Oh What A Night/Transcript

Oliver and Company: The Series

Oh What A Night

Act I

(Episode opens in Central Park. It is full of people, and the sun is shining. A young couple, presumably in their early 20s, are sitting on a bench, eating. The man stuffs his face, with a hamburger and French fries, slathered with sauce. His girlfriend, a pretty red-headed woman, who is eating a hot dog, gazes on in disgust at him. Unbeknownst to either of them, the gang are watching them.)

Young woman: Jason, your manners are appalling.

Young man: Come on, Lisa, what do you mean?

Young woman: I mean, I've seen pigs with better manners.

(Dodger and Rita, who are hiding in the bushes, turn to each other.)

Rita: Pigs have better manners? I'll have to see for myself.

(Dodger nods to Francis. He runs out of the bushes, pretending to be in pain. He collapses in front of the young couple.)

Young man: Oh my gosh! Are you alright, buddy?

(The man and his girlfriend jump off the bench to see to Francis, leaving their food unattended.)

Young man: Let's see what the problem is.

(While this is going on, Dodger sneaks up, and grabs the burger and fries, while Tito grabs the hot dog. Francis cocks one of his eyes open, and sees Dodger who motions for him to leave. He jumps up and takes off after them, leaving the young couple perplexed.)

Young woman: Want to explain that? (Her boyfriend shrugs)

(The gang take off, laughing.)

Dodger: You are good, Frankie!

Francis: Why, thank you. (grins proudly)

Rita: An Oscar-winning performance if ever I saw one.

Dodger: Come on. Let's eat.

(Later that day, the gang are at the houseboat. Dodger is sitting on his armchair with Oliver next to him. The two are watching a basketball match on TV.)

Dodger: Come on! Strike. No!

(He stalks off in anger. Oliver gazes his way. He turns to Rita.)

Oliver: What's up with him?

Rita: I don't know, but it probably isn't pretty.

(Dodger returns, having calmed down.)

Dodger: OK, I'm calm, I'm collected. I'm just...(breathes in)

Oliver: Well, I'm gonna go. Jenny's probably waiting for me.

(He exits.)

Rita: OK, Dodge. What's wrong? Tell me.

Dodger: It's just...I know we're responsible for looking after the gang and everything but, have you ever thought about having a break?

Rita: More specifically...?

Dodger: I'll cut to the chase. We need a break. A night out, if you will. Just us.

Rita: Well...

Dodger: Look, you don't have to do anything if you don't want to. I was just suggesting...

Rita: I'll sleep on it, OK? Deal?

Dodger: Deal.

(The next evening. Dodger is on the houseboat's deck, pacing back and forth. Tito and Francis watch on.)

Tito: Jeez, Dodger. Calm down. It's just a night out.

Dodger: I know, guys. It's just...

Francis: Ah, two lovers on a night out. I can't think of anything more romantic.

(Dodger glares at Francis.)

Dodger: Rita and I are friends. And just friends.