WikiPlays/Embruss Part 1: Welcome to Embruss

Script
Nolan: Ok you guys wanna play one of the badass games currently out right now

Dillon: Badass game? ok.

Noah: Sure, why not?

(It cuts to the planet Earth)

Narrator: Life...was shattered a long time ago

Noah: OH SHIT! CLIPBOARD!

Narrator: There were only a few human survivors who escaped the clutches of Darason a dark lord who started the post apocolyptic space war (Earth explodes as a evil laughter is heard)

Dillon: Darason, sounds like an edgy YouTuber.

Narrator: However where did they go when Earth was helled at its knees they went to a unforseeing planet named Embruss (It shows all of Embruss) Where it says one is chosen to end the post apocalyptic space war

* Noah writes down all the stuff.*

Noah (writing): Earth is destroyed. Space war. Darason is evil and started the war. They went to a planet called Embruss. One is chosen to end the war- THIS IS JUST STAR WARS!

(Cutscene ends and shows a character creator)

Dillon (VO): Oh so it is Mass Effect.

Noah (VO): Alrighty, guys, whaddya wanna make this character like? Maybe make it some shit for DeviantArt dweebs.

Dillon (VO): Let's make Keanu Reeves.

Noah (VO): Even better!

(they create Keanu Reeves in a huge montage)

Noah (VO): And now that our 80s montage is done, time to play the fucking game!

(The game starts with their custom character waking up in a escape pod)

Male Voice (heavy breathing) W...Where the hell am I?

Noah (VO): You're in The Matrix.

Dillin (VO): Or Spongebob 3.

Noah (VO): Or John Wick or Toy Story 4, or Constantine.

(Noah controls the character to look around as he sees space while in the escape pod)

Male Voice: What happened i don't remember a lot...(strts to get visions in his head but thinks its just a headache Noah then uses the controller to see the computer but it doesn't turn on)

Male Voice: Damn It!

Noah (VO): Guys, the fucking computer's not working.

Dillon (VO): Boo hoo.

(Dillon moves the controller to turn it on one more time and it does as the male tries to locate on the map where he is)

Satan (VO): Let me play a sad song on the world's smallest violin.

Noah (VO): Satan, what are you doing here?

Satan (VO): What? Can't have a little fun?

Dillon (VO): No.

(The Male tries to radio for help)

Male Voice: Hello? Hello? is anyone there??...

(No reply, until someone does)

Noah (VO): AHA! OTHER PEOPLE!

Buddy: "Hello I am Buddy. An automated AI"

Noah (VO): Ah, never mind. Back to square one.

Dillon (VO): I guess this is a tutorial dude.

Male Voice: (sarcasm) Oh thats fuckin helpful

* The computer eventually turns on.*

Noah (VO): Oh, okay, looks like the computer is working!

Buddy: I am here to help you master your computer and mecha-suit.

Male Voice: Ok can you tell me where i am?

Buddy: Scanning...uknown

Male Voice: You gotta be fuckin kidding me

Buddy: (breaking fourth wall) Use the analog stick to move around but you probably already knew that.

Noah (VO): At least the game isn't lying.

Male Voice: Ok now what.

Buddy: You can use the X button to jump. But you probably knew that too. Now you can use triangle to punch

Noah (VO): No, to be fair, I thought A was to jump. Just a pro MLG tip Sonic taught me.

Male Voice: I have no clue what your talking about.

Buddy: Now some fun stuff. You can use the square button to quick fire a plasma bolt.

Male Voice: Square button? is that whats on my suit?

Buddy: breaking fourth wall.

Male Voice: just what exactly is a fourth wall?

Buddy: Definition....unsure

Noah (VO): Square buttons are really what... never mind.

Buddy: You can use L2 to aim your plasma bolt or any of the other projectiles I mention. You can use circle to summon an electro blade and swing it.

Male Voice: What the hell are you talking about?

Male Voice: Electro blade hmm interesting

Buddy: Finally you can walk up to a wall to climb it, use R2 to use a thermomachine gun, R1 for a forcefield and L1 to throw an ice grenade.

Noah (VO): When you're in the dark, and you need to see, you need E- (spams the Circle Button) ELECTRICITY! EEEEEEEEEEE-LECTRICITY!

Dillon: Damn it Noah.

* Suddenly Buddy detects Raiders*

Noah (VO): AHA! FINALLY, SOMETHING GOOD!

B.U.D.D.Y: Sir hate to inform but i see a ship approaching us wow its a big one and filled with other ships

* Raiders jump out of the ship as they look around and growl at the player*

Male Voice: Who the hell are these guys? "he tries to shake one off the pod

Noah (VO): Alrighty guys, we gotta take 'em out on a nice, lovely date, and eat at a fancy restaurant and drive 'em back home!

Buddy: Raiders. No good news.

Male Voice: Ok what are Raiders?

Noah (VO): Clipboard time!

B.U.D.D.Y: Raiders are psychopathic ravagers who would destroy anything and it appears to me they got the big boys finding you

Raider Guard: YEEEEEEHAAAAWWW!!!!!!!