that is. I could be on TV! Movies. Magazines!

Dodger: (sarcastically) Really? And just last week, I was doing a photo shoot in Paris for Canine Weekly.

(He struts around like a model on a catwalk. The rest of the gang laughs as Tito scowls.)

Rita: Good one, Dodge! (they slap five) Or just yesterday, I was having dinner with Julia Roberts.

Tito: (As the gang break into uproarious laughter) Okay, knock it off!

Francis: Look, we're just saying it seems a bit outlandish you got scouted.

Tito: Well, it happened. Believe it or not. So live with it.

(He stalks off, as the gang look on.)

(Setting: The next day, at a TV studio. Tito is on the set of a commercial, with a man, woman and young boy acting as a family. The cameras are rolling. Fagin and Stryker are standing in background.)

Boy: Woah, mom! What have you been feeding Lucky?

Woman: I've been feeding him Barkley's. It uses only natural ingredients.

Man: Only the best for our lucky boy. And only the best for dogs everywhere.

(Stryker giggles as the cameras stop rolling.)

Stryker: This is where the magic happens!

(Setting: The houseboat. The gang are gathered around the TV, watching Tito's commercial. Tito gives them a smug grin.)

Rita: Well, I never thought I'd say it, but, well done Tito! You're officially a celebrity.

Tito: Gracias!

Dodger: That's all well and good, but...

Tito: But what? Are you jealous, amigo?

Dodger: No! What, are you kidding? I'm just sayin', don't let this fame go to your head.

Tito: Hey, I'm still me.

(Cut to a montage of Tito taking part in magazine photo shoots, filming commercials and doing movie shoots. The gang are in Georgette's room, as Tito lounges on a cushion, wearing sunglasses.)

Tito: So, Stryker thinks he can pull some strings, get me to star in a new commercial of his. The whole drill.

Georgette: Alonso, as much as I'm happy for you, I'm not sure if---

Tito: Hey, don't tell me what to do, chica! It's my life.

(Georgette's expression changes to one of shock. Dodger jumps off a chaise longue and approaches Tito, with Rita flanking him.)

Dodger: You know what? That tears it! I don't usually stick up for your snooty poodle princess, but I'm just gonna come out and say it. Your attitude stinks!

Tito: Perdonome?

Rita: Tito, you're behaving like a spoiled brat! You wouldn't have even gotten this famous if it weren't for Fagin meeting Stryker.

(Suddenly, there's a knock on the door. Tito perks up.)

Tito: Speak of the devil. Adios!

(Tito races down the stairs, leaving the rest of the gang, staring on in awe.)

(Setting: Back at the houseboat. Fagin is moping in his armchair, staring sadly at a photograph of him with Tito. The gang watch from a distance.)

Fagin: (sighs to himself) Why did I ever let this happen?

Einstein: It just isn't the same without Tito.

Dodger: Are you kidding, Einy? If he wants to live like a stuck-up little prince, I say good for him!

Rita: You don't mean that, do you?

Dodger: I do! He's all famous like he's the king of the world. (voice begins to break) It's like he doesn't...(swallows) Like he doesn't give a monkey's butt about us. So why...(inhales)...should we...?

(Dodger breaks down, crying. The gang stare at him, with melancholic expressions on their faces. Einstein places a knowing paw on Dodger's shoulder.)

Einstein: It's alright.

Dodger: (recomposing himself) Thanks, Einy. I miss him too.

Rita: So do I. But, you're right. He's been behaving like a little brat lately.

(Meanwhile, Fagin stares at Stryker's business card. He walks out of the houseboat onto the deck, rips the card in half and drops it into the water, watching as it sinks to the bottom. Cut to commercial break.)

(Setting: A studio in Manhattan. Tito is getting dressed as an Egyptian pharaoh. Stryker is on the background, arguing with someone on the phone.)

Stryker: Look, I don't care! I have to get the flight to Paris, this weekend!

(He shuts his mobile phone off. He recomposes himself, before a cameraman approaches and leads him away. He is greeted by Mr. Foxworth, who has dyed his hair and mustache a sickening shade of blonde, and is sporting a black turtleneck sweater, sunglasses, pants and a baseball cap. Fagin is dressed in a baseball cap, brown jacket, white shirt and black sunglasses.)

Mr. Foxworth: (in an outlandish French accent) E-what is gooing on eherre?

Stryker: And who, pray tell, are you?

Mr. Foxworth: I am Rene LaPointe. International talente agente! And my good friend Gino Renaldi, famous talent scout.

Fagin: (in an absurd Italian accent) Ciao, bella! How-a do-a you do-a?

(Stryker looks perplexed.)

Mr. Foxworth: Ah have herrdd that e-you a-have a verryy talented Chihuahua!

Stryker: I do.

Fagin: And-a we-a have-a been-a sent by-a Steven-a Spielberg, because he-a is-a filming a new-a movie!

Stryker: (intrigued) Is he really?

Mr. Foxworth: Oui. And he needs ze petit chien to estarr.

Stryker: By all means! (He grabs Tito and hands him to Fagin) Tell Steven I'll take him to dinner!

(He waves them goodbye.)

(Setting: Back at the Foxworth house. Fagin is talking to Mr. and Mrs. Foxworth and Winston. They are back in their regular outfits.)

Winston: So, how did you manage to pull that off?

Mr. Foxworth: Well, let's just say, some fake business cards which I created on the internet, plus a bit of peroxide go a long way.

(He takes Fagin aside.)

Mr. Foxworth: Look, I'm glad you got your dog back. But, you owe me for this?

Fagin: Take you for dinner, anywhere you want?

Mr. Foxworth: Deal.

(Meanwhile, the gang are with Tito in Georgette's room.)

Dodger: So, you're sorry for the way you've been acting?

Tito: I am, amigo. I learned that, being famous is cool.

Francis: And?

Tito: But that doesn't mean I should forget about you.

(The gang cheer and gather around Tito, clamoring. Georgette takes him aside, and they canoodle.)

Rita: Well, at least she's happy.

Dodger: All this talk of fame, I actually was on tour this year.

Rita: With who?

Dodger: MJ was in New York this weekend. He invited me to travel with him.

Francis: That is the biggest lie I have ever heard!

Dodger: Says you!Like last time...

(Rita sighs and smiles, shaking her head, as Dodger continues his argument. Exterior shot of the Foxworth house.)

(End credits.)